That's Just Speechie!

So long, and thanks for all the fish.

2008-05-07T15:45:00.002-06:00

Well, guys - I think it's time. My life gets more and more focused around things that are not particularly bloggable, as they're either confidential or personal. Thanks for reading and commenting and just being interested in what was happening.

Cheers to you,
Ela

Wherein Ela remembers how much she likes a schedule.

2008-04-08T21:04:00.002-06:00

Good evening friends!

It hasn't been too long since the last post (about 2 weeks, maybe?), but SO MUCH has happened! I spent days following my last post wrapping up clinic (hectic), CUP (enjoyable - I love presenting at the workshop*), and thesis ethics (currently being edited). I then spent the weekend organizing my stuff, and Sunday evening I headed out on the highway.

I'm back in my old bedroom, but my mum has completely redone it, and it's lovely. My parents were so cute my first night here... mum was bringing me towels (I do happen to know where they are, I did live here for 18 years!), and dad was telling me again and again to just help myself to whatever I want. He also reminded me of the one house rule: You can have whatever you want, but if it's the last one, make sure you write it on the list. Living with my folks is working out really well. It doesn't hurt that they're spoiling me rotten - my laundry miraculously gets done, dinner is on the table about 1/2 an hour after I get home, and if I write what I want on this little piece of paper by the phone, it shows up in the fridge a day or two later. It's like magic!

Aside from all of the spoiling, it's really nice to spend some time with my parents and grandparents. They're all pretty neat people, and I'm really enjoying being able to see them all a little more often.

Another nice thing is that I'm back on a strict schedule, and I'd forgotten how much I love it. Last semester was sort of all over the place, time wise (Monday and Wednesday at CUP, Tuesday and Thursday at clinic, Wednesday afternoon and Friday off...), and I didn't realize how tough that was for me. Now....

Monday- Thursday: I get up at about 6.15. I get dressed, go for a 30 minute run (I can run ALL THE WAY across Wetaskiwin in 15 minutes. That boggles my mind. I can't get ANYWHERE in Edmonton in that short a time!), come home, clean up, eat breakfast, make my lunch, and go to work. I come home from work, eat supper, do the dishes, do 40 minutes of toning with weights, watch some TV, talk to Jason on the phone, surf the 'net, etc. At 10.00 I get into bed. I read for 30 minutes. Then I turn out the light, and go to sleep. I like it!

Friday: Pretty similar to M-R, except that after work I drive to Edmonton. I eat dinner with Jason, I don't do any weights, and I probably stay up later than I should.

Saturday: I do as little as possible. No run, no weights, no work. It's nice. :) This will change when my ethics edits get back...

Sunday: Get up, go to church, hang out, drive back to Wetaskiwin at about 7, do my weights, get ready for Monday, into bed at 10, read for half an hour... :D

But the REALLY COOL thing is that stuff that happens in-between eating breakfast and coming home for supper: my placement.

Let me just say this: I LOVE MY PLACEMENT.

Today, I had one little guy from about 9-10. After lunch, I was walking through the halls to another child's classroom, and he spotted me.

"Are you coming to pull me out?" he asked hopefully.

"No, but you get to come and see me again on Friday," I told him.

"Friday?" he asked sadly. "That's a long way away."

I never thought I'd love pre-school/school-age treatment this much. But it isn't just the kids, as wonderful as they are. I have an amazing supervisor, who totally *gets* how independent I am, and who lets me run my own show. Nevertheless, she's incredibly supportive and is always willing to give me advice, or to jump in when what I'm doing isn't working. She is just FANTASTIC. And the Wetaskiwin SLP materials room is just awesome. They have every game, every book, every resource... all organized, all in good condition. I love going in there and poking around - you just never know what you might find!

My caseload is exciting and varied - from kids who are struggling with just one sound to toddlers who aren't making good eye contact to a stuttering case. I'm getting to see it all, and I couldn't be happier.

Great and varied clients + Excellent materials and resources + Superb clinical supervisor = one heck of a practicum. I love it.

Ela

*One participant told me that I was obviously very comfortable with my material, and that I had a great presentation style. "You didn't say 'um' or 'like' once!" It was such a nice compliment.

Her name is Artemis.

2008-03-29T08:09:00.003-06:00

I'd like you all to meet my newest friend. Her name is Artemis, and she is a beautiful, beautiful thing. She's actually a Leopard, despite the fact she looks like a compound bow. I just got her yesterday, (at my now beloved Sherwood Park Archery Lanes, land of the best customer service ever!), and she has already helped me to hit a bullseye! It was a very exciting moment, and I believe the older, redneck men at the lanes were somewhat entertained by my victory dance.

Buying a bow is a neat-o kind of experience. I decided to not go with a package, since it came with several features that I was really not very interested in (like an attached quiver - useful for hunting, but kind of awkward for target shooting). This meant that first I had to choose my basic bow. This involved me shooting them - but since they have no sights, my aim was WAY off. That was a little embarrassing - I actually shot one about 8 feet above the target. Whoops! Once you choose the bow (I went with the lightest one with the lowest amount of draw weight [it takes me about 35-40 lbs. to draw, more about that later] - I must not be as strong as I thought. More push-ups! More planking! More archery!), you choose your rest, your sight (improves my aim enormously!), and your release.

In order to facilitate a smooth release of the bowstring, most compound bows are not drawn with the archer's fingers. Instead, the archer wears a cuff with a clip on it around her wrist. She clips the 'release' (the cuff) to the bow string and draws back. Once she's found her target, she gently pulls a trigger that is attached the clip. The clip opens, the arrow is loosed, and the target is hit (we hope!). Here's a picture of one to help you imagine what it looks like.

It's a very cool system, despite feeling REALLY weird the first couple of times.

So as I mentioned before, this bow only takes me about 35-40 lbs. to draw the bowstring back. I say 'only' because this is pretty low in the world of archery. Jason's bow requires about 55 lbs., and the young man who was helping me yesterday draws about 65 lbs. Despite being low, it feels like a lot. :) The cool thing about compound bows is that there is a 'let-off.' If you pull the bowstring back far enough, the pulley system kicks in (in a magical, physics kind of way that I don't understand at all), and about 75% of the weight is let-off. That means I stand there holding about 10 lbs. - a manageable amount that lets me hold for quite a while while I line up my sight. Very neat.

Clearly, I'm really liking archery. Know what else I love about it? The verbiage: quiver (holds your arrows), fletcher (makes arrows), bowyer (makes bows), loose (releasing an arrow), nock (loading an arrow)... the words are so lovely. There's just one sad thing - there's not a really good verb for archery. Basically, it's "I'm going to do some archery." You don't say "I'm going arching" because that just sounds goofy. You could say "I'm going target shooting," but then your listener doesn't know if you mean guns or bows, and most people will assume it's guns. I was so saddened by this that I went a-googlin' to try and find a better phrase. I came up with an older phrase, almost archaic sounding, but very cool - 'loose.' (And if you're not very good, or you're me shooting sightless, that might be 'lose!')

I'm going to loose some arrows. Be back later.

Elizabeth

Archers, fletchers, and bowyers, oh my!

2008-03-27T14:46:00.003-06:00

Hello guys!

Look, look, I'm posting again! Go me. :) It's a good day - I went through my 'Clinical Completion Checklist' for this term's clinic, and I ticked off all of the boxes - done! What a great feeling to have all of those loose ends tied up. Tomorrow is CUP's Community-Based Research Workshop #2 - Doing CBR Well: Ethically and with Rigor. I'm presenting a morning section on the traditional/conventional ethics system, and I'm going to have to spend some time this afternoon going over what it is that I want to say. I'm looking forward to it - these workshops are very cool, and I've enjoyed every one that I've been to. And come about 4.30, when it's all wrapped up... then CUP will be done, too - at least until July. *grin*

On Tuesday, we had some "Auntie, Jason, Jacob" time, and we took ourselves down to the Sherwood Park Archery Lanes. I cannot recommend this place enough. We showed up knowing pretty near to nothing, and they were so helpful. The gentleman set us up with rental gear, showed us how to do everything, and let us try it a few times to get started. Then he came back over, made things a little tougher (but better!), gave us a few more tips, and let us try it a few more times. He continued to do that throughout the evening - give us something new to try, then go away and let us try it. He was so patient and so kind - a truly excellent teacher. Also, when Jason turned out to be too big for the rental bows, he allowed J. to use a non-rental bow (whether it was his own or perhaps a store model?) that was worth about $1000. After about 2 hours, I went to pay, and they only charged us for the rentals and ONE hour, saying that they were just glad we'd come out to give it a try, and they hoped to see us again. Jason had eight zillion questions about the different types of bow (compound vs. recurve, men's vs. women's), and the man answered every one of them patiently and intelligently, and he never pushed us to buy a thing.

Jason and I went to our respective jobs on Wedensday, and we both were telling our co-workers about our evening's activity. My co-worker said "Awesome - old school bad-assery!" Jason's co-worker said "Hey, I want to go! Are you free Friday?" So we're going to check out a Spruce Grove Archery place tomorrow night. I'm pretty pumped! Jason (of course) caught on to the whole thing really fast, and he was pretty darn accurate after a couple hours. I wasn't nearly as good, but the vast majority of my arrows were on the target (let's not discuss how close to the middle!), and I really enjoyed it. And Jake, despite having a bow that was a bit big for him (they must not rent to very many kids), did a great job, too. It was such a fun time, and I'm excited to go again tomorrow. Jason and I are even batting around the idea of buying our own bows - we'll just have to see!

But that's tomorrow - and first there's tonight! We're having a CUP girls' night, starting at the Chocoholics' Buffet at the Sutton Place Hotel. Mmmm, chocolate. Good thing I've been running and weight-training again! Then we're going to play video games, which should be lots of fun.

Well, I'm off to practice my workshop presentation - wish me luck!

Ela

It's only been 24 days!

2008-03-25T08:00:00.002-06:00

Really! It's only been 24 days since my last post. I'm certain I've gone longer than that before... and yet my silent stalker has raised her voice and asked for more! Makes me feel kinda special, actually *tear*.

So, more! Hmm. More... More what? Not a whole lot happens in my life these days that is terribly bloggable, some of that due to confidentiality (no client stories here) and sheer uninterestingness (I think it's sad that Jason managed to cut my toe the other day when he stepped on me, I'm not so sure anyone else cares). But I shall endeavour to tell you... more!

Thesis. I successfully defended my thesis proposal on 29 February. Since then, I've been working on my ethics application. It's currently a completed draft, sitting with my supervisors. Once they give it the thumbs-up, it will be sent in to the Health Research Ethics Board. Once approved, I can actually commence my focus groups and such. Sadly, until they give it the thumbs-up, my thesis is on hiatus. Not much happening there. Not that it stops hovering at the back of my mind and nagging me, or anything. There's just not a whole lot I can do about it. :)

Clinic. It's our last week of clinic at Corbett. This means tying up loose ends: writing reports, evaluating the experience, evaluating our supervisor, etc. We're going to have a princess party on Thursday, which will be fun. There will be balloons and bubbles and an obstacle course. Woot! I am also required to be evaluated, but happily for me, I got that out of the way last week. My final evaluation went really well, and my supervisor's and my opinions about my strengths and challenges were nicely parallel. She's an excellent clinician as well as an excellent supervisor - I think that I will miss her.

My next clinic experience starts on Monday, 31 March - which is not so very far away. I'm feeling a little nervous about the change, to be honest! It's in Wetaskiwin, which means that I'll spend M-F there, living with my parents, and the weekends here in Edmonton. I'm not too excited about the driving, but I think living with my folks will be pretty mellow. They're pretty cool, when it comes down to it, and hey, who can say no to free food? :D The neat thing about this placement is that the only treatment I'll actually do in Wetaskiwin will be with pre-schoolers at the health unit. Other than that, I'll be working at schools in Millet and Hobbema.

Hobbema presents an interesting challenge, because traditional language tests normed on white children are often inaccurate for Aboriginal children. English is used differently in the Aboriginal community. For example, longer pauses in between people speaking is considered normal in thier community, where in ours it likely would create awkward silence. Also, the Aboriginal culture tends to give more credit to the listener's intelligence - so the speaker might talk around his/her point, expecting the listener to be smart enough to figure out what the point is for him/herself. In our culture, talking around the point means that the speaker is unable to get to it, and is considered a bad thing.

Given these challenges, I was feeling a little worried about this portion of the placement. I want to provide good quality treatment to all the kids I see, and that means knowing how to conduct a good assessment. But we don't learn very much about assessing minority cultures in our program. What was I to do?

Go to work, of course! My research assistantship has NOTHING to do with speech-language pathology. It's not affiliated in any way, and the work that I do for them is not speech related either. Nevertheless, sitting at my cubicle one day, I overhead co-workers talking about 'culturally sensitive language assessment in the Aboriginal community.' I was out of my desk like a shot! I flew through the maze of cubicles, stuck my head 'round the corner, and said "Hi, I was eavesdropping. Tell me more?" Turns out that several of my co-workers (who are on a different project than I am) have been working on this issue for a while and had quite a few resources to offer me. How awesome is that? I'm feeling a lot better about things now, and I am really actually looking forward to next Monday.

Work. I'm wrapping up work at CUP this week, too. Tomorrow is preparing for a workshop and tying up the loose ends for where I'm at on the article I'm writing, and then Friday is the workshop, and I'm presenting part of it. I'm going to be sad to leave this job - the work was interesting and the people were wonderful.

So wonderful, in fact, that my supervisor has invited me back to work there full-time for July and August! This is such a sweet deal. Financially, I knew it would be best if I were to work during the two months in between my two placements. Logically, I knew it might be tricky to find a job that paid reasonably well that would be willing to take me for only 60 days. I'm never sure how to handle that situation - it seems best to me to say up front that I'm only available for two months, but then many people don't want to hire you. CUP hiring me back for that time allows me to finish working on some projects, as well as to have an income. Yay!

Life. Other than that, life has been pretty quiet. Jason and I had beer and wings with some friends last Wednesday, which turned into playing SuperSmash Brother till midnight, and that was very fun. I had Easter dinner with my folks in Wetaskiwin on Saturday, and that was lovely. I especially liked the part where my dad filled an Easter basket for me! :D And last night Jason and I had dinner with his mum and some of her friends. She has the most interesting group of friends ever. You just never know who you'll meet at her house, you just know that the conversation will be jumping!

Oh, and I got to go and see a premiere of Run Fatboy Run. I loved it! It was much sweeter than Sean of the Dead and Hot Fuzz, yet managed to be just as funny. It helps immensely that Dylan Moran has a bigger role in this one - I just love him to bits. I give this movie three thumbs up and recommend you see it!

Cheers all!
Elizabeth

A quote to tell you where I'm at...

2008-03-01T08:06:00.001-07:00

Ah, Winston. You had a way with words. Having completed the proposal defence:

"This is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning."

Couple stuff

2008-02-29T16:29:00.003-07:00

Hi guys!

Big day today - I defended my thesis proposal (NOT my thesis... this is just the beginning of the process, not the end!) this morning, and it went really well. I have some edits to make to my proposal, and then it will be off to ethics!

Elizabeth

Just the blahs

2008-02-21T16:08:00.002-07:00

Hello friends!

It is yet ANOTHER glorious day here in Edmonton (5*C and beautifully sunny!). I have had a lovely day. Which I especially appreciate given how 'blah' I had been feeling earlier in the month.

In fact, my lack of motivation, hypersomnia, changes in appetite, and general 'Debbie Downer' mood had me a little bit concerned that perhaps I was depressed. Jason told me that I really wasn't being myself, and wondered if I shouldn't be seeing the doctor about it. Kathie suggested maybe it was just the February blahs. I really didn't know. I didn't feel really 'sad,' so depression seemed a bit much. Yet it hadn't been a particulary grey or gloomy month either, so the 'blahs' didn't really fit either.

It must have been the blahs. The temperature has risen, the sun has been out every day, and I've been feeling like a new person. Yesterday I ran outside for the first time in (I'm embarassed to say) months. It was more of a walk than a run, and I had an asthma attack, but I was out there giving my best and it felt really good. I ran again today and had a much better time of it. Short-ish - only 20 minutes - but that's still better than being a lump of lard on the couch! So I'm celebrating being active and enjoying the sun, and I'm looking forward to more days where I can chug down the sidewalk listening to some of my favorite songs.*

I now have a new snowboard, so tonight I'm going to put my bindings (peeing men and all!) on it. Tomorrow I'll head over to Snow Valley and practice up some more - hopefully a shorter board will help me to feel more in control, and I'll be able to figure this turning thing out. Let's just say I'm hopeful, if not expectant. ;)

My clinic partner has been gone this week, and I've therefore had 2 solo sessions. Tuesday's was excellent - I was working with just 1 of the 3 girls, and she achieved some good things. I also made progress on some of my personal goals (like accurately taking data and being really enthusiastic and responsive to her accurate productions). Today's session... well, I was nervous. And I rarely get nervous. I'm very confident in my abilities as a student SLP. I know my strengths, I know my weaknesses, and I can work with them. But today I had a parent observing.

In my heart of hearts, I am an old-school, directive SLP. I do my thing in my room, then send the child home, and the parents are excited about the progress. I write them reports, they read them, maybe we conference... but I'm in charge, and clinic is separate from home. If I had no guidance, this is how I would run treatment. This is NOT the best way to do speech/language therapy. I, as the clinician, see the client for maybe an hour a week. They, as the parents, see the child... well, lots more. Treatment is most effective when the SLP can coach the parents so that they can provide the treatment at home. The SLP brings the speech/language expertise, but the family brings the 'child' expertise. They know their kid. They know what motivates him, what frustrates him, what works for him. You help them figure out tasks that move the child towards his goal, and then they work on them at home as well. You coach, facilitate, advise... and work yourself out of the picture. The ideal SLP is the one who winds up making herself obsolete to each client.

So having a parent in the room is a challenge for me. I feel a bit intimidated, and a LOT overwhelmed. Now I have to run the session, manage behavior, take data, AND include a parent. That means explaining what I'm doing in each task and WHY (vital! vital! Otherwise people think that all you're doing is coloring. Or climbing stairs. Or making a cow 'moo.' They don't see that each task also has a communicative component), and providing the parent with a role for each task. It's so great if you can include a parent, demonstrate the task, and then let her take over. You also want to ask for her input about her child. Does this task suit her child? Can she think of something that might work better? Can she see herself trying something similar at home? Does she have questions, comments, concerns, or advice? Including a parent in a session goes beyond having her watch - it's a chance for EVERYONE to learn. The child at the activity, the parent from the coaching, and the SLP from the parent's expertise.

I was therefore very pleased to sit down with my supervisor afterwards and have her tell me that I did an excellent job. I missed a few things, of course, and would love a second opportunity to go further in talking with mum than I did, but I did a solidly good job of having mum in the room. I successfully explained the rationale for our activities, talked with her about things her daughter finds motivating and frustrating, shared stories about her daughter's previous sessions, and invited her to provide any feedback she wanted, either today in person, or in the future through a communication book. It went really well. Yay!! I was so pleased.

So pleased that I went to the knitting store and bought the supplies for a new afghan!** It's going to be dark purple with wide turquoise bands and narrow lime green stripes. So cute. The lady at the store told me that she "likes people who are adventurous with colour." That's me! :D I'm excited to get started on it, so I'm going to go and get started.

I'm so glad it was just the blahs... it's so much better to be excited and loving life!

Elizabeth

*The Killers - All these things that I've done
SheDaisy - Don't worry 'bout a thing
Lily Allen - Alfie
Usher - Yeah

**Yes, I have one that's almost done. It's currently in Wetaskiwin. As soon as I get it, I'll put this new one on hold and finish the old one. But for now... it's all about the casting on.

I don't think my red coat is going to match this board...

2008-02-20T19:06:00.004-07:00

Maybe brown? Or orange? Or pink? It has to go with my new black skipants....

(Mine's got the pink bottom with brown script.)

Lovely, lovely

2008-02-19T09:53:00.003-07:00

Good morning friends!

It's a beautiful morning here - in fact, the whole weekend was gorgeous. It's funny how Alberta can go from -40* to above freezing in just a week or two.

We had a long weekend this weekend, which was fantastic. Jason and I took Jacob snowboarding twice, and we all had a good time. Jake is just learning, so I wasn't feeling totally left behind, but it made it harder for Jason to try and teach me to carve - a teacher can only teach so many students! One lady actually asked Jason what time his lesson was done at, I think in the hopes that he might be available to teach her child a thing or two. :) My carving is not carving yet - I'm still working on learning to turn, and that's not going so well. I'm much better than I was before, but I still chicken out and cancel lots of my turns halfway through. Someone needs to get over her fears. Oh well - I'll just keep going and practicing, and one day I'll get it!

Friday night we played games with one of Jason's co-wordkers and his family, and that was a lot of fun. It wound up being a really late night, and I was totally falling asleep at the te table, but it was worth it. Zombies!!! is such a great game. I just love it! And Carcasonne is cool, too - but I still don't understand the scoring. This makes it difficult to play with strategy. :)

Last night we went out for dinner with my familiy, and they were laughing at me and my stories about my attempts to snowboard. My mum leapt in with "but she does have some genetic anomalies...*" and Jason said "I know" in a very deadpan sort of way. I'm so glad I bring so much pleasure to my family.

So that was my weekend. I think this week is going to be a busy one. I'm meeting Karlie for tea today, then Jason and I are hanging out with Jake tonight. I need to get my defence presentation all together and ready to go, and I'd like to see if I can find some new (and affordable!) snowboard boots. Ah life!

Bye!
Ela

*I have a funny bone in my back that pushes my hips/legs out of alignment when I don't stand up straight. I also have abnormally short quads. My mum assures that this is why I look like a demented giraffe on rollerskates when I try to stand up from my bum when snowboarding. I'm not sure that's quite the reason, but I'll roll with it for now... :D

"Boys," she said with disgust.

2008-02-11T21:19:00.000-07:00

Just a quick anecdote for you tonight...

The other day I walked up behind Jason just after he'd finished changing his shirt so we could head out somewhere.

"Oh, honey," I said. "I think you need to put on a different shirt. This one reeks."

"Really?" he asked. "That's weird - it's clean, right off the shelf."

"Are you sure?" I queried, knowing his tendencies to (a) leave dirty clothes lying all over his place, and (b) pick stuff up off the floor to wear.

"I'm sure. What's it smell like?"

"It smells like...." I took a deep whiff. "It smells like...." Another deep breath in, and "It smells like rank a**, to be honest. What did you GET on this shirt, Jason?"

"I don't know," he replied, pulling it over his head. Pressing the shirt to his face, he inhaled. "It smells fine to me, Ela."

He tossed it over to me, and I too pressed it to my face and breathed in. "Weird - it smells fine now..."

"JASON. YOU JERK!! YOU FARTED, DIDN'T YOU? You STOOD there and FARTED and let me stand behind you and SMELL IT!"

Jason burst out laughing. "I didn't mean to! I didn't really even realize I'd let one slip. It was tiny, I swear!"

Boys!

Wishing...

2008-02-03T21:46:00.001-07:00

It's been a lovely weekend. The weather's been glorious (well, comparatively!), the food's been good (dinner with Jason's family for an early celebration of Chinese New Year's), and the workload has been light (got all our clinic planning done Thursday, and my thesis proposal and ethics application are both in for editing). Nevertheless, my Sunday evening melancholy has set in (as it is wont to do), and I am feeling a wee bit wistful.

What do I wish for?

1) I wish for more motivation. While I'm on top of the things that need doing, I certainly had some extra time this weekend that could have been used to get ahead. I am not ahead. I have, however, consumed a ridiculous amount of Mini Eggs (no Eggies, those things are revolting), watched Mr. & Mrs. Smith, and somehow leveled up my WoW paladin to 70 (a fact meaning nothing to those of my readers who reside in the real world *grin*). I have friends who use extra moments to move ahead, to better themselves, to organize, to clean, to study. I use them to nap. *sigh* I wish I weren't such a lazy bum. I also wish that this wasn't something I could actually work on. Having written it down, I'm well aware that this is something I can do something about. *wink*

2) I wish there were more hours in the day, and that schedules didn't collide so often. I spent time with friends and with Jason's family this weekend, but there were at least 3 more sets of friends I'd have like to have seen, as well as perhaps seeing something of my family (tricky with no vehicle at the moment, but probably doable). Yet trying to squish plans with 8 or 12 people into weekend is kind of difficult. It also conflicts with valuable napping time (see point #1, above).

3) I wish bacon weren't so tempting. Actually, breakfast in general. How can one say no to bacon, sausage, eggs, and hashbrowns? And even though I don't really want the toast, I always have to eat at least half a slice of it... what's breakfast without some strawberry jam?!

In short, I ate all kinds of deliciously bad food this weekend, lazed about with people I like and love, and got no work done whatsoever. I'm not really looking forward to it being Monday tomorrow - let's call it a long weekend, shall we?

Love,
Elizabeth

Baby it's cold outside...

2008-01-31T10:41:00.000-07:00

Yuck. The weather has been so yucky lately. I know that I live in Edmonton, and I know that comes with some chilliness, but -47*C (-53*F) with the windchill is a little much. "My" car (as in Jason's car that I drive) won't start and doesn't have a blockheater, so I'm carless again. Oh, ETS - how I didn't miss you. At all. On the other hand, I'd forgotten how fun it is to wear ski pants (*vwip vwip, vwip vwip* all the way to school), and how neat it feels when your eyelashes freeze together. Luckily, it's warming up, so I don't have to worry about freezing any exposed skin in less than a minute!

In other news, everything else is going really well. Clinic continues to be both fun and challenging, work is interesting and enjoyable, and I'm getting work done on my thesis (ethics application and presentation for my proposal defence). These things are what the majoirty of my life is based around right now, and that's Ok by me. I'm finding this term to be just the right amount of work, and I'm feeling pretty balanced. (A little more exercise is needed, but once it warms up a bit more I'll get back to the gym with B.).

Jason and I have been hanging out with our couple friends lately, which is fun. We played Settlers of Catan with Al and her husband two weeks ago, and then we went to Kathie and Brandon's this weekend for dinner and a game of Zombies!!! As gross as it is, I kind of like this game. :D Jason and I also hung out with Jake on Tuesday, which was lots of fun. We played some video games, a round of Zombies!!! (I won!), and then some WoW. Good times were had by all (thank you Minnie Johnson of the Wetaskiwin Times Advertiser). Tish and Larissa have been trying to catch us to go out for wings with them, but we haven't managed to line our schedules up yet. And B. and her boyfriend want togo out for dinner and then learn how to play Settlers, so that's going to happen sometime in the near future too, I think.

It's kind of weird to be in a place in my life where I have couple friends. This weirdness obviously needs to be counteracted with individual friend time! And so, I had breakfast withTegan (whose real name I will use from now on, as she no longer has the same schedule as me, and you cannot stalk her via my blog) last weekend, dinner with Robin and Caitlin the week before that, and dinner with Rachel (the newest friend in my life) last night. All in all, very satisfying.

So that's where things are at right now. Hope you're all keeping warm and drinking loads of cocoa with those little mini-marshmallows.

Love,
Ela

Polymer Clay

2008-01-22T21:44:00.000-07:00

Hey look! Christmas polar bears. :) I'm working on making some canes and beads now... pictures when they're ready!

Elizabeth

Happy New Year!

2008-01-18T14:00:00.001-07:00

Hello friends!

A happy 2008 to you all - it's been good to me so far, and I hope it continues that way.

New Year's Eve in Jasper was a really fun getaway. Our first day, the four of us (Jason, Aaron, and Megs) sat in the hotel room and played the Wii's Big Brain Academy. It was sooo addictive. And it was really funny - As long as the teams were 1 boy and 1 girl (didn't matter which), we were evenly matched. However, girls against the boys meant that the girls lost. :) My one criticism of the game would be the lack of language tests - I think a big brain is one with a good vocabulary! Some definitions, synonym/antonym pairs... things like that would have made it better.

Our second day was the day on the hill... and let's just say I didn't do too well. My inability to carve really bit me in the arse... or more acurately, my quads. Trying to heelside my way down the whole mountain didn't work out so well. The time has come for me to learn to carve, and this will require me to get over my fear. Think I could find a psychological snowboarding coach? :) If it isn't too cold tomorrow, maybe I'll hit the hill again.

Our third day, the boys hit the hill, while we girls lazed about, wandered the town, and relaxed. As it was New Year's Eve, we went out for dinner at the Fiddle River, and it was lovely. I had lobster for the first time - wonderful! We then crashed back at the hotel and watched Hot Fuzz. An excellent film. We had a champagne toast at midnight, and it was such a nice way to ring in 2008 - sitting with good friends, watching a good film, and drinking champagne.

We drove back the next day and attempted to find somewhere to eat some lunch. Not much was open, so I suggested the truck stop in Hinton. Jason says "are you sure they even serve food there?"

"Um yes - see the giant knife and fork on the sign?"

"Well, I've never really eaten at a truck stop. You're such a small town girl!"

Hard to argue with that, really. :)

My semester has been going incredibly well so far. Mondays and Wednesdays I'm at CUP, where I'm working on various projects and am developing an idea for a possible publication. Tuesdays and Thursdays, I'm in clinic, where I'm working with 3 little girls (all under 4) who have language delays. This is different from my client this summer who had speech difficulties, but intact language (can't remember the difference? Look here.) These little girls are darling, and I'm already enjoying working with them. Fridays are free for thesis work.

Some extra nice things? (1) My clinic partner, B, is fabulous. I just love her. She's hard working and efficient, and a complete pleasure to work with. (2) B and I are going to the gym together Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday mornings, which is lovely. (3) My proposal draft is completed, and is under final edits. I'm hoping to defend it by early February, and then get cracking on my actual research. Whee!

One sad thing is that Jason agreed to take social dance classes with me once a week (waltz, foxtrot, etc.)... but the class was full. :( There's only one class a week offerred late in the evening, the only time that Jason is certain to be free... and the wait-list is 6 couples long. Oh well... maybe next semester!

That's my update for now - have a lovely weekend!

Elizabeth

Progress

2007-12-27T16:23:00.000-07:00

Hi friends!

When last I left you, your darling Ela was in tears at the bottom of the Snow Valley bunny hill. Since then, Jason took me for a second lesson, which was slightly better. There was a lot more standing, some controlled 'floating,' and even some appropriate stopping. There was not, however, a whole lot of fun. I was still really frustrated with my inadequacy, and Jason was doing a very good job of being patient with my cranky attitude. Leaving the hill after 4 or so hours of up the carpet down the hill, I was starting to regret agreeing to learn.

The Christmas season then leapt upon us, and I was kept busy writing finals and getting gifts together. My finals went really well - even the one that I wrote in 35 minutes. *grin* It was the last final, and I was SO ready to be finished. We had a really nice 'graduation' banquet,' where the girls looked lovely and the boys looked handsome, and one of my classmates delivered an absolutely perfect poem about our experiences as the class of '08.

Christmas was wonderful. Christmas Eve Jason and I were with my family at K & B's house. We ate a nummy dinner, exchanged gifts, and played with Jake's new Wii. Big Brain Academy? So much fun. Sadly, Jason wasn't feeling 100%... and he started feeling worse as the night wore on. Christmas morning we opened our presents for each other - I got him symphony tickets, Starship Catan, and Carcassone: The Castle. He got me Mulan, Finding Nemo, and Leonard. Who's Leonard? Leonard is a Warm Buddy sheep, and I love him. He is SO cute. SOOOOOO cute. And I love him deeply. He's wonderful. He's the best gift ever. :) I also got PJs and Christmas socks from mum and dad... and snowboard pants.

My old ski pants didn't like to stay up, as they didn't have a belt or drawstring, and the slid down off of my yoga pants all the time. My new ones are gorgeous, and they have an adjustable waistband. Well, you can guess what new snowboard pants mean... they mean it's time to try again. I mentioned that I was heading to the hill today, and my uncle asked if I'd like to take my two cousins along with me. These two Californian boys are both natural athletes, and had been once before, so I readily agreed. If it had required me to attempt to teach them something, I would have said no way. :) Jason had to work, which is too bad, so it was just the three of us who went out to the hill. And you know what? It was GREAT! The boys had a couple rough runs to start, then figured it all out. By the time we left, they were going off a jump on a slightly more difficult hill... one that I'm so not ready for yet. :) They looked fantastic.

How did I look? Well, not quite like them. I'm not a natural athlete, and I have a healthy respect for what gravity can do to me. That being said, I did a pretty good job. My drifting (the bit where you go down the hill from side to side) is looking good, especially heel-side. I need to continue working on my toe side control - it's hard to move from side to side when I'm so worried about mowing someone over. Dangers of going down the hill backwards, I guess. :) I'm also getting a lot better at standing up from a seated position. And the coup d'etat of the day is that I can get off the carpet, strap in my 2nd foot, and snowboard the more level portion of the hill. It used to be that I'd get off the carpet, UNSTRAP my 1st foot, and walk over to where the hill is steep enough for me to get going when standing perpendicular to the hill (the easiest way to control your speed). Now I can board that part of the hill by switching from being parallel to perpendicular. Because it's so level, I can control my speed while I'm doing this. The next step is to practice switching from parallel to perpendicular while going down the steeper portion of the hill.

It was so great to go out and spend 4 or so hours on the hill and to really enjoy it. I'm sorry that Jason didn't get to share my first day of enjoyment - given that he had to put up with so much crappy attitude earlier on. But at least now I'm feeling more ready for Jasper for NYE. I'm going to go tomorrow morning, too - and continue with my practicing. After that, I'm going bowling with my cousins which should be very fun. Possibly also painful, given how my arms are feeling after pushing me up onto my feet a zillion times today. :)

I am really looking forward to our New Year's Eve in Jasper. Turns out the hotel has a hot tub, which will come in wildly handy after a day on the slopes. :) Our NYE reservation is at the Fiddle River Seafood Restaurant, and it sounds like the food should be really good. Plus, the day that Megs and I spend reading and lazing (while the boys board the harder runs) is going to be excellent. I can sense it from here. :)

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas, and I wish you the best in 2008!

Love,
Elizabeth

Wherein Ela is something of an idiot

2007-11-26T14:27:00.000-07:00

As an attempt to apologize for the lack of posts (given the hectic semester), I thought I would share some entertaining stories with you regarding my various spectacular talents.

Ela is a Spectacular Skipper
A few weeks ago I was in thesis crunch time. My supervisors were strongly encouraging me to get a substantial (Ok, Ok, they wanted the whole thing, but I knew I wasn't going to be able to swing that) portion of my proposal turned in for edits, and there were quite a few demands from other classes as well. In light of this, I chose not to attend one of my 8am classes, and instead committed that time to wrapping up some loose ends on my draft. When I got to school, it was about 10 am, and the class I had skipped should have ended 10 minutes previously (8-9.50). As I came up the stairs, I could hear the professor still lecturing, so I headed down the hall to the washroom. On my way there, I bumped into one of my supervisors, and she pulled me into her office so we could quickly discuss an email I'd sent her the night before. We're chatting away, when all of a sudden I can hear the instructing professor's voice coming closer and closer.

Oh yes. Can you say awkward moment? In comes the instructor - she's demoing an amplification system to the entire class, carrying a microphone around to show my classmates how, if you forget to turn the mic off, people can hear everything you say. Everything. Including things like "Oh, Ela! Why aren't you in class?" Yeah. Uh huh. Hm. That was awkward. When I walked into class about 5 minutes later, my face turned as pink as my pashmina as all my peers howled with laughter.

Ela is a Spectacular Snowboarder
Jason loves snowboarding. Loves it. Every beautiful day we've had this November, he's complained because it isn't snowing. So when he heard that Snow Valley had managed to get enough artificial snow down to open, he decided it was time for me to learn. We went to Totem and bought me some used boots and bindings (the bindings have a little stick figure on them... and he's peeing. I think it's because the brand name is Liquid, but still! He's peeing!), and he had a board for me to use, so we headed out to the hill.

Those of you who know and love me know these two things about me: 1) I have no athletic ability whatsoever, and 2) I'm afraid of things that involve falling and hurting. Therefore, this whole thing of 'learning to snowboard' seemed a little daunting. Nevertheless, I was determined to be a trouper. Off we went. Snowboard on? Check. Waddling through the snow, dragging said snowboard, to get to the carpet up the hill? (It's like a conveyor belt in the snow that you stand on to get to the top.) Check. Buckling other foot into snowboard? Check. Standing up? Not check. I can't get on to my feet from a bum-sitting position. Jason pulls me up. We commence down the hill. I fall a lot. Only it isn't really falling, because I never get going fast enough to actually fall. I just sit down every time it feels like I might be going fast. Which is frequently the case. Jason is very patient, and encouraging, and holds my hands the whole way down. Yes, you read that right. He snowboarded down the hill in front of me, holding me up. He is amazing. I.... I.... I suck. Let's just be honest.

Next time up, I realize that I'm really quite good at standing up from a kneeling position. This, however, means that I'm facing UP the hill - as in I'll have to snowboard down it BACKWARDS, since I don't know how to turn. Also, I'm afraid of falling, so I'm hesitant to stand up straight. Therefore I'm sort of scooting down the hill, butt in the air, hands on the ground. The bonus is that I can look through my legs and make sure I don't hit anyone. Jason tells me that this is not adequate. I cannot, he assures me, snowboard in the mountains for New Year's Eve on my hands. Darn. I practice standing up. Now I'm getting Ok at going backwards down the hill. Can't really see anyone, have a hard time going straight (lots of weaving), and I can't stay up for more than 10 seconds before I panic and kneel down, but I'm Ok.

Time to practice getting up off my bum, right? I need to be able to go down the hill facing forwards. I try. And try. And try. And my legs are burning, and my butt is wet (my ski pants kept sliding down), and I am SO FRUSTRATED. I can't do it. Jason hauls me to my feet, and we head down the hill. I can now stay up for about 12 seconds before panicking and sitting down. Impressive, I know. We get to the bottom, scoot over to the conveyor belt, and the man in front of me says "first time snowboarding?"

"Yes."

"Yeah, I could tell. You're quite a sight up there."

.... Um... thanks? Geez!! Way to boost my confidence, mister!

"You should try... (insert litany of advice here)."

Yes. I'm so sure that I want to try your advice, part of which included 'floating down the hill like a leaf.' I'm not really a floater. I'm more of a 'tumble down the hill like a rock' kind of girl.

Back at the top, I'm trying to get up to standing from my bum, and it's still not working. I'm cold. I'm wet. I hurt. My ego is seriously bruised from leaf-boy (I had myself convinced that everyone was too busy focusing on themselves to worry about the crazy girl in the red coat with the peeing men on her bindings). And I can't. Get. Up. I am very frustrated. Tears spring to my eyes. But darnit! I AM BEING A TROUPER. Jason pulls me up, and we head down the hill. Towards the end, I lose control, and snowboard over top of him. My knee gets slightly twisted. Just a bit. Not very much. I cry. I try to stop. I AM BEING A TROUPER, DAMNIT! Nope. I'm not a trouper. I'm frustrated and I hurt and I'm tired and I'm crying and Jason is saying...

"Want to stop for today?"

Oh thank the Lord. Do I ever want to stop! Hurray for stopping! I'm totally Ok with stopping. Yes, yes, I'll try again, but we can be done for today! Jason has told me that he can teach me to do this in three days, and this is one day down...

"So that was two and a half hours."

What?? That doesn't count as a day??? Oh shoot, what have I signed up for?

I'll keep you posted.

Ela

How to Make an Ela Feel Fabulous

2007-11-09T16:50:00.000-07:00

Witness: winter brunette locks full of volume, and nicely tinted eyebrows (no more pencilling them in!)

Ela is grumpy:

Ela remembers that she is happy because she looks so fab:

I feel that this haircut is slightly reminiscent of Tiffany-Amber Thiessen's in 90210 - yet I love it anyway. The volume suits me better than poker straight hair, and I get to keep the length. :)

So that's how I spent my Friday - shoved some corks up my nose, then went and got pampered. Lovely!

E.

So it's a little more 'bumpy' than 'gentle'

2007-11-09T07:59:00.000-07:00

Hi friends,

I thought the wind up to the term would go a little more smoothly than it has, which was highly optimistic of me. :) I'm still in four classes, my thesis still needs work, and I'm still putting in at least 15 hours a week at work. I managed to go head to head with some sort of flu-thing this week, and that's got me a bit behind.

But Fridays - lovely Fridays - are now a semi-free day for me. I'm going into school at 11 to practice using the PERCI-SAR system (which used to be called PERCI-SARS... at least, until the SARS outbreak!) and to figure out where the protocol for using it came from. (You always get clients to say 'pee pee pee' and I need to know why!) Then I've got a hair appointment this afternoon, which I'm really looking forward to. I always find them so relaxing, and I like having fancy hair. It's time to do something about 67 different colors that in there, so I'm thinking I might be a slightly darker brunette come this afternoon at about 4 o'clock.

Tonight we're going to pick up Jason's new car, which is tres exciting. I am especially excited because he is allowing me to drive his old car. We've made the switch on the insurance (I'm now the primary driver), and we're going to look for a new bumper and hood for it this weekend (it's a little beat up, but a perfect about-town car for me).

I'm feeling a little behind in my schoolwork these days, given how much time I've given to my thesis recently, but I'm hanging on to the fact that I usually wind up feeling this way at the end of every semester, and I've always made it through before! I'm really enjoying resonance (a class that is the 2nd half of "Voice and Resonance"), and since it's the topic of my thesis, I'm feeling slightly ahead of the game.

The rest of this month is looking a little hectic. There's still lots to be done on my thesis, my workplace is holding another workshop, and this time I will be one of the presenters, there are school projects and such.... And then there are the social things! It was Jake's birthday on the sixth, so we're going to his house for some cake and celebration tomorrow. Then it's Jason's and my six-month anniversary on the 17, so I think we'll probably go out for dinner. Jason's good friend Tish is getting married on the 20, so that should be a fun evening... all in all, I think the next three or four weeks are going to fly by!

Well, I should go and get cleaned up and head into school. Corks up my nostrils*, here I come!

Love you,
E.

*It's how you use the PERCI-SAR, I swear. And if I were you, I wouldn't ask too many questions unless you want to come and try it out. ;)

And so begins the gentle descent.

2007-10-26T08:26:00.000-06:00

Morning my friends. It's Friday morning, 8 am, and I'm not at school. I'm not skipping, I'm not sick, and no one died. It's just that we wrapped up our Augmentative/Alternative Communication class last Friday, and it's now done for the term. This leaves my Fridays open for me to get other things done, which is fantastic!

Today, for example, I'm going to an elementary school in Riverbend to give two presentations on hearing protection. I'm looking forward to it, actually. Our prof warned us to be prepared to engage with the kids about how hearing is important to us, so I was trying to think of examples that students in my classes might be able to connect with. Obviously, announcing that hearing my boyfriend tell me he loves me is going to make them gag, and telling them that hearing my profs teach is going to make them think I'm an obnoxious keener. ;) As I puttered around this morning I came up with two examples I think the kids will like. One, when I'm playing World of Warcraft I need to be able to hear the rogues stealth. For those of you who don't play (i.e., the 98% of my social circle that is sane and not uber-geeky), a stealthed rogue is character who's almost invisible, and who is probably going to kill you. Two, I like being able to eavesdrop when I ride the bus. It makes those long trips so much more entertaining! I'll let you know how those presentations go.

My thesis is coming along slowly but steadily. I feel quite good when I realize that I've worked on it just about every day now. I feel like I'm staring into a black abyss complete with a balrog when I realize that I'm meant to be done this draft by 'the end of the month' and today is 26 October. Someone needs to get cracking!

Yesterday was one of my CUP co-worker's last days, so we all went out for lunch. Over the course of the meal, my supervisor called down the table to ask me where my hometown was.

"Oh, I grew up in Wetaskiwin," I replied.

"So did L-----!" my supervisor said.

"Neat! Did you know Dennis Huebert? He worked at the high scho--..."

"Dennis Huebert? Like MISTER Huebert?" L----- asked, incredulously.

"Yeah, he's my da-..."

"Oh I knew him. I knew him well. I spent a ... fair ... amount of time in his office!"

It was so cute. You just never know where you're going to run into someone that your dad had to pinkslip these days!

Aaron (Jason's best friend and Megan's boyfriend) flew into Edmonton yesterday to spend the weekend here for his sister's wedding. He and Megan and Tish and Larissa all came over to Jason's to spend the evening just hanging out. Those three boys together are utterly ridiculous, and I do believe that Jason just about laughed port out of his nose while Tish came close to aspirating a large chunk of pepperoni pizza. Now that's the mark of a good evening. Larissa, Megan and I were much more subdued. ;) There was some talk of the six of us going to Banff for NYE, something the boys have done frequently, and that Larissa did last year with them. It sounds like it could be a lot of fun... let's hope that I learn to snowboard by then, so I'm not stuck in the lodge, by the fire, with a book, and a hot chocolate.... Wait. Wait just a minute. Not learning to snowboard is starting to sound like the better option here. :D

A sort of spare moment

2007-10-15T17:02:00.000-06:00

Clearly, life's been a little crazy recently. I often think about getting a blog post up, but there aren't a lot of free moments around to do so! I'm stealing this one on the grounds that I just wrote a midterm and I therefore deserve a short break... even though I do need to do an aug. com. assignment and a fluency lab tonight. :)

So here's the nutshell version of "Things in the Life of Elizabeth."

Work. I've been doing 3 hours a week at COMPRU, and really enjoying it. I'm splitting my time between digitizing casette tapes and analyzing the cookie swallow portion of modified barium studies. This is great, because I'm gaining familiarity both with speech software (Computerized Speech Lab) and with swallowing studies. I've also been fortunate in that my supervisor has granted me access to her lab's database of research articles, giving me the opportunity to look at articles that aren't available on-line without having to go to the library. (I hate going to the library to get articles. It's a total gong show, given that you can't safely leave your things ANYWHERE, and the photocopiers are always far away from the journals that I need, and there's never anyone around to show me how to doubleside.) I now have a stack of articles on nasopharyngoscopy that I can work into my thesis!

I really like my new position at CUP as well. I'm there 12 hours a week, and I've been getting some great experience in academic writing as well as with the ethics process for research. Both of these are skills that are applicable to my thesis, so yay! I like the people that I work with, the work that I do, and the theoretical premise behind the existence of the organization. Could it really get any better?

School. I officially wrote the final midterm of my Master's program today, and that's feeling pretty good. I did very well on the first midterm I wrote (Adult Language Disorders II), and am feeling good about today's as well (Fluency). It's a busy term, and I have lots to get done yet today... including writing the goals for our Augmentative/Alternative Communication class and completing the second lab for Fluency (it's a lot of counting stutters and determining severity, etc.). My goal of doing all the reading this term has completely bitten the dust, and I'm mostly just reading for Adult Language and Fluency, since those seem to be the two classes where it actually matters. Things are quite stressful right now, but will be much, much better at 12 on Friday, so it's manageable.

I met with my thesis peeps today to discuss my prospectus. Dr. B feels that I'm getting close enough to completing it that I should incorporate the details into my current draft (e.g., table of contents, reference list) and submit it for a final read by the end of the month or so. She and Dr. H will read and edit it twice, and then it will go to Dr. R (my committee member) for another read. Given all of this, it's coming close to the time for me to pick a date to defend my prospectus. This is a mini-defense; only Drs. B, H and R will be there. We sign the formal contract delineating our roles and responsibilities, and then I go to ethics. This is feeling stressful and worrisome, given how much work I still see needing to be done, but if my peeps think I'm getting close, then I'm getting close, and I'll get through this somehow.

Life. Life has also been busy. I've been attempting to attend church, Tegan's Bible study and Knox's Bible study, and doing so with limited success. I'm kind of now aiming for 2 out of 3 in a week, but have settled for just one a couple of times. :) Jason and I have also been spending some time with his friend Tish and Tish's fiancee Larissa, which has been very nice. We went bowling last weekend, and that wound up being a lot of fun. We also try to hang out with Kathie and Brandon and Al and Scott every couple weeks or so, mostly to play board games, which is excellent. It's really nice to spend a Sunday afternoon just playing games and hanging out.

All in all, life is hectic but good. I'm stressed and a bit frazzled (my English skills are going down the tubes, which is always a sign that I'm tired), but enjoying my classes, my work, my friends, and my boyfriend. Plus, my wonderful sister has taken the burden on of finding me something to wear to Tish and Larissa's wedding as well as to my grad celebration in December. I tried, but my dress shopping attempts mostly resulted in tears and a dress that I loved but both Kathie and Jason thought looked cheap. Yay for Kathie finding me something nice!!

Love y'all,
Elizabeth

Balance

2007-09-16T22:17:00.000-06:00

This weekend invovled doing some Aural (Re)Habilitation homework and some studying for fluency. It also involved playing some WoW, which is becoming even more fun since all of Jason's co-workers are playing, and we can run instances together, and finishing up some sculpting.

Here's my most recent piece. He's about 3" long, and about 2" tall to the tip of his tail. His whiskers are actually old guitar strings!

Cat. September, 2007. Artist: Elizabeth Huebert. Medium: Polymer Clay

I'm currently working on a mouse for him to play with, and another figure that I'm basing on a cartoon character. More pictures when they're finished!

Cheers,
Ela

Unbalanced: A Question of Priorities

2007-09-14T11:53:00.000-06:00

I'm feeling frustrated at the moment. Yes. Frustrated is a good word. Frustrated in a vague general sense at our society's "live to work" attitude (I wish I were in Italy: "work to live" baby!), and more specifically, at being in a career where many of our instructors, mentors, and role models give lip service to 'balance' in their lives, but model a workaholic's existence.

I'm not even sure where to start, my head is so a-jumble with ideas and frustrations. Hm... It seems like the English 10 'funnel' of 'start general, end specific' might be a good way to go. So here goes!

Generally speaking, I believe that work is just one part of our lives. I believe that if I sign up for a 1.0 FTE position, I should be working 40 hours a week, not 50, or 60, 80. I fully understand that there will be exceptional times and circumstances wherein it will be necessary for me to stay. I'm Ok with that. What I'm not Ok with is being expected to work a 1.5 or 2.0 consistently after having been hired for a 1.0.

I feel similarly about school. YES, school is a priority. YES, it's important. YES, unlike a career, it is time-limited (as in, your program only lasts so long, be it 4 years or 2). That doesn't change my belief that school should not be the 'be-all, end-all' of my existence while I'm a Master's student.

Many members of my program have priorities that look like this:
1) SCHOOL
...
...
2) family/friends/significant other
3) hobbies
4) themselves

Their priorities are, of course, their choice. What concerns me is when I see a number of these women exhibiting clear symptoms of emotional and mental unwellness because of their obsession with their schoolwork. It concerns me to hear classmates talk of never getting enough sleep, of never seeing their friends, of having no time to do the things they love. How is this healthy? At what cost are they doing their very best in the program? Is it honestly, well and truly worth it? Is it truly their 'very best' when they're exhausted and frustrated?

I believe the answer is 'no.' Research shows that our degrees will be obsolete in 3 years - what will matter most is our experience in the field. CASLPA (our national college) explicitly states that it expects new graduates to be generalists, not specialists. And one or two of our professors have acknowledged that what really matters is a solid grounding coupled with the ability to know where to look when you have a question. With all of that in mind, why are we worry ourselves sick about cramming every morsel of knowledge into our heads, knowledge that most of us will have forgotten by the time we get to our first jobs? Why isn't our focus on grounding ourselves in the field, and becoming familiar with the resources available us?

Our focus is on being over-achieving excellence monkeys because a) we're SLPs, and most of us are Type A overachievers to begin with, and b) because that's what our role models show us. I have heard several professors in my department discuss the high burnout rate in speech, advocate for balance, then be in their offices from 7am til 7pm 5 days a week and be editing student work over the weekend. I have heard ONE clinician advocate for balance and actually demonstrate it in her career - and the whole time she was telling us about it, her tone was so apologetic that I'm convinced she gets very little respect for what I believe is a wise and healthy choice.

Today it was suggested to me that perhaps I might find it necessary to put Jason 'on hold' and 'see what he's made of' during this heavy semester. This comment stemmed from something that I had said about it being difficult to have a boyfriend who works an 8-5, and has evenings and weekends generally free. Jason wants to spend much of that time with me, and I would like to spend that time with him as well. My priorities look quite different from those above:

1) Me and my health (including faith, physical and mental health, etc.)
2) School, friends, family
3) Hobbies
4) Other commitments (e.g., junior church)

I consider my family and friends to be just as important as school. Quite often I don't get to see my friends as much as I'd like because of school commitments. Conversely, sometimes I don't do all of my readings because meeting with Al for a coffee is more important. It's a difficult balance, but one that supports my number one commitment: me and my health. It's distressing to me to be told that for four months, I should put everything on hold and go 100% all out on schoolwork. Firstly, I'd make myself crazy doing that. I need the social part of my life in order to be sane. I need to walk away from schoolwork, and not just once or twice a week. I need some time every day where I can be just Elizabeth, not Elizabeth-the-student. Secondly, it would do a lot of damage to the relationships in my life. It's hard to maintain a friendship when you give no time to staying in touch or being available. I'm not asking to maintain 36 different friendships - I'm thinking of three that are vital to me, and that I have no interest in 'putting on the back burner' just because school is heavy. Thirdly, I have no desire to implement unhealthy, unsustainable patterns in my life. If I do nothing but school for the next four months, either I'll be burnt out or I'll be well-practiced to do nothing but work for the next four. I never want to be a workaholic, and I've no desire to practice being one now.

Clearly, my schoolwork is important. I love being a speechie, even if it is a lot of work. I know that sometimes Jason's going to get to go off and have fun while I'm sitting at my desk, writing yet another draft of my proposal. I know that sometimes I'll get a little bit less sleep, or only run twice in a week, or not get to soak in the tub and read a novel. All of this I know, and can accept. What I'm not going to accept is not seeing my friends, not growing my relationship with Jason, not hanging out with Jacob, not going to church... just because it's a heavy term. Some readings aren't worth it, some assignments can be done quickly, some extra credit can be skipped. The people in my life are just as important to me (moreso!) than this degree. And I believe that I can have both in my life. It's just a question of priorities.

Ela

I should probably be doing something more productive...

2007-09-12T14:30:00.000-06:00

Hey guys,

well, it's 2.30 in the afternoon and my next class doesn't start til 3. There are lots of things I could be doing... working on the voice homework, the aural rehab homework, my thesis, the readings, the voice paper, the aug. com. communication board, the questions for aug. com.... but I thought I'd just chill. I have to be at school til 5.50 today, so I'll savor this little break. :)

My classes are fantastic so far. Aural (re)habilitation is all about working people who are deaf and hard of hearing, and involves loads of guest speakers telling us all about the method that they think is best for that population. There are tons of options available, and it's really interesting to evaluate them for ourselves. This prof also doesn't believe in exams, so instead we turn in a portfolio of homework and answer questions based on it. This is very cool, but also challenging for an Ela. Elas like to leave things til the last minute. Elas do not like to have to keep up on homework on a regular basis. It's going to be good for me, I know... it's just going to be challenging!

Adult Language Disorders II is fantastic! The professor teaches like she's talking to you over coffee. She's incredibly passionate about her material, and that's so contagious. I love it. :) It's also cool because we're talking about cognition, memory, attention - all topics that fascinate me.

Next up is voice and resonance, and it's fabulous, too. The prof has flipped the class around, and we're learning about treatment first, which I love. We spent today watching dyads act out certain therapy techniques, and guessing which was which. Very cool. :)

Then there's fluency (stuttering). The prof is incredible - so organized and knowledgeable. Also, she can imitate any sort of dysfluency on demand, so she's great at teaching via examples. Bummer - she uses pop quizzes, so I have to stay on top of the readings. ;)

Finally, there alternative and augmentative communication, which seems pretty sweet. I have to make a communication board for Megs to use on Friday... that should be fun.

So classes are good, but there's a metric load of work to do, plus my thesis, and my RA-ship. It's incredibly busy, and it's hard to be motivated to work on the evenings/weekends when Jason is off work and I'd prefer to be hanging out with him. Therefore, I've been trying to get everything done on Tuesdays and Thursdays and then Friday afternoons. It's sort of working - I've gotten lots done, but not everything. It doesn't help than unexpected things keep popping up, well, unexpectedly. ;) I'm sure I'll figure it all out eventually. Right now it seems to involve obsessively scheduling using G**gle calendar: "right, Tuesday 8-9 is thesis, 9-10 is reading, 10-11 is homework..." It's a bit exhausting.

My RA-ship is also looking fantastic. Yesterday I was trained on how to analyze a modified barium swallow, and it was so cool!! There are 6 or 8 different things that I have to look for, and it's so neat to watch a swallow in slow motion and to see just how much happens in so few seconds. I actually witnessed nasopharyngeal pentetration yesterday: the client's chewed up cookie wound up sitting on top of his velum/soft palate in the nasal cavity - say it with me now: 'ow.' I'm also digitizing some cassette tapes, and continuing with the AIDS transcription. Busy girl!

Well, it's time for fluency now - catch you later, gators!

Elizabeth

Sleepy!

2007-09-10T19:48:00.000-06:00

Hi guys,

man, I'd forgotten how tiring sitting in a chair and learning all day can be. It's a good thing our classes are interesting, or else I'd be doomed. ;) The hard part of being in class from 8-5 is the urge to boredom eat. Today I packed a lunch heavy in fruit and granola bars, so I could just sort of munch all day. Mmm, munching. I had a plucot (plum crossed with an apricot), and its sticker said it was a 'dinosaur egg.' It was actually quite apt, as the fruit is a mottled red and green, and could quite easily be the offspring of a terrible lizard!

Truly, my classes are fantastic so far. Very interesting, and only one textbook that says silly things like:

"We often start out by asking our clients if they are ventriloquists. When they inevitably answer 'no,' we say 'you should try it - you hardly open your mouth when you speak!'"

I'm totally pooped, so I'll have to tell you more about the classes later. Mostly, I just wanted to show you what I've been up to. Jason's teaching me to sculpt with polymer clay, and I wanted to show you project #2. My first creation was a purple bug that I gave to Megs, and I have no photos of it. Suffice it to say that he was a little rougher than this one. I also have a third in the works, but it's not quite finished yet.

Without further ado, I give you: Baby and Frog. Artist: Elizabeth Huebert. Medium: Polymer clay. Date: September 9, 2007.

Hope you all are having a good week so far!

Ela

Back, Back in the Grad School Groove

2007-09-06T13:12:00.000-06:00

Hi friends!

Well, it's September 6, and that means that I've officially completed Day One of the last semester of classes for my Master's. Very exciting. :) The first day went well (even if it was a little long): great professors, interesting courses, and of course, sitting next to Megs.

Our schedule is roughly 8-6 Mondays and Wednesdays, and 8-12 Fridays. Tuesdays and Thursdays are reserved for clinic (practicum). 8-6 (5.30, really, since Dr. C let us out early!) was a long day for a first day. I hate change, this semester is looking busy, and I was tired. When I went to Jason's for dinner, I cried the whole time I did the dishes.

"Ela! What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing," I snivelled, dripping tears into the sink. "I'm just tired and overwhelmed and there's no way I'm going to be able to do everything this semester. There are projects and papers and assignments and my thesis and my RAship and I want to work part-time since I don't have to do clinic til January."

Watching me cry still, Jason asked "are you sure that you want to do this? I mean, if you honestly think that you can't manage it?"

I sort of laughed through my tears. "My Master's? Am I sure I want to do my Master's? Of course I'm sure! I'll be fine tomorrow, I'm just overwhelmed and overtired tonight."

"Well, Ela, you know that you have Tuesdays and Thursdays and Friday afternoons to do your homework, so if you just manage your time..."

I started crying harder. "Jason! I'm too tired to be rational right now. I just need to feel overwhelmed tonight, Ok?"

"Well, Ok, but I don't understand why you would CHOOSE to be out of control!"

I dropped the spoon I was washing back into the sink and started to bawl. I went and sat in the bedroom on the floor with my head on my knees and sobbed. Jason figured it out quickly. He sat down next to me, put his arms around, and said nothing. :)

Sure enough, when I got up this morning I was feeling wide awake and ready to tackle the world. I went and bought my last few books, organized my student loan, and got my UPass. That was followed by organizing my bookshelf, getting the semester's binders ready, arranging a meeting with my RA supervisor, and reading an article and outlining its subtitles for a group project meeting tomorrow. I am feeling confident about this term, and am looking forward to it!

This afternoon I want to spend about an hour on my thesis and get started on the term's reading. I was all set to only do the vital ones, but Megs has resolved to do all of them. Can't let her be the only one who does! We'll see if I can keep on top of them. ;)

I also have a job interview tomorrow at 1.30. If you're thinking of me, you could pray. :) It's an RAship that's 12 hours week working on a knowledge mobilization project. The opportunity sounds fantastic, so I'm hoping the interview will go well.

Also exciting is that I obtained a 3hr/wk. RAship through the department. I'm back with Dr. R at COMPRU. As I volunteered there over the summer, I've actually been with them for eight months, and have spent all of that time doing transcription. I go in, I put on head phones, and I write down the 50 words and 20 sentences. I score these for intelligibilty, and file them. I like the job because it's a nice balance of mindlessness (the job isn't difficult) and focus (you have to pay attention or you'll screw it up). As much as I like it, eight months is a long time. :) I asked Dr. R if that's what I would be continuing with, and yes, it is. HOWEVER - I get to split my time between transcription and analyzing modified barium swallows!! This is watching a video x-ray of a person swallowing radioactive barium in order to determine if there are any abnormalities in the swallow (e.g., delay or misdirection). This is so cool. I'm so excited! Dysphagia (problems in swallowing) is an area that fascinates me, and this is a fabulous opportunity for me. Yay!

Well, my 10 minute break is up - it must be time to start reading. I'll catch you all later!

Love,
Elizabeth

Alas poor August - I knew it well

2007-09-02T23:33:00.000-06:00

Hi friends,

I cannot believe that August is over. Just can't. In fact, I refuse. :) In my mind it is going to be August 31 for at least another week or two.

The past week has been very enjoyable, and the weekend's been even better. On Friday, Jason and I had a lazy evening, bumming around and playing World of Warcraft. Yes, I have been geekified: Jason's got me into the WoW thing. I'm still pretty much only interested in playing if he's playing (we play side-by-side). We'll know I'm REALLY far gone when I start playing alone. :D Yesterday we took Jacob to the Telus World of Science, and I was really impressed with how great the exhibits were. They have a robotics centre (sadly, it was closed when we got there) where you can actually program a small robot to perform a rescue mission on Mars (3D terrains built on tabletops). We're planning to go back so we can try that out. They also had a station where you could build Lego cars and race them. Jason and Jake really got a kick out of that! Jake built a little car that was pretty much unbeatable: true boy's bragging rights. Today, Jason and Kathie and Brandon and I played Cranium Pop 5, Settlers of Catan: Cities and Knights, and Settlers of the Stone Age. I liked Pop 5 best, as it's something I'm actually good at. I totally got Jason to guess "Lance Armstrong" by pretending to ride my bike across the room. :) The best bit was when Kathie was trying to get Brandon to guess Shrinky Dinks by curling up into a teeny ball and then frantically pointing at her crotch. It was hysterical!

School starts Wednesday, and I'm so not ready to go back. I'm considering going to ogle school supplies tomorrow or Tuesday in order to psych myself up. Nothing like some new post-its and sharpies to get into the "let's learn!" mode. This term we have: Alternative/Augmentative Communication (e.g., sign language, voice production software), Voice and Resonance (an area of relative expertise for me, given that my thesis is based on resonance disorders), Fluency (stuttering/stammering treatment), Adult Language Disorders II (which absolutely HAS to be better than ALD I, which was an absolute WASTE of tuition), and Aural Rehabilitaion (about which I know absolutely nothing, except that it's taught by a fantastic prof). I'm pretty interested in all my classes, and there are no surprise profs this term, so it should be good. Actually, typing that all up has kind of piqued my interest again... maybe Wednesday won't be so bad?

Some of you have been asking about my interview at DriveABLE. It went very well, and it seems that I would be an excellent fit there. My understanding is that when hours become available, they will be in touch with me about training. The small issue is that they're hiring pre-emptively: they're currently able to handle the volume of assessments that they have. They have good reason to expect an increase beyond their capacity at some point in time in September/October, but they can't be sure when, and they can't be sure by how much. Therefore, they're simply not in a position to guarantee a start date or weekly hours. They were very open and up-front about this, which I really appreciated. I'd very much like to work there, so we're kind of at a 'wait-and-see' point in the process. In the interim I've also applied for a GAP (graduate assistantship program, I would be a research assistant or a teaching assistant, as I was at Compru in the winter term) and another research assistantship that's a bit more intense (12 hours a week, lots of research and writing about community research and knowledge mobilization, both topics that interest me). And for both of those positions, it's still 'wait-and-see.' Guess what I'm doing these days? Yeah. Waiting-and-seeing. :D

That's my news! Not much else to report, I'm afraid. Hope all's well with you.

Love ya,
Elizabeth

Sneaky Stress

2007-08-25T22:52:00.000-06:00

Hi guys,

Ever notice how stress can sneak up on a girl? Y'know - you trundle along, thinking everything's all good, you're on your month off, life is sweet... then you send a cover letter with two colours of font in it (d'Oh), lose your wallet (find it again, thank goodness), stick the wrong stickers on the new tokens for Settlers of Catan, Cities and Knights (cry in the bathroom), and burn your finger on a PopTart. That's when you realize that, despite your month off's best efforts, you're stressed anyway.

Guess where I'm at? Yeah. Stressed. Worried about school starting, finding a part-time job, writing my prospectus, fitting everything into a new schedule.... It's kind of been eating away at me over the last week or so, and I didn't really realize it til today. I guess that I need to get organized, even though it's my time off. Tomorrow afternoon I plan to sit down and map out a schedule for this week, in order to feel that I'm making productive use of my time. I'm hoping to accomplish two things with this: 1) actually get stuff done (e.g., going into the lab, writing my thesis), and 2) actually relax during my time off. We'll see. :)

Today was a pleasant day, even if I DID cry over putting the wrong stickers on the Settlers' tokens. ;) Jason and I met up with Kathie and Brandon at an auction house, to check out the goodies. Katie and Jason got bored before the auctioneer made it around to the stuff Brandon was semi-interested in, so we picked up what we'd purchased (K&B: ramen noodles, Cheezies and apple juice - a well rounded meal!; Jason: 3 pots for $12.50!) and headed out. J. and I went to West Ed to pick up Cities and Knights, and spent close to an hour just trying to find a parking spot. The mall was stupid busy! I guess that's what happens when it's back-to-school time and the weather is awful. :) We finally got our game, and headed of to play with K. and B. The game was pretty frustrating for me at first, because I didn't understand any of its subtleties. About 2/3 of the way through it started making sense, and I really started to enjoy it. It's more complex than Settlers, and also longer, both of which combine to mean that it's easier to catch up if you fall behind. I'm excited to play again - I think that I can do a lot better next time.

Tomorrow I'm teaching Jr. Church - it's all about Noah, so I think we're going to build an ark out of chairs and pretend to be animals, and then I think it might be a lazy afternoon. Jason's encouraging me to explore sculpting, since I enjoy baking bread so much (I love manipulating the dough!), so maybe I'll give that a shot. His flat is lacking a backgammon board, so he said that if I made the pieces, he would make the board. I think it's a nice idea for a first attempt for me - something simple, and fairly craft-like (as opposed to art-like). We'll see how it goes.

And to end this post, a semi-funny, semi-painful story. (The best kind, really!)

Those Bloody WingDings

Wednesday evening, about 7 o'clock, Jason and I are hungry.

"The Stonehouse does Wing Wednesday, hun," I say. "Why don't we go there?"

Jason readily agrees, and we head off to the pub. Once there, we take a couple stools at the bar, as the tables are all full, order a couple of pints, and start chatting with the bar staff. After glancing over the wing section on the menu, we place our order.

"We'd like an order of the Greek wings, an order of the Cajun Salt and Pepper, and an order of your WingDing hot wings," Jason says.

The bartender raises an eyebrow. "The WingDing hot wings?" he asks. "You sure about that? They're REALLY hot."

"That's fine," Jason shrugs. He eats hot foods all the time, and is rarely phased by anything a restaurant refers to as being 'really spicy.'

Grinning, the waiter replies "Alright then, I'll bring you the waiver to sign."

Jason and I both laugh, but it's cut short when the waiter lays a two-page waiver form on the bar in front of us. It turns out that if a person can eat all 12 hot wings in a reasonable amount of time they'll win free wings the next time, and a chance at winning a hundred bucks.

"Might as well give it a shot," Jason says as he signs his name. I mostly ignore him as I read the warnings about death, doom, and diarrhea at the foot of page one.

The waiter hustles off to shout in our order, and the two regulars on the stools next to us begin throwing their two cents in.

"They are REALLY hot," the first man says. "I only made it through two before I had to give up."

"Whatever you do, DON'T touch your eyes after eating 'em" chimes in the second man.

"Yeah! That's fer damn sure," the first one replies. He pauses, then adds "And wash yer hands BEFORE you take a leak. Learned that one the hard way." He nods sagely, then takes another swig of his beer.

Not too much later, our wings appear. Jason grabs his first WingDing, and chows down.

"How is it," I ask.

"Not bad," he says. "All heat and no flavor - just like I suspected."

"Can you finish them all?" the bartender asks.

"Yeah, no problem."

Two more wings in and the tears are running down Jason's face. I've seen him eat a lot of spicy food before, but I've never seen him cry doing it.

"You Ok, hun?" I ask.

"Yeah, but these are THE spiciest wings I've ever had. They don't taste like anything though - they're just HOT. I wonder if they're seasoned with something synthetic."

I keep eating my wings (the more ordinary ones), and am disappointed with how flavorless they are. I glance over again at Jason, tears streaming now, looking somewhat ashen.

"Jason?" I ask. "You Ok?"

"I can't eat anymore," he says, pushing the plate away. "I'm feeling really sick."

He gets up and heads for the washroom. The bartender clears the plate away, and returns to ask "Do you think he'd like a glass of milk?"

"He's lactose intolerant," I reply. "A glass of milk would only make things worse."

Jason returns, looking a bit better, but still not so good. "The heat didn't get to me," he says. "It's just that whatever's in them is really making my stomach rise."

We finished up our regular wings and headed for the door. About a block into our 4 block walk, Jason suddenly stops, grabbing his stomach.

"I thought I was feeling better," he gasped, "but suddenly I feel awful. How far to your place?"

"Just a few more blocks," I say, worried.

We hurry on. Another block into the walk, and Jason drops to his alongside the grass. "I think I'm going to be sick," he says, turning an awful shade of puce. He kneels there, heaving, for a moment or two, before he staggers to his feet.

"I can't do it. I feel awful, but I can't be sick."

We hurry along for another block, when Jason suddenly stops again. "How much further to your place?" he asks.

"Just another block, sweetie. C'mon, let's hurry."

Halfway through the last block, Jason suddenly gasps out, "Ela, will you still love me if I s**t my pants?"

I pause, think about it for a moment, and say "Yes, Jason. I will still love you, EVEN if you s**t your pants. But there's only 1/2 a block left - you can make it!"

In the end, we DID make it back to the condo in time, and poor Jason spent a very agonizing evening being unable to either throw up or to be tormented by Montezuma's Revenge. Instead, he got to lay perfectly still and drink nothing. The slightest movement or the smallest beverage made his stomach explode into agonies of pain. Eventually able to sleep, he awoke the next morning feeling much better, if not 100%.

Watch out for the WingDings.

Ela

Ela's Soapbox Presents: The Language of Touch

2007-08-21T13:06:00.000-06:00

Way back on July 4 I wrote a post about touch in today's society. I promised another post regarding the language of touch... and here it is.

The Language of Touch

It's becoming common knowledge that our spoken words convey only 7% of the message that we communicate when we're talking to someone in person. The other 93% of the information is conveyed through our posture, body language, and tone of voice. It's why communicating via email or instant messaging is so fraught with danger - you're missing out on a LOT of information, and misunderstandings are rampant.

Clearly, humans do a lot of non-verbal communicating. Usually we think of tone of voice and body language as examples. I believe that a third category, or perhaps a subcategory of body language, is touch. As in, touching others. The most obvious examples of this are mothers with young children (you can tell just by how they hold their infants how much they love them) and people in dating relationships (everyone recognizes that little kiss on the forehead as the universal symbol for "I have tender feelings for you"). What's unfortunate is that communicating through touch seems to be limited to these two areas.

With regards to mothers and children, this is an area that's changing. It's much more common today to see men being physically affectionate with their young children. I think that this is fantastic. Our physical dads automatically create ideas within us about what our heavenly father is like - and I am utterly convinced that God wants to hug us. :) What's sad is that physical touch within many families (not all, I know) tends to become vastly reduced as the children reach puberty. I think that this is a set-up for disaster: teens no longer have any of their touch needs met at home, touch isn't encouraged in platonic relationships, so they seek it out in romantic relationships. What if we continued to tell our children that we loved them via touch even after they hit adolescence? What changes could that trigger?

And of course we 'tell' our significant others that we love them through touch all the time. The aforementioned kiss on the forehead, holding hands, frequent hugs. My question: why are these things limited to romantic relationships? What's wrong with pulling an "Anne of Green Gables" and walking hand-in-hand with a friend? (Ok, homophobic men - I know what you're thinking. But how about man-hugs? [You know - where you stand two feet apart and sort of awkwardly pat each others shoulders.] Or a gentle punch in the shoulder?? *grin* Or even just an old-school handshake?)

I can hear voices yelling at me "why do we need to use touch? I tell my friends and family that they matter to me by using words!" Please don't misunderstand me: words are important. I'm a speechie, after all! It's just that words don't need to be advocated for - people use those quite a bit. :) The problem with never using touch with people who aren't children or your significant other is that you lose the habit of it. The less you touch them, the more awkward it becomes to do so later on. This is fine while things are good, while words are adequate for the situations you're in. But what happens when things are in a worse place?

What do you say to someone who has lost someone whom they love? What words do you offer to a person struggling with mental illness? What do you tell your friend whose life is falling apart? I don't know about all of you, but when I'm upset, the last thing that I want is a string of meaningless platitudes: "It's alright, everything will be Ok, it'll all work out...." Sure, maybe everything will work out - but RIGHT NOW it sucks. RIGHT NOW I'm sad, and I'm hurting. I want you to be here with me RIGHT NOW, not in the future when everything's hypothetically all better (God forbid it not get better - then what would we do??). You see where I'm heading, right?

When your friend needs you RIGHT NOW and there are no words to offer to her, you can hold her hand, hug her, hold her while she weeps. Touch lets you communicate that you love her, support her, care for her, and will help to bear her burdens. All of that without having to whisper one pointless statement about how everything will be so much better later on. And it is so much easier to provide this kind of touch when you've been practicing it all along. You can communicate other things through touch, too: support, contentment, joy. It's a whole 'nother language!

While I've been very pro-touch in this little diatribe, I do want to offer up a word of caution. Touch is a language that we all speak, but we all speak different 'dialects.' What's just a hug to me ("I like hanging out with you, my friend") might be a message of "I'd like you to ask me out on a date" to a certain man. Standing close to a friend to show support might be interpreted as you being overbearing and pushy. Touch is a language that is deeply emotional, so miscommunications have the potential to be especially damaging. Using verbal support can help keep you 'speaking clearly' in touch. (E.g., "I'm a hugger - I hug ALL of my friends!") The other thing you should use your words for is 'checking.' Y'know - making sure the person you're touching is Ok with it. Some people are just NOT touchers, and you're just going to make them grumpy if you're all over them. Checking is a good idea: "Hey, I'm a hugger. I hug all of my friends, usually - is it Ok if I hug you??"

Provided that scaffold your touch with words, I think that you can share deeper, more emotionally charged messages with your friends and family if you speak to them via touch. Go ahead - reach out and touch someone. ;)

Love,
Elizabeth

Exciting

2007-08-20T16:19:00.000-06:00

Hi guys,

I heard back from DriveABLE today, and am going in for interview on Friday morning at 10 (the delay was due to their HR woman being on holiday). If you have a moment, you might say a little prayer that I'll be calm and not chatter their heads off. :D

I had a lovely birthday last week, with lots of birthday greetings from friends (yay for Facebook), time spent with family, and a trip to the horse races with Jason. "Dover! Move yer bloomin' arse!" We made $3. I won't tell you how much we lost. ;) A good time was had by all! Last night we had dinner with his mum and grandparents, which was lovely. His granny and grandfather gave me Godiva chocolates as a gift... and I'm doing a TERRIBLE job of rationing them out.

Given my inability to hold onto chocolate, I went out for a run this morning. My endurance isn't as good as it was, but I managed to get in a good thirty minutes, so I'm feeling pretty fantastic. I'm planning to go again tomorrow - provided my legs don't hurt too much. * grin *

I'm off to turn on the oven and throw in a roast. We're having it with mashed potatoes and green beans/spinach sauteed with garlic. Nummers.

Love ya,
Ela

Job Love

2007-08-14T22:39:00.000-06:00

Hi guys!

I thought that it was high time for some lighter fare, so this evening I'm going to share some stories from current research assistantship with you.

Right now I'm working a few hours a week in the lab digitizing audio clips from old VHS tapes. This involves finding the right child on the tape, and going through about 20 minutes of a session to 'cut out' about 20 individual words. These words are then being analyzed by a post doc student down in Texas; she's looking at vowel errors in children with southern accents. (Interesting aside: for a long time it was assumed that children with speech impediments only had problems with consonants. This is patently untrue, but there were no measures available to assess vowel errors. A woman in our department [who at that time was working down in Texas] developed one of the first tests for vowel errors. Very cool!)

So I sit in front of a computer, with a TV off to my right, and watch cute little kids with southern accents name pictures of objects (e.g., 'hat' 'boy' 'couch'). And while I sit there, I giggle madly. It's just too darn cute. Examples to follow!

The clinician and the child were looking at a picture with a bowl of popcorn and a bowl of peanuts in it.

"What's this?" asked the clinician.
"Popcorn," replied the child.
"And this?"
"Peanuts."
"Very good!" the clinician responded.
"I said 'penis'!" the child giggled.
The clinician was momentarily stunned, then turned the page and pointed to a cake, asking "what's this?"

Another clinician and another child were looking at a picture of a toy airplane together.

"What's this?" asked the clinician.
"A plane," the child answered.
"Can you tell me the big name for it?" the clinician queried.
"A PLANE," the child yelled.

Yet another clinician and another child were looking at a picture of a barn surrounded by common farm animals (a horse, a cow, and a pig). The clinician was trying to get the child to name the cow.

"What's this?" the clinician questioned.
"Ummm..." hemmed the child.
"We get milk from it," prompted the clinician.
"Umm..." the little girl hawed.
"It goes 'moo...'"
"It's a MOOSE!" bellowed the girl.

Now, for this last one, you must picture an adorable little black girl, about four years old. She's a non-rhotic speaker: she drops her 'r's. She sounds a little bit like she's from Boston ('pahk the cah in the garahge') but more southern. She was looking at a picture of a birthday cake with the clinician, and was excitedly telling the adult all about her own birthday the week before:

"I had a bethday pahty at Chuckeh Cheese!"

Hope you enjoyed a peek into my RAship!

Love,
Ela

insert something witty here

2007-08-09T10:45:00.000-06:00

Hi guys,

I was right in thinking that I'd have more time to blog now that clinic is done. Unfortunately, I don't seem to have anything to say. :) I figured it was about time to dust off the keyboard, though, so here I am.

My break hasn't really sunk in yet. I've been trying to get up in the mornings and go into the lab for a couple hours, as well as to work on my prospectus. I've had some success with this, but am by no means perfect. :) There have also been a bunch of little things that have popped up - family visiting, errands to run, phone calls to make... y'know, the stuff that just eats up time.

I suppose the most salient thing that's happened recently is that Jason (who was previously called Robert in this blog, but will now be referred to by his real name) and I hit a bump in the road. The kind of bump that forces the road to fork: find a middle ground or end things. After a really tough couple days where I'm not sure either one of us felt like we were being heard and miscommunications abounded (something that's unusual for the two us), we managed to actually hear what the other was saying, and to start working our way forward. It was a terrifying experience, to be honest. I love Jason very much, and facing the fact that just loving him might not be enough to hold our relationship together was an incredibly difficult experience. However, some long, tough conversations and some hard work later, we're back on track, planning a future together.

The whole situation with Jason forced me into a place where I had to evaluate some of my religious beliefs in order to determine why I believed them. Growing up in a Christian community means that I take a lot of things 'on faith,' and don't really investigate them for myself. Sorting out what I believe and why was challenging, and it brought me face to face with the fact that there are a lot of issues where there are just no black and white answers. I happen to like black and white answers. I might not like what they entail, but at least I always know where things stand. It was frightening for me to realize that I had to reason my through my beliefs, using whatever biblical guidance was available, but ultimately make up my own mind. I'm not convinced that I fully understand my own beliefs at this point, but I'm certainly farther along than I've ever been before. What I still hold to be one of the main pillars of my beliefs is the necessity of 'keeping people.' This entails making sure that you are doing what is best for those around you, and not just for yourself.

Keeping people can be easy at times. When things are good, when you're all headed in the same direction, it's easy to think about those you're close to. But when you start struggling, when you're heading down different paths, it becomes so, so easy to accidentally hurt someone. I realize that I'm a spoilt, self-centred woman in many ways, and I am very, very good at inadvertently hurting those around me. I believe that God is using the past couple weeks as a lesson to me about how thoughtlessness can cause a lot of pain to the people that I care about. I think those actions are some of the hardest for me to step up and take ownership of... I feel that, since it was accidental, I should be 'off the hook.' That might be nice, but it's sure not going to resolve anything. I'm learning that I'm responsible for what I do - intentional or accidental. And that therefore, I need to be more thoughtful of those around me. Growth like this isn't necessarily easy, or fun, but I like who I am when I'm growing. It's good to know that I won't keep making the same mistakes over and over, and that I'm capable of moving beyond this. Just give me time!

And that's it for now... I'm meeting Al for lunch, then dropping some stuff off at Jason's work, then hanging out with Michael. Busy busy!!

Love,
ela

So much with the busy...

2007-07-27T09:53:00.000-06:00

Hi all,

apologies for the lack of posts - unfortunately the last 3 weeks have been totally insane, and I just haven't had time to sit down and write anything. Today's post won't be anything brilliant... just a bit of a catch up. :)

Today is the last day of clinic. This summer we had clinic plus two classes: Assessment and Dysphagia (disorders of swallowing). Assessment was pretty closely integrated into our clinic process, so it wasn't so noticeable. Dysphagia was totally independent of clinic, and it was tough. I was so unmotivated to learn that I found it hard to pay attention in class. I wound up teaching myself most of the material the weekend before the final. :) Luckily, that works for me! And dysphagia is a disorder area I'd like to spend at least some time working in some day, so I'm glad I got something out of the class.

Clinic itself was a weird experience. The 4 45-minute sessions a week were great. I loved being with clients: both working with them and just getting to know them. The rest of the time was more challenging. There was so much group work, and so many overlapping roles with no clear delineation. There was a lot of paperwork, something I really don't mind working on solo, but something that is very challenging to try and complete with another person. Honestly, who writes reports with two people sitting at one computer? Yet this is how our clinic is structured in many ways, and I found it really challenging. Clinic was also hard because everyone is exhausted from the last 2 semesters of school. Tempers are shorter, endurance is a joke, and minor obstacles become frustrating hurdles to leap. If I could make one recommendation to the program, it would be that they give use TWO weeks in between winter and spring term, and only four weeks between summer and fall.

What makes all of the above worthwhile is the little girl who used to be about 25% intelligible, and is now closer to 55%. Her mum is noticing that strangers understand the little girl better, and the little girl isn't giving up so easily when people don't understand. That's pretty rewarding. And don't forget the older gentleman, unable to write more than a single word in May, who is now writing 3 word phrase to communicate his ideas. He's also added 4 words to his spoken repertoire, and his daughter reports that he's much more confident about trying to get his ideas across. That's pretty rewarding, too.

Other things sort of ground to a halt during clinic. My thesis, while not totally stalling out, certainly slowed in its progress. Luckily I've got fantastic supervisors, and they've kept me working on it a bit at a time, so I've got somewhere to go. My plan is to finish the prospectus this August - we'll see how it goes.

I basically quit running for a couple months there, which was a terrible choice. If anything, I should have been running more, to try and better cope with the stress. Instead, I chose to let the long days at school, the homework and the session planning, and my Robert get in the way. :) Now that clinic's winding down, I've had some extra time, and I've tied on my runners twice this week. It's pretty sad how slow I've gotten, and how low my endurance is, but I'm feeling really, REALLY good about getting out there and going. And with the month of August off, I see no reason that I won't be able to re-establish my runs as habit. Rob's also going to pick up a tennis racket, so we can play together. :) He's more into dangerous things, like rollerblading and mountain biking, so we're working on finding things that both of us enjoy that we could do together. So far, we've got tennis. ;)

Tomorrow is Meg's and my shared birthday party. Her birthday was yesterday, and mine's not til August, but she's going away to Africa for the whole month, so now seemed a good time to celebrate. I'm quite excited - she's hosting a semi-formal afternoon of desserts. I think it's going to be wonderful! The only thing is that I actually need a dessert, and baking is not something I'm feeling up for. I may have to check out a couple of the bakeries in the neighborhood, and see what I can find. :)

I applied for a part-time position, and I should hear back next week. The woman I applied to has actually already sent me an email, but it just said that she was heading out on vacation, and would be in touch. The company is called DriveABLE, and they assess people with cognitively impairing medical conditions. These impairments may or may not render someone unfit to drive, and adults suffering from these conditions need to be screened for whether or not they are safe to be on the road. The job that I applied for is one in which I would do the in-office testing. I'm quite nicely qualified for the position, as it requires assisting adults (mostly seniors) in demonstrating their abilities, even if they're language impaired. We'll see what happens, I guess. :)

And that's all that's new at the moment. I'll try and post a bit more regularly once I've got a bit more time. :)

Love you,
Elizabeth

Ugh, Communication

2007-07-06T18:01:00.000-06:00

I may be all about the talking, but I'm so over this communicating business. ;) And for those of you who think that's not possible, I'd like to share a few Ela-style definitions with you.

In the world of rehabilitation medicine... Ok, just speech pathology (one of our profs asked a professor in the physical therapy dep't to differentiate these terms, and she couldn't). Anyways. In the world of speech language pathology, linguistics, and some psychology the terms 'speech,' 'language,' and 'communication' all denote different things. Crazy, I know. Let's begin, shall we?

Speech. Speech is the actual, physical mechanism of creating words using your lungs, your larynx, your mouth, and your nose. It is the airstream that is filtered through your vocal folds, mouth and nose.

Language. Language is a little bit more nebulous than speech is. It's all of the planning that happens before the muscles in your torso, neck and head work together to create the speech. Language includes things like grammar/syntax and vocabulary. If you create a sentence that is correct in your head, but don't actually say it out loud, that's language. :) Therefore, there are a variety of ways to use language. For example, writing uses language. So does sign (as in, sign language). Language does not require speech. It does, however, require symbols. So pointing up at the sky to communicate the message of 'up' is not language. That's not a symbol. Assigning arbitrary sounds to an idea is language. Assigning arbitrary scribbles that we call letters to an idea is language. Language must also be neoproductive. It has to allow to communicate an unlimited number of messages.

Communication. Communication is very cool. It doesn't require speech OR language. Infants are very effective communicators - and their tongues completely fill their mouths! How many of us have seen mums listen to their kids cry and say "oh, they're Ok. That's the hungry cry, not the hurt cry." Crying isn't speech. It isn't language. But it's primitive communication (I say primitive because it lacks intention - it's unlikely your 4 month old is thinking "hm, I'm hungry. I shall cry at 800 Hz and 65 dB SPL in order to indicate this). It's an oft quoted tidbit that the words we say make up only 7% of what our listeners hear. The other 93% comes from tone of voice, facial expression, and body language. This is why email and instant messenger can cause so many issues - you can't tell how the person is saying their message.

Anyhoo. I'm all about speech, and I really love language. But lately this communication business has been making me CRAZY!! The automatic assumption is that someone who talks a lot will be good at having difficult conversations. I completely disagree! It's obviously a possibility, but I could talk the hind leg off a hippo, and I stink at having to talk about the serious stuff. :) This is something I'm improving at, though, especially Robert is an excellent communicator, and is really encouraging me to learn to apply that which I already know (the counselling portion of my assessment class taught me a lot of skills).

Wednesday evening both Robert and I were a bit frustrated about a few different things, and my response was to be very quiet and to kind of avoid him. He was having none of that. I was eventually sat down and given a stern talking to about what makes relationships work. :) We managed to talk through most of the things that were bothering us, which was great, if tough for me. All communication-ed out, I was hoping for a quiet-ish Thursday. Instead, my clinical educator and I had a meeting, in which she expressed concern about how quiet I had been in meetings recently. I explained that I've been very tired recently, and that while I'm processing all of the information, I just wasn't sharing very much. She smiled, and informed me that she's the same way. When she gets tired, she gets quiet.

"However," she added "I don't think that your team understands where you're at. I think you need to sit down and communicate with them about how you work, and explain where you're at."

*headdesk*

See? See what I mean?? More communication! :D I am communication-ed out. I did actually sit down with my team and talk with them about how I work (I wish we'd do personality colours in our program. Then I could just say "when I'm tired, I go green."*). They were very pleased that I shared with them; I suspect they thought I was angry or some such thing.

This summer is definitely one of professional growth for me. I now know how to design an assessment, write an assessment plan, plan treatment, plan sessions, take data, and write treatment reports. I'm developing an arsenal of clinical skills on how to shape sounds, support conversation, and drill practice. And all of this is valuable. But all of it pales in comparison to the personal growth that I'm achieving through being pushed to communicate effectively. It might be exhausting, and it damn well might be frustrating, but it is so worth it.

Love you,
E.

Hold Me

2007-07-04T11:28:00.000-06:00

I saw this cartoon this morning, and thought that it was just so sweet. And also true. And it perhaps this truth that leads me to my soapbox:

Touch in Today's Society

This is another one of those things that Megs and I talk about a lot. Our basic argument is this: People need touch. Our society says that touch is weird or wrong unless it is contained within a romantic relationship. People therefore struggle to meet their touch needs in a healthy way, and all kinds of unhealthy coping mechanisms ensue.

I firmly believe that people connect with each other on a deeper level when touch is incorporated. And I'm not talking about sitting in each other's laps, or being wrapped around each other like stripes on a candy cane. I'm thinking of an arm around the shoulders, a hand on the knee, holding hands. It brings the physical sensory portion of the brain into the interaction, and also integrates some of the more primitive portions of the brain. I also believe that it's harder to lie when you're physically being gentle with someone. Research indicates that babies who aren't touched fail to thrive - why would we as adults be so terribly different?

Yet despite this need for touch, our society has rendered touch taboo - unless of course you're romantically involved with the person. I suspect that some of this restrictiveness stems from the idea that touch is a slippery slope - once you start touching someone, and become comfortable with it, it's easier to touch more and in more personal ways. I respect the idea that we probably shouldn't encourage our teenage girls to be overly touch-friendly with their teenage boy friends. However. I firmly believe that this is a vicious cycle. We say 'don't touch, unless you're dating.' Then when they start dating, they start touching and find out that it feels good to have those needs met. There's nowhere else that's permissible to meet those needs, so they just keep on touching with whomever they're dating.

How easy is it to break up with someone who isn't right for you, but is the only person who is meeting your touch needs? How easy is it to walk away from the one person you feel a physical connection with, even if they emotionally abuse you? You have needs that you desperately want to meet, society says that there is one place to meet it, that place isn't healthy. Now what?

I believe that we can break this cycle. Beyond that, I think that as Christians we are called to break it. To the best of my knowledge, the majority of Jesus' healings involved him touching the people he healed. And let's be clear: I'm not advocating for sexual touch. What I am advocating for is the de-sexualization of certain kinds of touching: holding hands, hugging, and to some extent, cuddling/close sitting. It's my belief that if we can get these kinds of touches from people in a non-sexual way, we won't be so desperate to get them from a romantic partner. And I think that this is possible. With their permission, touch your friends. Touch your family. Be known as a 'touchy-feely' person. Be careful that you're not leading anyone on (goodness knows that it is a risk), but show the people in your life that you're Ok with touching even if you aren't dating.

So go ahead - hug someone today. And please: feel free to hold me.

Love,
Ela

Next time on Ela's Soapbox: The Language of Touch

Selective Eaters...

2007-06-27T09:44:00.000-06:00

"Oh look, a picture of peas! Oh you looked at it! You looked at it and you didn't throw up! High five. "

"Look at this bowl of peas. You don't have to eat them. Just look at them. Hm. They're green. And round. I bet they'd roll if you put them on the table. Good job! You touched them without vomiting! High five."

"Look at this bowl of peas. You don't have to eat them, just look. I wonder what they feel like. Hey you touched them! Good work. Can you squish them? Can you put those squished ones on your cheeks? Ooh, good work. Here's a kleenex and a glass of water. Can you kiss those peas? You can wipe them off if you're feeling sick. You kissed the peas! High give."

And people wonder why speech pathologists are a little quirky. You would be to if the above conversation was a part of your daily life, as it is for the guest lecturer we had yesterday. :)

There's a month left in clinic, and as much as I've enjoyed it, I'm ready to be done. I'm at the point of tired now where I fall asleep on the LRT, I spill slurpees on my laptop (luckily Dexter is Ok), and I break glasses (fortunately I was holding it in a tea towel, so I didn't cut myself). Luckily this weekend is going to be very relaxing. We're definitely going out to the cabin (Robert, Aaron, Megs and myself) to be lazy and play games for most of the weekend. On Monday we're going to go to the Stampede finals, which should be very fun. Chris might meet us there, which would also be cool. I like it when my worlds collide a bit, and friends meet family meet boyfriends, etc. :)

I'm doing my solo adult session today, which means that I'm the only person in the room with my client. I'm feeling pretty good about what I've got planned, if a teensy bit nervous because I'm trying a trivia activity that we've never done before. However, if it doesn't go well, we can always just do some more oral-motor exercises instead. Back up plans are very comforting. :)

That's all that's new, friends.

Love,
Ela

Super Secret Sacks!

2007-06-25T12:44:00.000-06:00

This week we're working on the /s/ sound, and so today we're having super secret sacks! These are paper bags filled with paper, and a small /s/ object (e.g., sock, sun, etc.). I was hoping to use shredded paper from the office, but they actually ship their shredding out. So I got creative, and stuffed the bags with toilet paper. :) Our client gets to dig through, find the object, name it, and place it in its spot on a sheet of paper. Some of the objects are extra fun. There's a sucker, a soother (the sour candy kind!), and a sour coke bottle candy. Once she's found all of the objects, and put them in their places, she gets to tell me "silly sentences," and I'll act them out. For example, "put Sam in the sock!" I think it's going to be fun.

I can't quite believe that it's Monday morning already. Friday afternoon, I went to Megs' for dinner, and on the bus there I commented that it felt like the weekend was already going by too quickly. Boy was I ever right. Megs' and I ate dinner (curry - so good!), baked brownies, and watched the rest of Firefly. Then on Saturday, Robert and I went out to his grandparents' cabin at the lake to help them get it ready for the summer. Robert was fixing a bunch of the plumbing, so I mopped up after him. :) Sadly, the plumbing wasn't totally finished by the time we left. We met up with Robert's good friend Aaron (who knows my good friend Elly, weird...), and spent the evening playing random word games and laughing hysterically. :) Sunday morning I taught Jr. Church, then Robert, Megs and I went out for lunch together. The waiter at Julio's was very concerned about Robert's choice of "nuclear" salsa... After lunch, Robert and I headed back out to the cabin, where he finished up the plumbing, and I cleaned the bejeebus out of the bathroom. We also got to spend some time visiting with his grandparents, whom I already love. :) We stopped in at my folks' place on our way back to the city, and he got to meet my grandparents. Highlight of the evening? My grandpa informing Robert that I am very precious to him. :)

And then the weekend was over! I can't believe how quickly it went by, and I also can't believe how ready I am for another. Like right now. Fortunately it's the long weekend this time around, and we've got a lazy one planned. Robert, Megs, possibly Aaron and I are all going out to the cabin, and then to the Ponoka Stampede finals. I think it's going to be a little bit more relaxed than this weekend was!! :D

Ooh, funny story. So, we all know that Shakespeare looooooooves Robert. (Apparently, he even likes him more than I do!). Well, Shakespeare has taken to trying to seduce Robert. The other evening, Robert and I were sitting on the living room floor playing crib. Shakes tried to get Robert's attention, but he was in the middle of playing a hand, so he ignored the cat. Shakes then sat down just out of reach. When Robert reached back to pet him finally, Shakes slid just a little further away. He pointedly looked off into the distance, then glance sultrily over his shoulder at Robert, and THEN he stretched out all luxuriously and sensuously. I think it's a good thing Shakes is going back to Al tomorrow... otherwise I think I'd have to fear for my life. After all, I wouldn't put it past a black cat to kill for love. :P

Ela

More Singing!

2007-06-22T11:48:00.001-06:00

My friends are all feeling a titch irritated right now. It seems that somehow, someone got the song "I was made for lovin' you" stuck in their heads. WHO would do a thing like that? WHO would hear a random comment made in the grad lab about lovin' a certain activity, and suddenly belt out:

I was made for lovin' you baby/you were made for lovin' me.

WHO?

Me. Of course. Who else? I think that, in general, there should be more singing. And lately I've been in this wonderful, fantastic mood that leads to much singing. Also happy dancing. And my happy dancing is a sight to behold. Imagine a penguin... bold in her tuxedo, flippered and slightly awkward.
Now imagine that this penguin has some severe hemorrhoids, and an ingrown toenail. But she is joyful! Nevertheless, she is happy and she wishes to DANCE. That's me. Happy dancing! Fantastic. I imagine that the producers of "Canada's Got Talent" will beating my door down any day. I will be the next William Hung!

Anyhoo, that's all that's new. Have happy day!

Cheers,
Elizabeth

Stu, Stanley and Stella

2007-06-18T13:21:00.000-06:00

Hey all!

We're working on s-blends with our pediatric client at the moment. Today, two giraffes (Stanley and Stella) have been stolen, and their friend Stu wants our client to help him find them. It's going to be very fun. :)

As you may have guessed, life continues to be ridiculously busy. Clinic is sort of a steady stream of things to do: sessions to plan, reports to write, materials to make. Now we've switched from our assessment class to our dysphagia (delays or deviances in swallowing) class, and it's shaping up to be to hectic, but wonderful. Nothing like starting out your morning with a little purulent sputum. :P We're about halfway through the spring session at this point, and I'm so ready for a holiday. I've gotten to that point where I can fall asleep anywhere, any time. Being in the car is almost impossible for me. Yesterday we drove from Knox to Eaton's City Centre, and I was asleep!

Robert had the unadulterated pleasure of getting to meet my family yesterday. Highlights include:
- my dad telling us about the time when he and his brother were kids, and sawed off the end of a shotgun. They then couldn't decide who would have to shoot it first, in case it blew up. They ultimately tied it to a tree, and pulled the trigger with a string. Don't we all long to date people with fathers who make SAWED OFF SHOTGUNS and fire them with PIECES OF STRING?
- my mother telling Robert that he should probably run now.
- my sister telling him that she and Brandon had basically decided to get married when they'd been dating as long as we have, and that we should really either get a ring or end it
- my mother welcoming Robert into the family after he demonstrated knowledge of a cunning plan involving a turnip.

All in all, it was actually a pretty good time, and I don't think that anyone was too disturbed by anyone else. This is good, right? :) Oh wait... everyone was disturbed when I mentioned our 'lunaversary....' I mean, we haven't been dating for a year, so it can't be an anniversary! But we have been dating for a month, so it's logical. Logical, I say!

Not too much else is new. I've started my new RA-ship, digitizing video clips into .wav files, and it's kind of fun. All the kids in the videos are from the south, and therefore have the cutest accents ever. I love hearing them say 'pie.'

Well, it's time for me to wrap this up, and go make sure Stu, Stanley and Stella are all wearing their nametags. It's a big day for them...

Love,
Ela

You know Elizabeth's tired when...

2007-06-14T10:28:00.000-06:00

Yesterday I was hanging out with Robert (no, that's not really his name), and I was noticing that Shakespeare (my ex-kitty that I'm cat-sitting while while Al is on vacation) prefers to be with Robert than with me. That's right - my darling cat likes my boyfriend, whom he's only just met, better than he likes me, the woman who fills the food bowl and scoops out the kitty litter.

I stifled a yawn, turned to Robert and said"Hmmm, Shakespeare likes you better than I do.

There was a long silence, nigh unto a pregnant pause, then Robert replied "Maybe I should just go home now."

I sure hope that it wasn't a Freudian slip, or that Shakes REALLY likes Robert!!

Elizabeth

Muddled

2007-06-13T18:08:00.000-06:00

Time makes no sense anymore. I look at my blog, it's been 10 days since I've posted, it feels like forever, and yet this semester isn't even half over. I'm confused! I'm also somewhat ready for a holiday, and a period of time full of sleeping in. :)

The whole clinic experience is very experiential. It is, in two words, gloriously tolerable. The glorious bits are those moments when your adult client spontaneously says 'hi' to another student clinician in the hallway - something he couldn't do when you first met him. It's glorious when your child client's mum tells you that she asks to come to speech every day. It's glorious when some task you're doing just isn't working, and you throw caution to the wind, try something random and new, and it works. There are many, many glorious moments. There are also a lot of tolerable moments: the long days, the course work, the $70 textbook that's the size of a magazine, the tasks that don't work, the sounds that I don't how to elicit... all tolerable.

I'm learning a ridiculous amount this summer. And it's not just about therapy for aphasia and phonological disorders. I'm learning how to work in a team (something I typically avoid like the plague), how to transfer theoretical goals into practical therapy, and how to counsel. The counselling portion of the course has been amazing. I'm boggled at the simple and practical techniques we can all use in all areas of our lives to improve our relationships. Have a friend that's constantly down in the dumps over everything? Everything is negative in a pervasive, permanent, personal way? "I'm never going to make any friends?" a comment you hear from them? Try reframing: "It's really tough for you to make friends at your new university right now, isn't it?" Without denying what they're saying, you're setting them up to be able to move forward, to feel empowered to make a change.

Anyhoo, it's time to go and brush my teeth and head to the dentist's. I finally caved and found one here in the city... I guess I'm really an Edmontonian now!!

Loves you,
Ela.

Shakespearean Hokey Pokey

2007-06-03T19:11:00.001-06:00

O proud left foot, that ventures quick within
Then soon upon a backward journey lithe.
Anon, once more the gesture, then begin:
Command sinistral pedestal to writhe.
Commence thou then the fervid Hokey-Poke.
A mad gyration, hips in wanton swirl.
To spin! A wilde release from heaven's yoke.
Blessed dervish! Surely canst go, girl.
The Hoke, the poke -- banish now thy doubt.
Verily, I say, 'tis what it's all about

I thought you all might like that. :) It's been another busy week, and one where I managed to get the essential stuff done, but failed to do anything beyond that. It's kind of a problem.... I suspect there might be a couple late nights trying to get caught back up!

But I had a woooooooonderful weekend, even though it's hotter than heck here in the city, and I don't handle the heat so well. :) Friday I found out that I've got the go-ahead from the department to start pursuing an international practicum placement, which is very exciting. Even if it doesn't happen, I still get to do a little planning and a little dreaming - both things that I love. Then Friday night a friend and I went for slurpees (or slurshees, as Jake and I call them) and for a walk in the river valley. It was so beautiful out. I adore living downtown, and being close enough to the valley to walk in it whenever I want.

A friend and I went out to Pigeon Lake on Saturday afternoon, and I had the almost pure, only slightly adulterated pleasure of laying in the sand and reading a good book. Sadly, the skeeters were out in full force, and I do be covered in bites! :P But it was wonderful nevertheless to bask in the sun and read. We ate dinner at a cute little cafe out there, and they had the best Greek salad ever. It was fabulous!

Today I met up with Chris and some friends of Chris to go to the Sunday afternoon symphony of Gershwin and Bartok. I was so tired that I was headbobbing, but the music was wonderful. Bits of the Bartok had me wanting to jump up and start dancing in the aisles, tired or not!!

And now it's Sunday evening, the most melancholy time of the week, and I've just had a cool bath, and am going to sit on the balcony with my book and some freezies and bask a little more.
Later days,
Ela

Because I have nothing to write...

2007-06-01T20:35:00.000-06:00

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Grin

2007-05-28T20:43:00.001-06:00

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Holy cow, where'd the week go?

2007-05-27T08:02:00.000-06:00

Hi friends,

I have no idea where this week went. One minute it was the holiday Monday, and I was lazing around playing crib with a friend (whom I skunked!), and the next, it was 6.10 Friday night and our CE meeting was wrapping up.

Clinic is crazy busy, but slowing settling down. You start with doing a session of pre-assessment, then one, two or three session of assessment, and then approximately 10 weeks (20 sessions) of therapy. We're just wrapping up our assessments, and sort of finding our groove. I had the pure pleasure of reading Jillian Jiggs to an adorable four year old. Every time I'd ask her what they were doing in the pictures, she'd say "they making a mess." Not they're flying, they're dressing up, they're being monsters, they're being chickens... just "they making a mess!" *dies from the cuteness*

Friday night I went to Marble Slab with a friend, and then we were at a total loss for what to do next. We decided to check out On the Rocks, a bar that typically has live, local rock bands. This is not something that's usually overly appealing to me, as rock is the one kind of music that I don't usually listen to. However, they had this great cover band playing (Morning Wood), and we stayed for all 3 sets. I didn't get home til after 3am!

Yesterday I slept in, and then was lazy, which was great. I met up with a friend at around 3, and we drove out to the Blackfoot recreation area (by Cooking Lake) and hiked around with his dog for the afternoon. He'd brought a picnic for us, but the mosquitoes were so bad that we had to eat inside!! Luckily, he'd also brought bug spray... but it only held the majority at bay. The few, the proud, the strong... kept biting my legs... (Tangent! When I worked at Hanson's Paint back in high school, one of the contractors - Roger - came up to me one day and said: "I wish I were a mosquito, Elizabeth." "Why?" I asked. "So I could bite your legs." It was a little weird, given that he was in his 50's, and I was 15...)

Today is church, wherein I am teaching the junior church lesson on sharing. Then I'm coming home to try and get a few things done around the flat before it's back to school tomorrow morning. A friend's coming over for supper, and we're going to do some BBQing (provided it doesn't rain), and maybe play some board games. It should be fun!

Cheers,
Elizabeth

Woah-oh, we're halfway there...

2007-05-19T22:26:00.001-06:00

So, I made the deal with myself that if I ran 3 times/week and strength trained 2 times/week for six weeks, I could pierce my naval. Today is the half-way point, and I'd like to show you something:

It's a bit hard to see, I know. But all those little purple circles? They are enclosing the letter S, R and/or B. S = strength training, R = running, B = biking. And those purple circles say that I am right on track! Whee!

I haven't seen any change in my weight in these last 3 weeks, but I am seeing changes in muscle definition in my arms and legs, which is very cool. I motivate myself to strength train by looking at my cute little muscles that I haven't had since the height of my ice cream scooping career last summer. :) And get this: I'm ready to upgrade from the 3lb. weights that I do my 4o minute workouts with to 5lb. ones. Go me!

I've been biking to and from school and church as much as possible, although the rain held me up one day, and my hair did another. My helmet doesn't fit when my hair's in two buns, and I was too tired to problem solve that morning. :D

I've been seeing quite a bit of my friends lately, and in doing so, have come across a couple funny stories for you. We went out for dinner at Padmanadi's (I hope I spelled that right), and it's over kind of in Cromdale. As I was walking from the bus stop to the restaurant, I passed the "Mildly Chinese Herbal Centre." Next time I apply for my passport, I think I'll put down that I'm mildly caucasian.

On Thursday I went to MEC to get a bell for my bike, and I noticed a little placard in an apartment building's flower bed. It said "Thank you for not peeing your pet on our grass." Owch! I feel terrible for these people who are peeing their pets - how excruciatingly painful to have to pass a small mammal through one's urinary tract! And I know that this is what they meant, because three steps down the road there was a SECOND placard, with exactly the same admonition on it. Does PETA know that this is happening??

Bed time - fresh sheets and a good book await!

E.

Going Crazy

2007-05-15T22:18:00.000-06:00

This is my 2nd post today - so if you missed the first one, scroll down!! :D

There's this really fun SheDaisy song called "Don't Worry 'Bout a Thing." It's kind of how I think my peers and I should be thinking about clinic. And then I got carried away... and re-wrote big chunks of it. *blush*

Ever been misunderstood, misused, or misled?
Ever knocked on the sky and had it fall on your head?
Well, don't worry 'bout it
Don't worry

Ever lost your assessment, your treatment, your plan?
Or tried to teach with Dora when they wanted Peter Pan?
Ever been accused of jargon in the treatment room?
Or used the BDAE, such complete and utter doom?
Oh no!

[Chorus]
Clinic’s funny, it’s a mess
Sometimes a curse, always a blessing
Don't worry 'bout a thing
Don't worry 'bout it

It gets sticky, it can bruise
Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose it!
No matter what it brings
Don't worry 'bout a thing!

Ever met a client, and then forgot their name?
Or found out that your kid completely hates that game?
Don't worry 'bout it,
No, don't worry

Ever lost your agenda, ever lost your clipboard, too?
Or found your adult client wand’ring through the Corbett zoo?
Or been stuck in a tangent like crazy glue
Or scraped your kiddo’s gum off the bottom of your shoe?
Boo hoo!

[Repeat Chorus]

[Bridge:]
We all got a little junk in the trunk
And when you're feelin' good as sunk
Remember, practicum will be just fine
If I laugh at yours then you'll laugh at mine!

[Repeat Chorus]

If you'd like to hear the song that this is based off of, let me know, and I can hook you up!

G'night!

Ela

Other people say it better...

2007-05-15T20:25:00.000-06:00

I've only been in clinic for a week and 2 days now, but I've already learned a lot. I'm so tired by the time I get home, though, that I don't feel particularly lucid or articulate. The following are a few quotes that caught my eye...

We confess our little faults to persuade people that we have no large ones. (Francois de la Rochefoucauld, 1613-1680.)
- Clearly, this man has worked in groups, and groups in the 17th century weren't so different from the ones we have today!! We all (myself included!!) do this: own up to something little ("man, I really stacked a couple of those questions" ) to try and avoid something worse ("man, that interview went badly!").

I am not in this world to live up to other people's expectations, nor do I feel that the world must live up to mine. (Fritz Perls.)
- This is an attitude that I'm still working on! But come on - talk about the ideal way to function in a group!! :D

You probably wouldn't worry about people think of you if you could know how seldom they do. (Olin Miller.)
- Again - the perfect attitude towards group work. :P

The only normal people are the ones you don't know very well. (Joe Ancis.)
- It's true. :) But it's also true that people become much cooler and more interesting as you get to know them.

I wish people who have trouble communicating would just shut up. (Tom Lehrer.)
- No! No, I don't!! I just sniggered when I read this - this speechie's black sense of humour is rearing its head. :)

So. Clinic. It's busy, it's tiring, and it's really, really, REALLY hard for an independent kind of student like me to adapt to having to do everything with a partner or in a group. BUT. The people are amazing. I couldn't have chosen a better group if I'd had the option. Our clients are incredible. The opportunities for this summer are endless. I just might need to be a hermit on the weekends to try and recharge. (Introversion! Ack! And here I thought that I was becoming an extrovert!)

Final quote for the day: She had a pretty gift for quotation, which is a serviceable substitute for wit. (W. Somerset Maugham.)

Ciao bellas,
Ela

Swiper, no swiping!

2007-05-14T19:32:00.000-06:00

Recognize the quote in the title? Yeah, me neither. Apparently, it's from Dora the Explorer, an extremely popular TV show for little kids (kind of in the 3-5 range, I think). I also think that it's mostly a girl thing - and therefore something that I missed out on with Jake. The problem? Our little girl in clinic loves Dora. Like, wearing the t-shirt, carrying the back-pack kind of love. And I don't know it! Caillou, Sponge Bob, The Weekenders? Blues Clues? I know the quotes! I know te characters! I can SING THE BLEEDING THEME SONGS! But Dora? Dora, I know not. I may have to rent it this week to get myself caught up... ;)

Also, me and change? Not a good couple. It's like change is a 5'4" guy with halitosis and a momma's boy complex. And he's needy. And has bacne. And, and... did I mention he's short? And skinny! Yeah, real skinny. Anyhoo. Last semester, I was typically done school at about 3. Today, our meeting didn't wrap up til about 6.15. Have y'all heard the term 'hangry' before? It's when you get 'angry' when you're 'hungry.' I had a serious case of the hangry today. Also, a serious case of the "my brain shut off at 3, I kept it going til 4 because I had a client, but now I'm done." I couldn't quite yawning in my meeting with my clinical educator. I felt awful... and am contemplating sending her an email apologizing! Riding my bike home was nice, because it's so sunny, but it was also tough. The wind blows straight down the bike path... and there's a big chunk of it that's uphill. I almost couldn't pass a guy out running... *blush*

I mentioned meeting our pediatric client today - and she's a dolly. So adorable, and you can totally tell she's spunky. I bet my sister was a lot like this little girl when she was small. Willing to cooperate as long as what you're doing is interesting, but lose her attention, and you're in trouble. :) Luckily, Katie is the pro-star with the kiddos, so we're going to have wicked cool sessions. I'm looking forward to it!

So now I'm home, and I should really be doing some strength training, but I can hardly keep my eyes open. I'm thinking that going to bed with a book, or laying on the couch watching poker sounds good. I'll be... strength training... my... eyes. Yeah. THAT'S it. :P

Ok. The horizontal position is calling my name. (Damn right I'm good in bed... I can sleep for days!)

Laters!
e.

Balance

2007-05-13T16:46:00.000-06:00

Yeah, yeah, I cut the top of my head off. YOU try and take a picture of yourself standing on one foot. (Please ignore the empty wine bottle and the garbage that needs to go out... I'll be dealing with those later! And yes, my shirt *does* say "does not play well with others." I think that forewarned is forarmed!)

Anyhoo. This is actually not the kind of balance I'm talking about. I just thought it'd be cute. I'm talking about the kind of balance where your life doesn't consist of going to school, cleaning your apartment, watching TV, and reading books. *coughcoughthelifeIlivedayearorsoagocoughcough*. I was running through the river valley on Friday morning when I suddenly realized how much happier I am now than I've ever been before. (This seems to be a theme for this year. It's a good theme. It could stick around for as long as it wanted, and I'd be pleased. Thematically pleasing, that's my life.) And I think a lot of it is just that I'm so much more balanced than I've ever been before.

At heart, I'm an introvert. Being with people uses up my energy; being alone replenishes it. Lovely. Fine. Not a big deal. But I used to spend absolutely obscene amounts of time alone. Sitting next to someone for 50 minutes in a 300 person psych class really doesn't count as time with others. ;) The weirdest part is that, in many ways, I was convinced that I liked spending so much time with me, myself, and I. I have very 'happy' memories of puttering around the apartment for a whole weekend, never really seeing anyone else, except my roommate.

WHAT WAS I THINKING?? I would go INSANE if I spent that much time doing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING now. When I think of all the time I wasted in front of the TV... yuck! And I was lonely all the time, because I never spent any time with any people! (Was that sentence good English? I think not. But you get the idea.)

Anyhoo. I was running in the river valley, and I realized that now, even when I'm by myself, I'm a lot happier than I used to be. Now, when I'm alone, I'm usually doing something productive, like running, or reading, or cooking, instead of sitting on the couch, letting my brain cells ooze out my ears. (I also sleep. Sleep is good.) And I value that alone time so much more because I spend a lot of time with great, great people. Megs and I are together a lot, I'm going for dinner with Chris tonight, Katie and I will be attached at the hip this summer... and yes, I'm still dating like a 'floozy' (as Adrian so nicely put it! *grin*)

So I'm taking care of myself socially, spiritually, physically (I love riding my bike. My brother tells me that I'm the kind of girl who takes something totally geeky, and rocks it. Hence my Cool Cat sunglasses, and my sexy bike. That's its name, by the way. One of my classmates christened it!), and intellectually. It's such a great feeling!

Also a great feeling: I'm officially able to make conversation with a rock now. I know, I know - you're all thinking "E., you never STOP talking. Why is this exciting??" The truth of the matter is that, yes, I can talk the hind leg off a rhino... provided that I already know the rhino, and am comfortable with him. But I really, really stink at making small talk with people that I don't know that well. This was probably my biggest weakness as an ESL teacher - I found it really difficult to stimulate natural conversation in the classroom without using some sort of paper prompt (a game, a story, etc.). I was a bit worried about this being a problem in my clinical life, as well. Then, well...

Then I started dating a lot more than usual. And seriously - one or two dates where no one says anything, because neither of you can think of anything to say? HIGHLY MOTIVATING. My use of open-ended questions, and "tell me more" has increased exponentially. ;) I feel a lot more comfortable in odd little situations, like talking to people at church whom I don't know well, chatting with the staff at school that I don't interact with very often, etc..., and I'm really hoping that it carries over into clinic. We'll see!

Well, this is a long and introspective post. (AKA - really boring for anyone that isn't me.)

Cheers!
me

Ugh, change

2007-05-11T18:19:00.000-06:00

Hey dudes,

I imagine that at least one or two of you is wondering how my week has been so far. Two words: totally overwhelming. However, I've learned how to deal with that emotion. You just let it be! I'm giving myself til tomorrow afternoon or Saturday morning to just be overwhelmed, and not do anything about it. Then, Saturday morning at the latest, I'm going to start with the to-do list, and get myself organized and on-top of things.

That's a quote from September, describing my feelings about the first week of my Master's. It's also pretty apt regarding the first week of clinic/practicum. A completely different schedule (far from having no class on Friday, I'm in class at 9, and have a last meeting at 5.30), information overload ("you need to meet with your partner all the time, your consulting partners twice a week for an hour, and with your clinicial educator twice a week. "), and a few nerves about the fact that we're going to be dealing with REAL PEOPLE (no more video case studies!!). It's all a bit... well, overwhelming. But I've just been going with the flow for now, and I spent Wednesday evening organizing everything, so I'm feeling better about where I need to be and when.

My direct partner, Katie, and I are getting along great. It turns out that we have really similar styles of organizing ourselves, and similar levels of confidence in our abilities as therapists. I'm really enjoying working with her. Our consulting pair, J & N, are very different from us, which is great, because they'll be able to give us feedback on things we may not even think about.

This week we got our clients' files to read, in order to prepare to meet them, and to get ready for assessing their communication abilities. I was going to tell you a little bit about them just in general (nothing that would ever enable you to identify them), but I've decided not to. It just seems a little risky to put that kind of info out there on the web. Suffice it to say that both of our clients appear to be friendly, bright, and highly motivated. We're really excited to meet them! One little tidbit: it's really difficult to develop an interview that includes an adult who only has two words in his/her spontaneous speech. I'm just saying. (Katie and I have come up with some fantastic ideas!)

I'm continuing to learn how much my past experiences are going to support me as a therapist. It's pretty cool to have those moments that are "Oh! This is just like when I did __________ at _________________ (previous job)." I'm so excited to start being a clinician - to learn my strengths and weaknesses, and to be a part of my clients' lives.

Speaking of clients' lives, we had CPR today (ba dum dum). We have to have the healthcare providers' CPR, which is a bit more intense than the typical one is. I can do perform CPR on infants, children and adults, and I learned how to use an AED (automated external defibrillator). That's one of those zappy packs that you see on the hospital shows, y'know: "Clear!" *ZAP* :D They've made a small, idiot-proof version, and I learned how to use it. Very fun. If you're going to have a heart attack, make sure you have me around! (I jest! I jest!! I'd really like to go through life having to NEVER use my mad CPR skilz).

So that's where this week is at. A lovely friend of mine gave me a MEC gift certificate, so I'm going to head over there tomorrow to get a bell, a new lock, and a basket. It's going to be great!

Laters,
e.

Back to School

2007-05-08T18:39:00.000-06:00

Hey all,

so I've been back at school for two days of spring session. Today, I had to have a nap when I got home. *blush*

I was feeling a bit worried and stressed about this whole 'clinic' experience, and had really put off thinking about it for quite a while. Yesterday was an "orientation and jumping in with both feet" kind of day - a day that a few of my peers found disconcerting and a bit stressful. For me, it actually calmed some of my concerns. We finally sorted out some of our schedules, and got a sense of what the spring would look like. Today we continued in that vein, and learned about what our clinical educators (the SLPs who supervise in the clinic) expect of us. As we talked about it, I realized that I'm in a wonderful position: I have done a LOT of this before!

Being observed and critically evaluated while practicing a professional skill? I spent four full weeks doing that in September '06, during my teacher training. I can handle that. Communicating with someone where communication is difficult? Eight months in Prague working with non-native speakers of English. Legal documentation for confidentiality, monitoring contact, tracking treatment? Six months working for the Edmonton John Howard Society. I am feeling much, much better about my ability to do this. I'm also smiling to myself, and thanking God for the circuitious route I took to get to speech!

One of our textbooks this term is Counseling Persons with Communication Disorders and Their Families. This book is wonderful, and is inspiring a new interest in me. A few of you know that, during my fourth year of uni, I had some serious doubts about becoming an SLP. I was also considering law or clinical psych. Eventually I decided that speech was really the place for me. This textbook, along with our assessment class, is showing me that speech is a field that is slowly beginning to incorporate more and more counseling strategies. This is so exciting! It appears that I'm going to have the opportunity to pursue my interest counseling alongside my interest in speech and language. Sweet! (Hmm... PhD in clinical psychology...)

So school and my excitement are both a little tiring. I think I'm also tired because yesterday I got up and ran for 45 minutes before school, and this morning I got up and did an hour of strength training. THEN... I rode my 'new' bike to and from school!

Ok, so 'new' is stretching it. It's actually older than I am. But it's comfy, the tires hold air, and it gets me from point A ("downtown") to point B ("school"). Let me tell you - pedalling home in the wind is very tiring! But it's fun to be out with all the other cyclists, and I get to school a bit faster than I do when I take the LRT. So huzzah!

Well, that's all that's new... bye for now!
e.

PS - What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor?

No Excuses

2007-05-03T09:40:00.000-06:00

So I practically abandoned my blog there for a while, and I really have no excuse. Was I in the middle of finals? Yes, but that didn't stop me from doing 800 other things that didn't need doing. Was I very tired? Yup, but I still managed to catch up on most of this past season of CSI:NY as well as a whole bunch of movies (Stick It, anyone? So great!). So, no excuses. In fact, I even logged into my blogger account a couple times, stared at the blank page, and gave up. Not this time! This time is:

An Update.

School. I wrapped up my first academic year of my Master's as of April 26. Yay! This wasn't my best semester ever - I did a lot of procrastinating, and I feel like I could've done better on some of the assignments. I was carrying an extra class, though, and a thesis, so I had a bit more on my plate this term than last term. But - no excuses! Clearly, I need to continue working on my organizational and motivational skills. :)

Work. I finished my RA-ship at COMPRU the 2nd last Friday in April. There's no budget for me to have a summer RA-ship, but I am hoping that my schedule this spring allows me to continue at COMPRU, just in a volunteer position. We'll have to see. Our department chair has a PhD student from the U.S. who is looking for someone to help digitize some files for her dissertation. The pay is quite good, though they don't know how many hours it will be for. Obviously, I applied, and I have an interview on Monday or Tuesday. I'm really hoping that I can get the position, as it would be nice to have a bit of extra income over the summer.

Friends. There's been quite a bit of socializing going on, including a tea party at Chris' place last weekend. The food was fantastic, per the usual, and Robin and Chris (my two male friends!) got to meet each other. Megan and Robin also met for the first time, which was pretty cool. Look at me and my interacting friends! I've also been getting to know another of the thesis girls pretty well - I'll call her Harley. She and I have been kicking around the idea of going for dinner one night this week, and I hope that we can make that work.

Running. As if you're all not wondering if I'm keeping it up. I'll admit, I slacked a bit during finals, only running once or twice a week, instead of three or four times. But I'm getting back on track. My weight management counsellor and I decided that my goals are to run 3x a week, and strength train 2x a week. Hopefully I can keep up with that! I had set a reward for myself - if I lost a certain amount of weight, I'd pierce my naval. However, I think I've plateaued, and I'm not sure I'm ever actually going to get down to my 'goal' weight. So I've changed that goal. Now it says that if I can run 3x/wk and strength train 2x/wk for 6 full weeks, I can pierce my naval. We'll see where I'm at on the 2nd Saturday in June. :)

Well, I'm off to have a bath. It was too cold and rainy this morning to run, so I stayed in and did a cardio workout (Turbo Jam - it's geeky, but I like it) instead. It totally counts!! Anyhoo, now I'm a little tired, and I smell a little funky, so I think a bath is a good plan. :D

Laters!
Elizabeth

I LOVE these books...

2007-04-29T18:03:00.000-06:00

I'm so excited for the movie!

Exam Stress

2007-04-25T15:15:00.000-06:00

Hey all,

so I'm *thisclose* to being done exams - just one more left to go! But today's exam was pretty stressful, including 3 long answers that all looked pretty much the same to me, but were worth 13, 17, and 30 points respectively. I'm not quite sure what made the one worth twice as much as the other...

So, how stressed am I?? This stressed:

And I figured - hey, my toes are cute, my fingers should be too!:

So now. I must get back to the clinical aphasiology. Though I must admit, it's hard to study when your fingers keep distracting you... ;)

Love,
ela

Thesis = Paper

2007-04-17T16:35:00.000-06:00

Hi again!

I've been at it for about 9 hours now, and I thought I deserved another little break. This time, I thought I'd show you a bit of what I'm doing.

This is what my bed currently looks like:
I don't have enough desk space to spread out all of these papers to read them, so my bed is sufficing. Notice that many of them are made up of several sheets lovingly folded and scotch-taped together. I always knew those origami lessons would pay off someday.

This is a close up of the bottom 3 pages:
Those are important. All of those are supposed to fall into neat and tidy groups, preferably the 6 neat and tidy groups that I predicted they'd fall into. Guess what? That's right. They're not. I'm a little hung up over what to do with them. I sense I'm spending tonight in SPSS doing an additional rotation to see if I can convince them to be sweet and behave themselves.

And those 341 sheets of paper? Well, they're kind of filed now:
I have 4 research questions in my presentation, and each folder holds the printouts of the analyses that should answer those questions. Note how the first folder is HUGE. I printed out all of this factor analysis stuff, then realized I didn't need all of it. *headdesk* However, to quote my dad: "It's better to have it and not need it than to need it and not have it." Amen to that, brother! Ahem, Amen to that, Dad!

Ok, I'm off to try to and graph the medians of my randomly selected variables in order to demonstrate what the Kruskal-Wallis scores mean... If you don't get that, don't worry. Neither do I, and I'm presenting it to 3 of my instructors, one of their wives, and 4 of my peers in just over 24 hours. Sweet!!

Love,
Elizabeth

ETA: I tried an additonal rotation - SPSS can't do anything more with my data. What I've got is as good as it gets. *sigh*

E.

Some days I think I should have just gotten a job...

2007-04-17T08:16:00.000-06:00

Morning all! It's 8.15, and I have 15 minutes before the SPA office opens and I can go and borrow a stapler. I've been at school for about an hour now, printing out data for my presentation on Wednesday, and now I need to organize my THREE HUNDRED AND FORTY ONE pages of stuff. So much for my printing credit... ;) And just think - 48 hours to analyze and make sense of it all!

Yesterday was one of those days by the end of which I was wishing I had pursued a career with my BA. You know, I could have made a great barista, meat wrapper or babysitter. I got a ridiculous Telus bill, bought the wrong kind of mouse, and spent about 14 hours straight in front of computer. On the plus side, I had maki, got a mouse that worked, and didn't actually have a mental breakdown and proceed to orating:

I think mice
are rather nice.

Their tails are long,
Their faces small,
They haven't any
Chins at all.
Their ears are pink,
Their teeth are white.
They run around
The house at night.
They nibble things
They shouldn't touch
And no one seems
To like them much.

But I think mice
are nice.

That's by Rose Fyleman, by the by.

So yesterday was not so good. But today is a new day, I'm wearing a cute skirt, I have a coffee... and the speech office is now open. I'm going to find a stapler.

Love,
e.

Cool Cat

2007-04-14T10:38:00.000-06:00

Morning all!

I got up early-ish this morning, and went to run an errand. I needed to get a pair of glasses fixed. They were almost fixed, thanks to my Grandpa's ingenuity, but not quite. So I ran them over to the optician's, and asked if they could do anything for me. The lady took my glasses, looked at them rather oddly, and said "you want these fixed?"

"Yup," I said. "I know they're old, but they've got a lot of sentimental value. And I'm planning on wearing them this summer."

These aren't just any glasses. They're sunglasses. They're the cool cat sunglasses.

When I was a toddler, I loved to ride on the buddy seat* in my grandpa's car. I also used to wear his sunglasses, and he told me that I looked like a real 'cool cat.' A few years later, at the ripe old age of about 6, I was digging through the glove compartment:

"Grandpa! I remember these! I used to wear these cool cat glasses back in the old days!"

Well, Grandpa gave me the cool cat glasses at Easter this year, and I thought they looked pretty cute on me. I got them back to 100% now, so you can tell me:

Love,
Elizabeth

*buddy seat - the arm rest that folds down in the middle of front seat. I don't know if newer cars have them or not...

Do you think she'd look at you if you were poor?

2007-04-06T21:06:00.000-06:00

Do you think I'd look at her if she were ugly? Fair's fair.

*grin* That's a line from the movie we watched tonight called A Good Woman starring Scarlett Johannsen (spelling?) and Helen Hunt. It was an interesting look at what life in the upper-middle class British world was like in the '30s, something I don't spend a lot of time thinking about. ;) The best bit was the costumes - they were absolutlely divine. It didn't hurt that the film was set in a beautiful Italian villa, either. The background helped make up for the lack of plot.

I spent today working on school stuff (finished another 3 sections on my thesis survey, go me!) and starting to study for finals. I'm amazed at how basic some of the earlier stats stuff seems now. At the time of the assignments, I was totally overwhelmed. Now, looking back, it's like "what on earth was so confusing about a Mann-Whitney U? Geez!" I'm kind of dreading tomorrow's session though - where I hit the stuff I'm pretty sure will still confuse me. Analyzing the SPSS output for a factor analysis? Gross. MANOVA? I'm not even sure I know what it stands for! Luckily, my newest book, SPSS for Psychologists, arrived in the mail yesterday, so I at least have a resource to go to!

I've got 2 projects and 6 finals coming up, and I was seriously contemplating being panicked this week. But I sat down and looked at my calendar yesterday - and they're actually spaced out rather nicely. Provided I can stay relatively on top of things... *grin* Yeah, right - because that always works out for me!

All right duckies - I'm off to study the lecture on Correlations. Go r-values! Make predictions! And then maybe I'll have a chaser of myasthenia gravis. Nothing like a little damage at the neuromuscular junction to give you some lower motor neuron issues. Yay flaccid dysarthria, fatigue and breathiness!

G'night,
Ela

Commitment-Phobes

2007-03-31T11:15:00.000-06:00

A common criticism of my generation (Gen Y, Net Gen, whatever you want to call us kids who grew up wit hcomputers in school) is that we are unable to commit to anything. Long term relationship? No thanks. Lifetime career? Not for me. Kids? Woah. Waaaaaaaaaaaaay too much invested there. And you know what? I'm mostly Ok with that. I don't see holding off on these major decisions as a bad thing (though perhaps being incapable of any of them for your entire life is a problem. But that's a rant for another day, so I'll leave my pet steed, Tangent, in the stable today). What I'm NOT Ok with is our total inability to commit to small scale stuff.

A classmate of mine's boyfriend is going away on a fieldschool, and as a fundraiser, they sold tickets to a bar night last night. The classmate asked all of us girls if anyone would be interested in attending. Megs and I both said yes pretty much right off the bat. I even bought my ticket from her the next day. A number of other girls said they'd LOVE to come, but didn't want to buy tickets right away, they'd buy them at the door. Well, guess what. Megs and I were the only two from our class who showed up (besides the girl organizing it, of course). It really irritates me that people who are my age seem to find it impossible to say 'Yeah, I'll be there,' and then actually show up.

I used to be the same way. I'd bail on tons of plans, just because the wind changed and I longer *really* felt like going. Then I tried to host a few parties or nights out on the town, and no one showed up. It kind of clicked for me then. So now, I try my best to be a keeper of my word. Sometimes things changed. Someone gets sick, you have to spend the afternoon in the library doing research, your family shows up unexpectedly. I get it. But generally speaking, how hard is it to say "I'm coming," and then actually show up?

Part of the problem is, I think, our society's current inability to say 'no' to anything. We all feel like we have to do everything and we feel guilty if we don't say that we'll at least attempt to meet the needs of whomever it is we're currently talking to. But when we find ourselves overburdened, under-equipped, or just even tired... well, now what? We can't be heard to say 'no...' so we bail. We just don't show up. Occasionally we'll send some lame excuse via email or a text message (nothing too threatening in those - you don't have to actually talk to the person), but often it'll just be the next time we see them: "oh hey, sorry about Friday. Something came up."

Megs and I talk a lot about 'keeping people,' meaning caring for them because they are bearers of God's image. I'm starting to believe that keeping people means letting 'your yes be yes' even in the little things. Strike that. Especially in the little things. Building that trust so that they know you'll be there when you say you'll be, doing what you said you'd do. I think a lot of the members of my generation also frequently feel isolated... perchance these two things are connected?

Elizabeth

A new way to know all about me...

2007-03-29T17:50:00.000-06:00

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Blech

2007-03-27T15:56:00.000-06:00

Have you looked out the window today? It's gross out there. To quote Gilmore Girls, "it's cold and grey, like a fat, dead pigeon." Yes. Days like this should be automatic cancelled school days, complete with mandatory directions about staying in bed with cocoa and good books.

I think I've gotten past my thesis 'writer's-block' that I've been struggling with the past few days... and along with that, I seem to have regained some motivation. Fantastic!! I've got 2 or 3 projects that need to be finished, along with the a ton of reading in preparation for finals. I'm bound and determined to feel prepared for all of my exams again (this term's round of midterms went relatively well, if not great, and I'd like to stick with that), so I need to get going on that stuff already!

My social life has been bumping lately, which I love. :) The best bit recently was getting to spend an evening with Al, watching Black Books. It's so brilliant. And there's nothing better than just hanging out with a good friend, laughing. I also went to a Thesis Club dinner party, which was amazing. The food! The people! The laughter! We stayed out til midnight or so, mostly just laughing and talking about school and life. It was great. *grin*

Tomorrow night our Thesis Club is meeting again (this time, we're ordering pizza) and we're creating some fun decorations for our lab. Then Thursday night I'm going out for dinner at the New Asian Village with a friend (who says the food is great). Friday I'm getting my stitches out (I had a small growth removed from my shin), then going to COMPRU for work. After work, my folks are picking me up to go out for dinner. We're going to the La Ronde to celebrate the SSHRC, which is very exciting! I booked the reservation for 7, so we should be there in time for the sunset. I sure hope it quits snowing by then!! :D

Well, I'm off. Hope you're all well!

Ela

toot

2007-03-22T17:49:00.000-06:00

Hi guys!

Remember this post? I remember posting it. Vividly. The panic was setting in, my beloved Dexter (laptop) was ill, my SSHRC was on Megs', and only Megs', computer, the bloody SSHRC was due the next day, and I was making frantic, last minute edits. I handed it in barely on time, jogging down the halls of Corbett, mentally singing the theme from "Chariots of Fire" (I may have been humming out loud, but let's pretend I wasn't), and wishing that it would all just be finished. I wanted nothing more than to shirk the SSHRC.

Good thing I didn't. I was 'unofficially' notified today (it's pretty much for sure, it's just that my supervisors have heard from SSHRC, but I haven't gotten my letter yet - it's coming! At least it better - it'd be awfully embarassing if it didn't show up now...) that The Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council of Canada is awarding me a very healthy scholarship for next year - healthy enough to pretty much cover all of my costs!

So that's my good news. And now I'm done tooting my own horn.

E.

*toot*

ISFJ

2007-03-21T13:31:00.000-06:00

Hey all! I'm having a *wonderful* day. Slept in a bit, worked on a paper, went for a run, had a nap, started a case study, and am now listening to the Decemberists. So fab.

A few weeks ago, Megs and I were talking about our personality styles. In some ways, we're really very similar, but in other ways, we're waaaaaaay different. She made reference to her Myers-Briggs' profile - but I couldn't relate, because I'd never done one. So, off to the trusty internet! I found an online version (goodness knows how accurate it really is...) and I filled it out. According to my results, I'm Introverted, Sensing, Feeling and Judging. Here are some excerpts from my report:

ISFJs are characterized above all by their desire to serve others, their "need to be needed." In extreme cases, this need is so strong that standard give-and-take relationships are deeply unsatisfying to them; however, most ISFJs find more than enough with which to occupy themselves within the framework of a normal life. (Since ISFJs, like all SJs, are very much bound by the prevailing social conventions, their form of "service" is likely to exclude any elements of moral or political controversy; they specialize in the local, the personal, and the practical.)

I think this bit is quite true of me - I do like to take care of my friends, and I like it to be as uncontroversial as possible! I also am interested in things that I can do personally - if you ask me why politics doesn't interest me, I believe it's because it's too 'removed' from me.

In the workplace, ISFJs are methodical and accurate workers, often with very good memories and unexpected analytic abilities; they are also good with people in small-group or one-on-one situations because of their patient and genuinely sympathetic approach to dealing with others. ISFJs make pleasant and reliable co-workers and exemplary employees, but tend to be harried and uncomfortable in supervisory roles. They are capable of forming strong loyalties, but these are personal rather than institutional loyalties; if someone they've bonded with in this way leaves the company, the ISFJ will leave with them, if given the option. Traditional careers for an ISFJ include: teaching, social work, most religious work, nursing, medicine (general practice only), clerical and and secretarial work of any kind, and some kinds of administrative careers.

This is somewhat true - though I think I would make a very competent supervisor. I also believe in institutional loyalties; my dad has taught me about the importance of walking the company line, and I think that it's very important to be on board with what your organization is doing.

While their work ethic is high on the ISFJ priority list, their families are the centers of their lives. ISFJs are extremely warm and demonstrative within the family circle--and often possessive of their loved ones, as well. Being SJs, they place a strong emphasis on conventional behavior; if any of their nearest and dearest depart from the straight-and-narrow, it causes the ISFJ major embarrassment: the closer the relationship and the more public the act, the more intense the embarrassment. Over time, however, ISFJs usually mellow. Needless to say, ISFJs take infinite trouble over meals, gifts, celebrations, etc., for their loved ones--although strong Js may tend to focus more on what the recipient should want rather than what they do want.

Again, this is pretty true. I love my family deeply, and would do anything for them. And anyone who knows me well knows that should someone be foolish enough to propose to me on the jumbotron at Rexall... well. He'll be going home alone.

Like most Is, ISFJs have a few, close friends. They are extremely loyal to these, and are ready to provide emotional and practical support at a moment's notice. The older the friendship is, the more an ISFJ will value it. One ISFJ trait that is easily misunderstood by those who haven't known them long is that they are often unable to either hide or articulate any distress they may be feeling. An adult ISFJ may drive a (later ashamed) friend or SO into a fit of temper over the ISFJ's unexplained moodiness, only afterwards to explain about a death in the family they "didn't want to burden anyone with." Those close to ISFJs should learn to watch for the warning signs in these situations and take the initiative themselves to uncover the problem.

Ok, not so true. I have NO problems articulating what's wrong. :) But I do have a few close friends, close enough to feel like family, really. (All of the above quotes are from http://typelogic.com/isfj.html)

So must of this was pretty accurate, I thought. Oddly enough, when I looked at another description of ISFJs, they were referred to as Protector Guardians.

The primary desire of the Protector Guardian is to be of service to others, but here "service" means not so much furnishing others with the necessities of life, as guarding others against life's pitfalls and perils, that is, seeing to their safety and security. Protectors find great satisfaction in assisting the downtrodden and can deal with disability and neediness in others better than any other type. With their extraordinary commitment to security, and with their unusual talent for executing routines, Protectors do well in many careers that have to do with conservation: curators, private secretaries, librarians, middle-managers, police officers, and especially general medical practitioners. To be sure, the hospital is a natural haven for them; it is home to the family doctor, preserver of life and limb, and to the registered nurse, or licensed practical nurse, truly the angels of mercy. (http://keirsey.com/personality/sjif.html)

Some of the other stuff they had there was less accurate, but I thought that these bits really summed up why I'm in speech. What threw me most was that I (like many of us, I think) tend to think of myself as being pretty unique. Reading through these summaries, I realized that there are a lot of people out there who are much more similar to me than I thought. I know that this is the basis for a lot of charlantry (e.g., tarot readers, etc.), who throw out general facts that tend to be true about a lot of people, but I never really considered its effect on other parts of my life. I think a lot of my teenage angst centred around feeling like I WAS THE ONLY PERSON IN THE WHOLE WORLD WHO FELT THIS WAY *woe is me*... but now I know that odds are pretty good that there are a goodly number of people feeling the same way I do! Solidarity with the world!

E.

That was odd...

2007-03-12T14:11:00.001-06:00

My life is frequently full of odd moments. For example, I was talking to a friend this past week, and telling hime all about my language and literacy class. The following is an excerpt from our conversation:

It's [the class] really, really, really, REALLY boring. Though I did have the opportunity to say "The pigs are stacked! Who stacks pigs?" and "They sacrificed the pig to the pig god!"

Yes. I kid you not - we were looking at a picture for a story elicitation task, and the prof asked what we thought was happening. My first though was "they sacrificed the pig to the pig god!" I ask you this: would YOU want YOUR kids doing a story elicitation task where animals sacrificing one of their own was an option?

Life has been, as is now apparently the norm, incredibly busy. According to my timeline, my thesis proposal is to be done in two weeks. Ahem. Well - I've got 3 paragraphs written... that counts, right? I need to bus down to the Wonk and hide out there for a while and try and get some work done. Edmonton is just too full of fun and fabulous people!

Thurday night I went for Thai food for the first time, and it was awesome. I can't wait to try more of it!! Friday was the Rush game, and we won! wOOt! That's our 4th win of the season. Such a great game - and there was a wicked fistfight. I love a good scrap! Yesterday afternoon my small group and I went to help the Food Bank fill their truck for their current drive. Things were a little slow at first, so we went into Zeller's and bought sidewalk chalk, a frisbee, and a pool noodle. We drew on the asphalt, we threw the frisbee around, and... we played the animal game!! It was SO fun! Nothing like wailing on your friends with a lime green noodle. :) If you watch Shaw on Monday at 4, you might see us - one of the volunteers was a Shaw cameraman, and he shot some footage. None of the noodling, though. ;) Then last night was coffee with a friend, which was very fun. The 2nd Cup by MEC has the most beautiful painting of irises done in oranges and yellows that would look great in my place. Anyone have $600 they'd like to loan me to buy a painting? ;)

Today was church, which was great - we wrapped up Esther. Lyle told us to 'always remember, and never forget' to celebrate God's goodness. There's so much sadness in our world (and today we heard about a lot of people's sorrow - my heart hurt for them), and it is right to mourn for that - but it is also right celebrate the blessings. I think I might need to host a "celebrate the blessings" party sometime!!

So that's life at the moment - tomorrow night Megs and I are baking sweet rolls, so I can take them into my stats class on Tuesday morning. It should be fun!!

Later days!
E.

How do you make a kleenex dance?

2007-03-12T11:26:00.000-06:00

'lo. It's grey and gloomy outside. I feel grey and gloomy on the inside. Losing one's stats assignment and having to do it a 2nd time coupled with cold rainy weather and not enough sleep makes me feel LUGUBRIOUS. I am feeling LUGUBRIOUS today. So.

Ela's Tried and True Methods of Cheering Oneself Up

1. Listen to cheery music with a good beat. I recommend Josie & the Pussycats or Garth Brooks. If those fail, go with Get Set Go's "I Hate Everyone." (Careful... it's rude.) It sounds so perky! It's so vindictive!

2. Go for a run. Get up 45 minutes earlier than usual, and head out. Listen to some good tunes (see #1). Enjoy the dark. Enjoy the icy puddles. Ice for slipping, puddles for dripping! Run into the river valley, then realize how dark and stupid it is to do that, and run back out. Then enjoy the feeling of relief!

3. Sleep. Now this one is important. You see, if you get up 45 minutes earlier, you should go to bed about two hours earlier. Missing this vital step will lead to you sitting in research methods, staring out the window, and commenting that the weather looks like Mother Earth is throwing up. Nothing like nature with gastroenteritis.

4. Bad jokes. Nothing fixes you like a good knee-slapper. By the way... you put a little boogie in it!

Prior to losing my stats assignment, I had a really good weekend. The circus was really fun, and our high-wire guy also fell, so our circus was just as good as Jake's was. ;) Sunday Megs and I sang in church, and it went really well, which was fun. Mum and Dad were there, so they took us out for lunch (yum!), and then I spent part of the afternoon at the dog park with a friend which was very fun.

Class today is boring and tedious, but that's just life. Tonight my language and literacy class is coming over for a potluck in order to work on an assignment, so that should be fun. Then tomorrow I want to get up early and run again. We'll see how well that goes. ;)

Ok, lunch time. Yay for leftover maki!

love,
ela

Put your right foot forward, put your left foot forward, put your right foot forward again...

2007-03-10T10:52:00.000-07:00

I LOVE the song that today's title is from. It's by Wet Secrets, an Edmonton band, and it's on my Sweatin' to the Indies playlist. If you feel like it, check out CBC Radio 3's website, and you can hear it - it's called Secret March.

I got up this morning, and the sun was pouring into my room, and my sheets were especially soft. Always a good start to the day! I got up, threw some laundry in, changed my sheets (I missed Fresh Sheet Friday - it'll have to be Fresh Sheet Saturday, which isn't as alliteratively pleasing), and then went for a GLORIOUS run. It was sunny but cool, my music was good, and there were lots of other pleasant runners out and about exchanging smiles and 'good mornings'. I'm pretty sure that this morning was my longest run yet, just because I didn't want to go back inside. The only problem is that with a bit of sun, a bit of wind, and a lot of exertion, I get runburn. It's like sunburn, only less peely. I got home about an hour ago, showered, cleaned up my room, etc., and my cheeks are still brilliantly red. Hot, I know.

Today I'm going to the circus with Johnnie. Jacob was disappointed that I didn't go with him and dad, so when I talked to him today he said "your circus won't be as good as ours. The high wire guy fell when we went!" Owch! I always feel nervous when the artists work without nets... and apparently, I have legitimate reasons for feeling that way!!

Ok, I need to go and do some homework, if I can get focused (unlikely!) Catch y'all later.

E.

Isak Dinesen is a wise woman

2007-03-06T13:47:00.000-07:00

A woman writing under a man's pseudonym, Isak Dinesen (author of Out of Africa and Babette's Feast) commented that "the cure for anything is salt water: sweat, tears, or the sea."

I'm sitting in a lull right now - the calm before the storm, really. This week (and perhaps next week, too) are quiet, schoolwise. Completely full up, socially speaking, but that's a whole 'nother story. But it's a week into March now, and after this brief respite, all hell is going to break loose: assignments (I've got 3 lined up to work on already, with more on their way), papers (one lined up, another on the way), thesis things (I've got some ridiculous deadlines headed my way), projects (one major one for my thesis class that has me pre-terrified) and finals (6 of them!). Tied in with all of this is the fact that we're expected to be making some long-term decisions about our practica right now, and I'm not in my "long-term planning" mode these days. I'm really more into the "let's take this one hour at a time, shall we?" mode. *sigh* This, friends, is the work whose only cure is sweat. Lots of metaphorical, academic sweat.

It will be complimented with tears, guaranteed - winter term is always harder than fall, given that you're more tired and have fewer emotional resources to work with. I imagine that there may also be tears of relief when some of the sweaty things are done. I believe that the tears will be the cure for the sweat.

And then the ocean. I'm not a huge ocean fan, never have been. But lately it's come up more and more for me as a symbol of persevering and ultimately triumphing. And if I can make it out to Campbell River in August, then the ocean shall indeed by the cure for my tears.

On October 24, 2006, I emailed this to one of my thesis supervisors:

Hi Dr. H.,

I could meet you today or Thursday at 2.20, or Wednesday at 3.50. I'm sorry, but I won't be able to get my next draft of my program of study until Friday morning, because I'm right in the middle of 3 midterms. But I will get another draft done Thursday night!

Thanks for your patience in helping get through these starting stages! The Jewish midrash says "all beginnings are hard," and I couldn't possibly agree more. :)

Cheers,
Ela.

His response was this:

Ela,

I have you in my calendar at 4:00 pm tomorrow. See you then.

- P.

P.S. - It also says in the midrash that "...there seems to be a covenant made with the waters that whenever the heat is excessive and there is scarcely a breath of air moving on land, there is always some breeze, however slight, on the waters." Perhaps right now you are on land and the heat is excessive, but get this application in the mail, and you will be on the waters.

I think that's the first time that I saw the 'waters' as my seal for my Masters. My sign to myself that I can do this, I can complete this, I can excel at this.

I'm stranded on the land right now and the breeze is dying. But soon - just a few more months - and I'll be in the waters.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have a rubber ducky to buy.

Love,
elizabeth

$54 a month, unlimited entertainment

2007-03-05T19:52:00.000-07:00

"What is it??" you ask excitedly. "Satellite? Movies? Tap dancing??" My friends, it is none of these.

No, it is the Edmonton Transit Service. Seriously! You wouldn't believe the excitement of riding the bus. Why just last Friday... *cue flashback music*

I rode the bus to Compru at around lunchtime. It was packed; standing room only! And indeed, standing in the aisle were three teenaged boys. Not standing together, mind you - rather, they were dispersed down the aisle, each separated by 2 or 3 other passengers. But never mind the other passengers! These 3 didn't! They had a WHOLE conversation just by yelling over everyone else! And how exciting it was! I never KNEW that there were so many different ways to lie to one's parents about one's drug use! Wow!

Riding the bus home from Compru, I sat in front of two teenaged girls. These girls had like, been at a slumber party the night before! OMG!! And like, they like, hate sleeping at this one girl's house, because she's like, really nice to your face, but like, totally bitchy behind your back. I mean, yeah, they were like, talking about this girl behind her back, but this is TOTALLY different. Really!

Then on Sunday, as I rode the bus home from church, I became aware that we'd been stopped at one stop for a rather long time. Tuning back in to what was going on, I heard the bus driver say, very firmly, and borderline rudely:

"SIT DOWN. I'm not starting the bus until you SIT DOWN."

Looking forward, I saw an elderly woman in a fur coat, attempting to stand at the front of the bus. "I don't want to sit down!"

"Lady, I'm NOT starting the bus til you SIT DOWN. Last time you almost fell." Getting out of his seat, the driver came up to the woman, put one arm around her shoulders and the other under her elbow and steered her to one of the six free seats surrounding her. Helping her down into the seat he said "And STAY there until the bus comes to a COMPLETE stop!"

As he climbed back into his seat, I heard a girl behind me comment to her companion that "last time that lady was on the bus, she was back here. She got up before the bus stopped, and tried to get to the doors, but fell down the stairs when the bus lurched. It was pretty freaky."

A few stops later, the old woman in the furs (after waiting for the bus to make a full and complete stop) climbed out of the bus, calling back over her shoulder "now you don't have to worry about an old woman like me!" in what I swear was a roguish tone. Roguish! In fact... I think I even saw her toss a wink at the driver!

$54/month - unlimited entertainment. Complete with strange smells, and people who are so drunk you could get a buzz inhaling the fumes. More fun than a barrel of monkeys! All reasons to ride the bus.

"AL and Ela Ministiries: don't kid yourself, life will still suck when you become a Christian"

2007-03-04T15:00:00.000-07:00

Anna-Lisa and I have decided to become independent missionaries. You see, she answered the door the other day to an elderly man who asked if he could survey her. One of the questions was "do you ever experience feelings of rejection or failure in your life?" Al responded "yes," as I'm pretty sure that most of us would - I mean, c'mon, it's life. It's full of rejection and failure! Anyhoo, this man then showed her two images: one of chaos, and one of neatly lined up images, and asked which she'd prefer. He informed her that the first image was a "self-centred" life, and the second was a "Jesus-centred" life, and that if she became a christian, she would be "free from these kind of feelings [failure and rejection]."

"I AM a christian," she responded "and I think it's a huge oversimplification to say that christians never have these feelings, because we do and to tell people that we don't is setting them up for a huge disappointment."

The man had no idea what to say to that. He attempted to qualify his statement by saying being a christian would change the quality of the feelings, and our reactions to them. Anna-Lisa replied "yes, I agree, but that is NOT what you said. You told me that becoming a chrsitian would fix my life, and that is just not true."

His response? He left. He didn't know what to do with Al's suggestion that he was misrepresenting what christianity has to offer our world. Jesus was pretty clear about just how shitty life would be at times, especially if you chose to follow him. What he promised was that he'd always be with us, providing us with coping strategies and support... things that we have to grow and mature in, in order to make effective use of them.

So Al and I have decided that we want to minister to our world in honesty: don't kid yourself, life will still suck when you become a christian. The point is, now you have someone with you, leading you, loving you and guiding you through it. And that's pretty awesome.

Love you,
e.

Song of Myself - Whitman

2007-03-03T11:54:00.000-07:00

The feeling of health, the full-noon trill, the song of me rising
from bed and meeting the sun.

This is how I felt when I got up this morning (read the whole poem here). The sunshine was streaming in through my windows, I had slept so soundly the night before, and it was just so wonderful to get up! I love mornings like this. I got up, checked my email, drank some water, ate an apple, and went for another run! And the sun was shining, and Chris sent me a new podcast to listen to (Sweatin' to the Indies, it's so great), and I just chugged along, developing a new route for myself. I got home, showered, ate something, started on our paper for 518 (Ok, so I listed all the heading in a word document and saved it, but I still call it starting!), finished reading a chapter for 509, and did my 598 multiple regression analysis. I'm on fire!

Last night I went to the Rush game with Lee; we did pretty well at the beginning, but wound up losing. Bummer. Lee had a rather black sense of humour that I found highly entertaining. I made a rather off-colour comment about the large number of little boys (9 or 10 years old) running around shirtless:

"It's kind of like a vending machine for pedophiles," I said.

In his best "old man pedophile" voice, Lee replied "Oooh, I'm in the mood for a chubby one. Let's have nougat!"

I'm not sure how many of you will find that funny... (A. Leslie, please don't show that bit to G&G!), but I laughed til I cried. Nougat!

Anyhoo, today Robin's making me dinner (his team lost the Superbowl, mine won, I get dinner!), and then I'll be doing more homework. I've actually been working on my thesis this weekend, but I need to put in some more time on it. I should probably also try and write something under a few of those headings that I typed in for 518. ;)

Tomorrow's church, and I'm teaching jr. church. The kids think I'm awesome because, and I quote, "you're the only teacher who knows how to work the DVD player." *lol* I'm looking forward to it. Hopefully it'll still be sunny tomorrow when I run, and it can be as enjoyable as it was today.

Loves you!
E.

Owch!

2007-03-01T15:56:00.001-07:00

Hello boys and girls!

I'm finally feeling like I'm over the jet lag... but it took two nights of going to bed at 9 to get there! :) This morning I got up, and as I puttered through my AM ritual, I just had this great sense of "wow, do I love being back in a routine!" It felt so good to put my bagel in the toaster, boil the water for my coffee, make my lunch... just chug along, doing all the little things I do every morning.

School felt very similar - just going through the same things that I do every Thursday. Today's gift from our motor speech disorders' prof was a large eraser, in honour of our midterms that we just wrote. She encouraged us to reflect on what went well and what went badly, and prepare ourselves to improve for the final. My eraser looks like chocolate, so I reflected mostly on how much I like chocolate, but I did briefly ruminate on the fact that I need to be a bit more "functional" and a bit less "theoretical" when I study for the final.

I took the train home from school, then stopped at the post office to hand in my student loan papers (I am, apparently, exceedingly special, because I did this once in September, and am now doing it again. The other girls only had to do it once. Maybe they'll give me extra money??), then stopped at Shoppers to buy my bus pass (the U-Pass was approved, come September my bus pass will be included in my tuition!), and then headed home. I puttered around a bit, had a snack, and then decided it was time for a run. I haven't run in about 2 weeks - it was awfully cold around midterms, so I went to the gym with my roomie, but not as regularly as I'd been running. And then I went to Prague, where I was lazy and fun-loving, and not running. So I pulled on my gear (I looked super cute, in case you're wondering), and headed out. Can I just say that two weeks does a LOT of damage to how well I run? I only lasted about 20 minutes, there was more walking than usual, I had an asthma attack, and a stitch in my side! I staggered home feeling fat and lazy, but proud of myself for doing something about it, and stretched for a while - I figure I'll be feeling this tomorrow. Note to self: Back to running 3-4 times a week, stat!

(I would just like to point out that by 4 o'clock, I'd been to school, gone to the post office, picked up my bus pass and gone for a run. I'm feeling productive.)

And now: some pictures! I took very, very few photos in Prague, and most of them are of the giraffes at the zoo. I won't bore you with those. :) But here are a few of people, my favourite subject, and a funny translation.

Adrian and Adam - looking highly entertained!

Courtney and Petr - my fabulous hosts. They're so cute!

Emily and I - she looks fabulous. I look... tired. We'll say tired.

Pirates of Caribbean: you see, Czech doesn't have determiners (a/the), so why should English?? Also, they spelled Caribbean wrong - isn't that awesome?! Pirates of Caribbean! Elizabeth Swann! Will Turner! They even had a Pirates of Caribbean II drinks list on the wall, but I didn't want to look too touristy, so I just photographed the menu.

That's all for today folks - have a good weekend!

Love,
Elizabeth

"I'm not lazy. I'm aggressively passive."

2007-02-28T06:30:00.000-07:00

Nothing like laughing out loud in the Toronto airport while reading Douglas Coupland's J-Pod because of the quote that's in the title. It kind of sums up how I've felt since I've gotten home from Prague: jet lagged and aggressively passive!!

The end of my trip was as good as the beginning, if substantially more surreal. Chris, my ex-boyfriend, emailed me while I was staying at Courtney's (I hadn't heard from him in a while), and actually ended up coming to visit me while I was there. There were a couple moments when it seriously felt as though I'd never left, which was actually quite disconcerting! We went to the sports bar with Rob and Marta to watch some of the rugby, and to the best little cafe in Malostranska (where I had an amaaazing latte [Dylan Moran: They're all slumped on the lawn like dead bumblebees, drinking latte! They're all disaffected! It's like Berlin, 1949!]), and to see Babel.

Ooooh the irony. Not "like rain on your wedding day" complete and total lack of irony, but the real, *headdesk* kind of irony. The kind of irony where you go to see a movie all about failures to communicate on multiple levels, where 3 of the 4 storylines aren't in English, and the subtitles are in... Czech. *headdesk* Actually, the movie was good enough that I was still engrossed, despite only being able to understand about 25% of what was actually said. But still!

Coming home was not as smooth as getting there. There was a snowstorm in Toronto, so I got held up there for an additional four hours. By the time I got into bed at mum's, it was close on to 3. I decided to skip Monday's classes and just spend the time getting organized. Then grandma called to say that grandpa was in the hospital, so I headed down to the Wonk with mum to visit them. I bussed back into E-town on Tuesday morning, just in time to meet with Megs, discuss our respective reading weeks, and go into Child Language Disorders to do a presentation with her. By the time I got back to my place, it was 6-ish, and I was wiped. I tried to get some work done on my thesis, but mostly ended up talking to friends on MSN and unpacking. I finally gave up at around 8.30 and fell into bed. I'm feeling quite a bit better this morning!! Hopefully I can get lots done in my breaks today, 'cause I sure didn't get anything done anytime else!!

Ok. I'm off to shower, and then to start on a midterm that's due tomorrow. ;) Me? Procrastinate? Never! I'm insulted that you would think that.

Love you.
Ela

Feels like Home

2007-02-19T02:25:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone! As you've likely guessed, I've made it safely into Prague. My first two flights were late, which led to very tight connections (the longest wait I had was the 10 minutes in Frankfurt, since the boarding line was so long...), but I made it into Praha on time! My flights were amazing - there's definitely something to be said for overseas flights right after midterms. Got on the plane, ate supper, watched 3/4 of The Queen, fell asleep, woke up, ate breakfast, de-planed. Easy peasy, lemon squeezy!

Courtney met me at the airport, and brought me back to her place to have a shower (worst part of travelling for 20 hrs. is how bad you smell at the end of it...) She and Petr have a gorgeous little flat that I just love, and I'm so pleased that they're letting me stay here. She and Petr and I then went for a walk around Letna park (it was a gloriously sunny day), and I had my first Czech beer in ten months in the beer garden at the top of the hill, overlooking the city. Dobre!

Then we went into town and met up with Adrian, and went for a wander. There a carnival meant to be on, but alas, we couldn't find it. We settled for walking the streets and popping into the little pub where the drunken Boston man yelled at us once... "vaguely reminiscent?!" and then it was on to the Afghan place. 12 people were there! We practically filled the whole place up. Just an aside - I had the roasted pumpkin, served with yogurt and curry spices, and it was phenomenal! We chatted away til about 10, and then we headed home. I slept like the dead!

Then yesterday we went for a walk to buy groceries, and then another walk to rent some DVDs. We came back to the flat, and Court made an incredible stuffed chicken dinner and we watched movies together. Falling into bed at around 11.30, I slept soundly til about 2 ... then the jet lag set in. Having had a similar experience last time, I was prepared - I dug my MP3 out from under the covers where it was sleeping with me, and listened to music til I fell back to sleep a few hours later.

Courtney and Petr are both now at work, so I got up lazily, had a shower, and did the cleanup from last night's dinner (hey - she cooked, I clean!). I'm going to spend this morning reading and relaxing, then eat lunch with Court, and then spend the afternoon wandering through Prague. Tonight we're having dinner at a restaurant I've never been to - but word on the street is that it has the best roast pork and cabbage in Prague! Fab!

So that's where I'm at so far. What I haven't managed to describe (not even in the slightest) is how at home I feel here. I was grinning like a retard on the bus, listening to the woman announce the stops. Going into the Delvita was heaven - the pastries and the breads! They're just so wonderful. The yogurt? So delicious. Then just Prague itself - the cobblestones, the dogs, the bizarre fashion statements... it's so good to be here. It feels like home.

Love,
Elizabeth

Hey - time!

2007-02-05T13:19:00.000-07:00

I was definitely not anticipating having time to post so soon... but I just wrote a quiz, and finished with an hour to spare, so I thought I'd sit down and write a real post.

Like I said yesterday, life is stupid busy. I've been having a fabulous winter term socially: lots of time spent with friends! I hosted a good-sized breakfast for dinner party that was a lot of fun, and was a first opportunity for a lot of my friends to meet each other. There was lots of laughter, and a round-the-circle discussion of what each of us would say if we had to come up with a tagline for the movie "Centre Stage."

Anna-Lisa came over last week and we ordered in Chinese food (which I've never done before - I've always gone to the restaurant) and watched some more Black Books. I gleaned a new pick-up line, and will be trying it out at the soonest possible opportunity. "Do you like to eat? I do. Would you like to do it in the same room sometime?"

I spent Saturday with my dad running errands, and got some sweet new jogging pants and another sports bra. Unfortunately, it's disgusting outside. I'm trying to get up the courage to go to the track in the Van Vliet, but that means running in circles in front of other people. Anyway, back to what I was saying.... Dad and I picked Jake up and then went for dinner and to the monster trucks at Rexall - so much fun!! They had some really wicked moto-cross, and there was a fistfight between the quad teams. Ah, nothing says "family sporting event" quite like a fistfight.

I watched the Superbowl yesterday while I studied for today's exam... and the Colts won! Chris says I can't call them 'my team' since I don't watch very many games (or any, aside from yesterday's), but I say that I can! So: My team won! I had a bet with a friend, and he now owes me dinner and dessert. Life is gooood.

I leave for Prague in less than two weeks now - but I've got 3 midterms to write, a project and paper to start, and thesis stuff to continue on with. I'll get it all handled by the time I leave, but I have to admit that I'm feeling a little bit overwhelmed with it all. I went for my medical (for clinic this summer) this morning, and the nurses were telling me I had to get my bloodwork done NOW (which I don't, but they were trying to be helpful), and I started feeling very stressed... so I hummed "Keep on the Sunny Side" all the way back to Corbett. Geeky, yes. Helpful? Also yes.

And hello! I leave for Prague in less than two weeks now. *wOOt* I'm so excited. I'm going to try and do it with two carry-ons and no checked luggage, but I'm going to have to practice packing for that stellar stunt. My friend Courtney's going to meet me at the airport, and then it's going to be a whirlwind tour of all my favourite people and palces!! After the people, I think I'm most looking forward to the food: I miss the old-school cabbage soup, goulash a knedlicky, and of course! fried cheese. Ah, my arteries are clogging in eager anticipation.

So that's my update. Later gators!

Ela

Not Dead

2007-02-04T20:48:00.000-07:00

Not dead. Just busy. Very busy. School, midterms, projects, thesis... Friends, entertaining, cleaning, eating... Sleeping, church-going, teaching... Being happy. I am happy. More when I've got time.

Love,
e.

Friday Night

2007-01-26T21:59:00.000-07:00

Ahoj!

It's Friday night, and I'm just relaxing. A friend from school came over tonight for a beer and a movie, and she's just left for home now. I'm planning on having a hot bath, a book, a cup of tea, and then my bed. It's fresh-sheet Friday, my favourite bedtime of the week!!

Tomorrow I'm going for a run (I have been SO good about keeping up with it!! Megs is my accountability partner, and we make a great team!), and then Chris is coming by to help me get going with a stats software package for Dexter (my 'puter). I'm hoping to get lots done tomorrow afternoon (509 assignment, Duffy reading, Chpt 2 for research methods, Chpt 5 for aphasiology, and thesis stuff), and then Robin's coming over for dinner!

Sunday is church, of course, and I'm doing the reading this week. We're studying Esther, a book that I love, and Lyle has a take on it that I've never heard before. The last sermon in the series was chapter 2, so I'm all over chapter three. I'm spending the afternoon with Megan, and then hoping to be productive in the evening.

Monday is school, and then I'm speaking as part of a panel on what it's like to be in the SLP program. The audience are a bunch of first-year undergrads, and I'm betting they're going to look SO YOUNG!! :D

To end this boring, list-like post, I have a question. I want to do one of my practicums seriously abroad (I'm hoping Australia). I wouldn't mind doing another one a little ways away, though, but I'll be a broke student. What I'm wondering is if any of you have family anywhere neat where I could maybe go and stay with them?? I totally understand if you don't, but I figure: if I don't ask, I'll never know!!

The tub is full! I'm off to relax. Later days,

Ela

Lies, Damn Lies...

2007-01-24T16:06:00.000-07:00

...and Statistics. I was working on my stats assignment today, and I enjoyed one of the questions. So much did I enjoy it, I decided to share it with you.

What does the confidence interval tell you? HINT: I want you to explain it in words as though you were telling a 15 year old niece what it means. It might help to think of political polls and the kind of information we are given about the results.

Well sweetie… a confidence interval tells us how sure we are that our answer is right. For example, you and your friends think that Frankie is about an 8 on the hotness scale. Some of you say 7, some of you say 9... but on average, he's an 8.We might say that we’re 95% sure (pretty darn sure!) that all the girls in your school think Frankie rates between a 7.5 and an 8.5. It’s telling us how sure we are that the number from your friends (our sample) represents the number that all the girls in your school (the population) would choose.

What I find especially enjoyable about this question is the assumption that you would use political polls to explain confidence intervals to a 15 year old girl.... I felt my interpretation was somewhat more relevant. ;)

Other than that and the fact that my carrots in my lunch were sweet today (not bitter, as they sometimes are) today sucked. I won't go into the suckitude, but suffice it to say that I'm exhausted, overwhelmed, and cranky. I wouldn't advise approaching me unless you're waving a large bar of chocolate in front of you like a white flag. Then I promise I won't be cranky. Just sullen and silent as I inhale your chocolate. I need to go for a run and work off some stress... bye for now!!

E.

High on the hill lived a lonely goatherd...

2007-01-23T10:38:00.000-07:00

What do you think those two are staring at, up there on the mountain?

I've also been wanting to talk a bit about this great resource my brother turned me on to. It's called Pray-as-You-Go, and I really, really love it (if you click the link, it takes you to its description). It's a daily prayer devotional developed by the British Jesuits, and I highly reccommend it. It isn't preachy at all; it's beautiful music and someone with a lovely accent reading a scripture and asking you questions about it. I've worked it in as part of my bedtime routine. Read my Bible, then listen to this as I straighten up my room, then read a chapter of my novel, then off to sleep. (Actually - both links might take you to the same place. But you can click on the little tabs underneath the Pray as You Go logo to see the various bits of information.)

My life is feeling incredibly stressful at the moment, and I therefore don't have much to say. But I'm starting to consider my options for August... and I've been graciously invited to Campbell River. I am seriously considering this as an option, and so if you think of me, you could pray.

Ok. I'm off to class.

Ela

And isn't he cute? Chris took this picture at the Provincial Museum, and I just think it's so cute. I need to go back to that exhibit, and figure out just what it is that the two of them are looking at....

Six Weird Things

2007-01-21T15:20:00.000-07:00

I was tagged by Karlie to do this meme, but I can't figure out why... I'M not weird. Not me! ;)

THE RULES: Each player of this game starts with the ‘6 weird things about you.’ People who get tagged need to write a blog of their own 6 weird things as well as state this rule clearly. In the end, you need to choose 6 people to be tagged and list their names. Don’t forget to leave a comment that says ‘you are tagged’ in their comments and tell them to read your blog.

1. On our "torso" anatomy day (thoraic and abdominal cavities) a couple of the girls were feeling a little queasy. I was thinking (though I refrained from mentioning it at the time) that I had a sudden craving for ribs for dinner. Tony Roma's, anyone?

2. I really, really like tuna fish with ketchup and pickle sandwiches. And you are not allowed to mock it unless you've actually tried it. I got the habit from my grandparents. When we had tuna sandwiches, grandpa always dipped his in ketchup, and grandma always put a little dish of sliced dills on the table. All together, it's fabulous!

3. I lay on my side until I'm thisclose to falling asleep. Then I lay on my back. When I wake up about half an hour before my alarm goes off, I roll over and spend those last few minutes on my stomach.

4. I still really enjoy watching cartoons. Kim Possible, Recess and the Weekenders are very fun!

5. When I was a little girl, our church library had a series of books for kids about life skills (personal hygiene, good manners, etc). I loved those books. My absolute favourite was all about how to clean your room. I signed that book out at LEAST once a month, took it home, and cleaned my room by its guidelines. I haven't taken the book out in years now, but I still clean my room following its rules. :)

6. I don't like strawberry gum, strawberry candies, or strawberry cosmetics (e.g., lip gloss). However - I LOVE strawberries!

I'm going to tag Marta and Prairie. I know, I know - it's not 6. But I don't KNOW six people who actually keep up with their blogs!!

Ela

There are no words.

2007-01-19T22:11:00.000-07:00

My life is surreal. Idiotic and bizarre things happen on a regular basis. We all know this. But tonight was especially special.

Allan took me for ice cream, and on our way back, 3 rather drunken men passed us.

"Excuse me miss, c'n I buy a smoke off ya?" slurred one.

"Sorry, I haven't got any," I said without slowing our pace as we passed them.

"Hey buddy! Hey buddy!" another of the men yelled at Allan.

"I'll give ya thirty-five bucks for yer old lady!"

We kept walking - a look of shock on my face, and one of pure grumpiness on Allan's.

"Forty! I'll give ya forty! Ok, Ok - Fifty bucks for yer wife!"

I was horrified! I wasn't worried - Allan was considerably larger than this guy - but I felt so demeaned. For starters, I'm worth WAY more than a mere fifty bucks, and on top of that: if you want to buy me, you bargain with ME, not the man I'm with! What is this, a junta??

Ela

Gloriously Tolerable

2007-01-17T21:01:00.000-07:00

Ah, funny quotes from The Onion. Life right now feels wonderful and stressful. Gloriously tolerable, indeed! There is so much to do this semester, and it feels like I go to school for most of the day, come home, eat supper, and then get right back into the books. I'm working very hard at being more disciplined, but it's tough. And then I worry about falling behind, which is really not the best use of my time.

But I'm getting better!! I've got my term very nicely organized, and I'm doing Ok at keeping on top of things. I'm a bit behind in my readings, but not much, and I plan to spend Saturday morning getting caught up. I've also been good about keeping up with my New Year's Resolutions. On the whole, I'm pretty proud of myself. :)

I had a thesis meeting today. I always dread them, I think because it's all so new to me. I go in there feeling very uncertain of whether or not I've actually accomplished anything that I was meant to have. You can all imagine just how well that works for me. *eye roll* Anyhoo. Today I went in there armed with some re-worked research questions and a new idea for my main objective. One of my research questions came out of our 598 class' study of an article on cheap red wine!! Know what's awesome? That's the research question my peeps were most impressed with! Go me! We spent about 45 minutes making revisions, Dr. B provided me the context for an epiphany (I finally have a way to deal with my lit review! It suddenly has a very concrete purpose!), and then it was time for me to go. As I packed up my stuff, Dr. B told me that I'm right on track, and that I deserved an 'atta-girl!' I earned an atta-girl!! Me! A blurb, a badge and an atta-girl. Life is gloriously tolerable.

There's this other new thing that I'm up to. It's new. And I wasn't going to share it, because I don't really trust myself to keep up with it. But I've done it four times now, and I've got a support network going, so maybe I'll tell y'all about it, and you can silently cheer for me. :) A while ago I was on the net, looking for some information about my health coverage through ASEBP. I'll confess, I was procrastinating. As I mosied through the website, I found a survey all about how healthy one's lifestyle is. Nothing says procrastination like a survey!

I started filling it out, and there was a box you could tick that said something like "if this survey suggests that you are at risk, would you be interested in having one of our Mayo Clinic counsellors contact you?" I clicked yes, a) because I didn't think I'd be eligible, and b) because it sounded research based, and I want to put good vibes out into the research world. You know - I'll do their survey, and then hopefully I'll get enough clinicians to do mine!! :D When I finished the survey, it blithely informed me that I was at risk for weight management and stress management. At risk enough to warrant being enrolled in their program for improving one's health. Crazy.

So Monday was my first "appointment." My counsellor phoned me at a pre-arranged time, and we went through the initial background information. Then I had to choose which program I wanted: weight or stress. I feel pretty confident about my ability to handle stress - I survived last semester! However, given that I'm still pretty...'curvy,' I'm less certain about my weight management skills. So I picked weight. She gave me some very good information about lifestyle diet changes (all well grounded in valid and reliable research!), and then we worked together to set some goals. My job is to drink at least one bottle of water a day, eat way more fruits and veggies, and to... um... well... *coughcoughrunthreetimesaweekcoughcough*

Are you done laughing yet? I know. I know! I am not a runner. But right now... well, it's what fits my schedule and my budget. I could go to the UofA gym after class, but that's at around 4, and that's when it's super busy. I don't like waiting half an hour to get 20 minutes on the elliptical machine. Plus (and I know this is dumb, but I'm allowed to have hang ups!) I feel intimidated by the gym bunnies. *blush* So running it is. And like I said, I've gone 4 times. Not in a row! It's not so bad. I go for 20-30 minutes, alternating 2 minutes of running with one minute of walking. The walking sometimes gets a little longer. ;) And it's Ok. Megs is my accountability partner. My counsellor asked me to schedule my runs in like appointments, so that I'm less likely to miss them. I tell Megan when I'm supposed to go, and then she 'encourages' me to go and do it!! And, of course, guilt trips me if I don't. *lol* Kidding, kidding.

Tomorrow Megan and I are having Christmas, and exchanging our gifts. Friday, Allan's coming over. I think we're going to Marble Slab for ice cream!! And then I'm planning on challenging him to a Scrabble game... *rubs hands evilly*... he's going down! And that's all you get to hear about that. Saturday night I'm hosting a breakfast-for-dinner party that's going to be wicked cool. And Sunday will be a day of church and rest. Oh life! So busy! So gloriously tolerable!

Ooh - I had a confrontation today! The guys who live downstairs really love their bass. And really, who doesn't love them some good bass? But bass that's very loud in my apartment makes me sad. And grouchy. So I got dressed (yes, I was in my PJs at 7. Don't ask). I trundled down the stairs, turned on my winningest smile, and knocked at the door. I think running earlier today may have peaked my endorphins a bit. I was, dare I say it, downright perky. A guy around my age answers the door...

"Hi! I'm Ela! I live upstairs! I'm a full-time grad student, and I'm trying to study! Your bass is really loud in my place! Could you just turn the bass down? The volume's fine, it's just the bass!" *big winning grin!*

The poor guy was blindsided. What are you going to say to the gloriously perky girl at your door, grinning like you're fabulous (or she's nuts), and burblingly requesting that you turn down, not the volume, but just the bass?

"I'm sorry, of course I'll turn it down" he said warily. I think he was worried I was going to burst into a cheer... (I'm sexy! I'm cute! I'm popular to boot! I'm bitchin'! Great hair! The boys all love to stare! I'm wanted! I'm hot! I'm everything you're not! Don't hate us 'cuz we're beautiful, 'cuz we don't like you either! We're cheerleaders!) or maybe blind him with Julia-Roberts-wattage smile.

"Thanks!" I chirped, reaching out my hand to shake his (why? Why did I do that? I don't know. It was the endorphins. I think I was drunk on them).

"Uh, I'm Jimmy..." he awkwardly said as we shook hands, me smiling all the while. "And uh, I'm really sorry about the bass...."

"No worries!" I grinned. "Have a great night!" And I smiled one last time, and headed back up the stairs. And it's been quiet all evening now....

Kill 'em with kindness, Uncle Dave. Kill 'em with kindness.

Love your gloriously tolerable Ela

Miluje te, Praha!

2007-01-14T21:15:00.000-07:00

Hi everyone,

my post's title means (roughly) "I love you, Prague." And I do love Prague. You all know that. And so therefore, you might be interested to know that I'm going back to Prague for reading week! Yaaaaaay! Things just fell into place last week, and it's so amazing. I'm incredibly, incredibly excited. There aren't words. :) Right now I'm working on making some arrangements with friends; I'm hoping they'll allow me to sleep on their floor for a few nights. Once more details are ironed out, I'll share them with you.

I had a really good weekend - hope you all did, too. Friday night I spent with Al. We watched some of Dylan Moran's stand-up comedy, and then the first season of Black Books and laughed ourselves silly. We also had some girly talk... and I didn't get home til 2. Very tired on Saturday!

Saturday was Chris' tea party, at which I cooked the samosas and discovered the amazingness of vegan chocolate cake from Cafe Mosaics. It was so, so delicious. I want one for my birthday! Chris had his usual selection of fabulous people there, and it was fun to chat with everyone. Allan and I left at about 6.30 to go to the Edmonton Rush game. I'd never seen lacrosse before, but I'm now totally hooked. It's very fast-paced and fun to watch, and the crowd really gets into it. I'm definitely looking forward to going to another game.

I went to church this morning and just about froze on my way there. I crept through the doors just in the nick of time, and went to sit with Allan who joined me this morning. I think that my Knox peeps were looking at us curiously and thinking "hmm... wonder who Elizabeth has with her this morning?" ;) Last week Megs had a male friend with her, so she and I discussed setting up a system where we bring a different man each week, just to give our very quiet church something interesting to chat about! :D

So that was my weekend! I'm off to do some reading (which may or may not be school related) and to go to bed. I can't believe that tomorrow's Monday already....

Elizabeth

Craniofacial Osseointegration & Maxillofacial Prosthetic Rehabilitation Unit.

2007-01-10T18:07:00.001-07:00

Hello blog peeps.

No, I'm not a thug. The whole 'peeps' thing got started when Drs. B and H were debating about who was going to supervise my thesis. My material falls under Dr. B's domain, but the format is distinctly Dr. H's. Therefore, I started referring to them as my thesis people, which one of my classmates cleverly shortened to 'peeps.' My thesis peeps! So you can be my blog peeps. Don't you feel special?

Today's title is courtesy of Dr. R and my research assistantship. I'm doing the aforementioned assisting at COMPRU, a place that I couldn't remember the long form of the name for. But now I know it, and am sharing it with you! I went in for my tour today, and it's very cool. My part of the neatness is determining how intelligble samples are. Dr. R tells me that this could potentially be very boring, and so she will also attempt to arrange for me to sit in on various other things going on in the lab. These things could count towards my clinical hours! This is all seeming to cool for words. I also get to wear a badge. A badge! A blurb and a badge. It's all too much for me. ;) COMPRU does a lot of prosthetic work, which is just phenomenal. The befores and afters of the more detailed work that I saw at the clinic today are just unbelievable. I am so thankful to have the opportunity to work there!! :D

Today Megs and I got our topic for our Child Language Disorders project. We get to discuss the use of sign as an augmentative communication device, which is very cool. Please note that we aren't talking about using sign with normally developing children. It's become a recent fad for parents to teach language-normal kids to use signs, supposedly because it aids communication pre-lingually (before the kids are using words). However, research indicates that the iconic signs (signs that look like what they mean, as in reaching your arms up to indicate "pick me up") are used by kids anyway. And the more advanced signs that they teach? The kids learn them about the same that they start using words. So what's the point? And the other thing? Normally developing kids might use the signs... but they tend to say the words as they're signing. Again, what's the point?? Anyhoo, our project will be looking at teaching language-delayed kids signs, in the hopes of them being able to use them in place of words, while they're working on developing learning language. Very cool.

I also got my assignment for my Motor Speech Disorders project. I'm researching Bell's Palsy, which should be very interesting. It's so neat - each of us got a different neurological condition, and we each make up two pages of information, and then we copy all of them, and make a book for ourselves! So sweet!! I'm quite excited, can you tell?

Ok. I've got to go do some homework before Grey's Anatomy starts. Later days!

Ela

Pedantic, Dogmatic and Didactic

2007-01-09T22:57:00.000-07:00

Hi all.

Today was... loooooooooong. Can I just say that having to be at school from 8.30 - 18.20 is a bit much, even for me? Luckily my hockey game was cancelled/forfeited (due to weather) so I got to just come home right after.

It was hard to get up this morning, as I stayed to watch Allan curl last night (he curls at the same place I play tennis, half an hour after my lesson finishes), and ended up getting home after 11. Too late for me. But luckily enough my first class was interesting enough to actually hold my attention. It was the class that just us thesis kiddos take, and it's tag-team taught by the only two men in our department. We went around the circle, each explaining our thesis, and I of course had to go first. whee!

Our other classes were also good. We were quite concerned that the late one (15.30 - 18.20) was going to be pedantic, dogmatic and didactic, but it wasn't! It's taught by a woman who is clearly an incredible clinician, and it was very cool to hear her case studies that she used to support her argument for client/family-centred treatment. More on that another day, when I'm not so wiped.

As I rode home on the train, 2 girls not in the thesis class were asking me about it. I told them about having to go first in the sharing portion, and one of the girls said "well that's typical. You're the person everyone looks at when there's an awkward silence." I was quite taken aback! Compared to others in my class (and I KNOW that a ton of you aren't going to believe this, but it's true) I say very little. But as I thought about it I realized that the few times I do speak up are generally when it's gone silent because no one wants to attempt an answer.

I asked Megs about this in an IM conversation, and she said "You are good at dispelling awkwardness. It's something I really appreciate about you, actually." Another aback-taking! But as I thought about it, I felt like something clicked. It's true - I do speak up to try and dispell tense situations. I'm not afraid to look like a bit of a goof by taking the risk and trying to answer a question that I don't really know the answer to. Sometimes I end up looking like an idiot (like yesterday... I answered "median" but meant to say "mode." "Median" was the right answer, so Dr. H was congratulating me, but I had to stop him and say "I actually meant mode, so I clearly don't know what I'm talking about." Everyone had a laugh, and we moved on.) and sometimes I end up getting it right, and feel quite chuffed. :)

I've now had each of my new classes once, and I kind of feel like vomiting when I look at my organization stuff. My calendar is stuffed with fun things like "3 midterms in 2 days" and a bajillion assignments (we didn't have very many of those last semester). Add to that a thesis, a research assistantship, an ESL student, a co-presidency, a hockey team, and a social life... well, it's going to be hectic. So advance apologies for the weeks where I up and disappear on you.

I now have two funny stories for you, oddly both about Allan.

First: I wanted to bring him a small present from the States, so I picked up a king-size Almond Joy. I love Almond Joys, and you can't get them in Canada, so I figured I'd share the joy.

"I hope you like coconut," I said with a smile.

"I'm allergic to coconut," he replied.

Laughing, I replied "Very funny. Seriously, do you like coconut?"

"Seriously, Ela - I'm allergic. I told you that before!!"

The boy. Is allergic. To his present. And I KNEW that!! Uh huh. Only me. I am the only girl who would bring back a gift made of the ONE THING he's allergic to. I emailed mum, and asked her to bring some Paydays back with her. If he winds up being allergic to peanuts, I'm calling the whole thing off...

Second: We were discussing random Christmas related things, and gifts came up.

"I got new orthotics" he said "since I've got such flat arches."

"Interesting" I replied. "The lady who made my orthotics back when I was in junior high said I had the highest arches she'd ever seen."

There was a short pause.

"Is one of your arches higher than the other?" he queried.

"That's a weird question - I don't think so.... Why do you ask?"

"Oh... I was just wondering if there was a higher-archy."

*ba dum dum*

And that's all you get to hear about that.

I'm off to bed now!

Love,
E.

Revelling in my Boredom

2007-01-07T18:32:00.000-07:00

So it's 6.30 on a Sunday night, and I'm totally bored out of my gourd. However. It's actually very enjoyable! This semester is stacking up to be craaaaaaazy so I'm enjoying what could be the last night where I sit at home with absolutely nothing to do. If only Sunday night TV were better....

In point of fact I've already got a to-do list going for the semester, and could be working on stuff for my thesis, but I decided to give myself the day off. Mostly because I'm feeling seriously brain-dead when it comes to my topic. So I'll come up with brilliant things on... Wednesday. Wednesday feels like a thesis day.

Tomorrow it's back to class (where'd the holiday go??), and I'm half looking forward to it and half dreading it. *sigh* Tomorrow I have Clinical Research Methods, Adult Language Disorders I and Language and Literacy. The clin prof is one of my thesis peeps, and he's very cool, so that should be good. And I'm all over the adult stuff, so I'm very interested in the adult lang. class. I'm less looking forward to the literacy class, but it could be cool, so I'll attempt to maintain an open mind.

Then it's home for sushi! Allan's meeting me at the LRT, and bringing me dinner. And that's all you get to hear about that. That will be followed by my tennis lesson. I hope I don't suck too much after a few weeks off! :D

Tuesday is a stupid busy day. I've got Motor Speech Disorders (v. cool), Child Language Disorders (not so cool), and my 'directed readings and research' class that all of us Thesis kids have to take. It's going to be small and therefore (hopefully) entertaining. The crappy bit is that I'll be at school from 8.30 til 6.30. They moved one of our classes from mid-afternoon to late-afternoon, leaving us with a 3 hr break and class til 6.30. I understand that sometimes things have to be moved, but this is very yucky. 3 hrs isn't quite enough time to make it worthwhile for me to go home. I'm hoping my English student will keep her lesson in that time slot, and then at least it's filled up. Anyhoo. Tuesday night is my first hockey game of the winter term, and it's at 11.43 in Dresden. Feel free to attend.

Megan and I made New Year's Resolutions together on New Year's Day. I've actually got nine of them, but I'm not going to tell you all of them, I promise. What I am going to tell you is this: Whilst Megs and I were shopping in Capitola (hello, Victoria's Secret!), we went into a Payless. The clerk there said that her resolution was to buy one new pair of shoes for each paycheque she earned. I have no comment on how responsible I feel this is. What I do have a comment on is the fact that this lady had a resolution that would actually be enjoyable to keep. What a thought!

Therefore, I made 2 resolutions that are actually fun ones. One is to entertain in my home once a month, so watch out for dinner party stories! And the other is to maintain my outside friendships. By 'outside' I mean non-speechies (those rare birds I so seldomly see!). I've got three or four quite good friends that I just don't see often enough, and I really want to hang onto and deepen those friendships. I hope that they're all Ok with nights of laying on the couch and chatting... I sense that's going to be about all the energy I've got. ;)

So that's where things are... back to school on the morrow!

Love,
Ela

PS - did you know that "education is the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper or your self-confidence"? (It's a quote from Robert Frost.)

California Dreaming

2006-12-30T22:49:00.000-07:00

My friends, it is no longer just a dream. We are in California. We are at my family's place. We no longer have to be in a van for many, many hours a day. Yay!! :) Most of the trip is a blur of driving, eating in non-descript restaurants and sleeping in generic hotels. However, a few entertaining things happened.

Thing the first: Last night we decided to stop in some little town somewhere, and we found a Holiday Inn... a little bit pricey for our "doing it on the cheap" plan. However, Megs and I wandered in, and it was a guy about our age working the desk. Grandma Scott would say he 'really loved the Lord.' ;) So in we go, and I ask if there are any good deals on that night. His reply? Something along the lines of "if I give you a good deal, what'll you give me?" After a bit of "oh that's a handsome shirt," and "you have a very nice accent" we got the $110 dollar room for $70. Which is really a bit of a joke, because it was 9.30 and were there really going to be hordes of people stampeding in behind us to take the room at full-price? But it was entertaining nevertheless. The power of being girls.

Thing the second: It was a beautiful day today (yay! since the days before were foggy) and the drive was exquisite. A quail ran out across the road, and I squealed, and poor Megs (who was driving) was not impressed with me. I was squealing for its life, not because it was cute. Anyhoo, she didn't run it over, so huzzah! And that was the closest thing to dangerous that happened on the whole trip, thank God.

So here we are, safe and sound. And now I think that I might go to bed... all this driving has worn me out.

Love,
E.

"Insert Title Here"

2006-12-28T21:36:00.000-07:00

Hey y'all,

well, we're in Washington - some place that starts with a "K." Our road trip is going well, and tempers are still good, yay!

We got off to a very slow start, due to some nasty snow that started pretty much when we did, and followed us down into Pincher Creek. We'd hoped to cross the border yesterday, but there was just no way. So today we're in southern Washington, and it's probably going to take us two more days to get to Cali. But the weather's clear, and the scenery's gorgeous, so there's very little complaining going on. :)

There has also been an excess of oddly good road food - a fabulous pie place for lunch, and really good Mexican for dinner. Tequila and shrimp chowder? Amazing!! Cleared my sinuses right up. But then I felt fat. And lazy. 8 hours in a car, with two big meals? So I dragged my lazy self down to the hotel fitness 'centre' (read: treadmill, stationary bike, stair-stepper) and ran on the treadmill for 1/2 an hour. Yuck. But I don't feel nearly so guilty now!

And now, to bed with a book, I think. I'm sleepy from dinner, and even the endorphins from actually using my muscles can't override that. G'night!

Ela

PS - I also drove in the States for my first time ever today. Whee for driving on the interstate! I was very nervous at first, but soon settled in at about 120 km/h, occasionally passing people, ocasionally being passed. It was very smooth. Except for the one or two (or six or eight) times I hit the bumpy bits at the side of the road. I was just checking. Y'know - to make sure they were still there. That's all.

E.

You know it's Christmas Break when...

2006-12-23T12:03:00.000-07:00

1) You eat double chocolate cookies for breakfast.
2) You actually sit down and watch TV. In point of fact - you find that you're watching like six hours of TV. Oops.
3) Reading feels like work. Even if it's a novel.
4) Those two or three things that you're supposed to do for school keep getting put off for the really important things: eating double chocolate cookies and watching TV.
5) Forget defined meal-times: Every time is eating time!
6) You wake up one morning and suddenly realize that you haven't left your apartment in 48 hours, and you've had your PJs on that whole time, too.
7) You're wearing Winnie the Pooh PJs.
8) You're writing cheezy lists, and the post before has your eccentric aristocratic name. No thought required!

So I'm loving Christmas break! I'm sleeping loads, and just hanging out with my family. I got to spend a few days with my grandparents, which was wonderful. I don't get to see them enough during the semester, and I think that next semester is going to be even worse time-wise. So I have to get down there while I can! :D

Today I told mum that we have to go for walk, because I really do just sit around the house and do nothing these days. :) And it's lovely outside, so I guess I should be out there. In fact - maybe I'll go have some lunch, and head on out. So Happy Christmas!

Love,
me

Too funny...

2006-12-22T21:20:00.001-07:00

My Peculiar Aristocratic Title is:
Countess Elizabeth the Erudite of Bumswick by the Hole
Get your Peculiar Aristocratic Title

What IS this feeling?

2006-12-18T13:16:00.000-07:00

Oh. It's the BEAUTIFUL and EXQUISITE sensation of having NOTHING TO DO. That's right. Know what's on my to do list? Nothing. Except for go to my tennis lesson tonight. But that doesn't feel like anything major! I also need to plan a lesson for tomorrow, but that also just feels like something that will be enjoyable to do, and not a horrible chore. :)

On Saturday I completely cleaned and organized room, filing away all of last semester's stuff, so it feels like I'm ready for a fresh start come January. Today I re-organized the cupboards, to leave the low ones for my new, short roommate. :) It was oddly fun... somedays nothing is quite as satisfying as a good organizing! Is that weird?

Yesterday Megs and I hosted our Christmas party which was really more of a Christmas gathering, since a number of people didn't come. The food was amazing, and the company was even better!! We played Taboo, which was fun, and sang a whole bunch, which was very cool. It was, in short, a very fabulous way to spend a Sunday afternoon/evening. I also got to meet one of Megan's McGill friends, whom I've heard lots about. It's always fun to meet your friend's friends. :)

Tomorrow I teach, and then am going down to Wetaskiwin to spend a few days with the family. I'm also getting my hair cut (thank goodness!) and coloured. I LOVE getting my hair done, so this is going to be great. Even better, I get to spend time with my grandparents, whom I've hardly gotten to see since I've gotten back. I love being with them, and I'm really looking forward to this. :)

Well, I think I might need a nap. My strenuous morning of watching TV and organizing cupboards has caught up with me. I'm exhausted! ;) Later days!

Ela

I want to break free...

2006-12-15T08:30:00.000-07:00

Oh Queen. Nothing says "finals are ALMOST DONE" like belting out the titular chorus of this post. This afternoon, I'm guessing at about 3pm, the semester is FINALLY going to be over. These last two weeks have been exhausting and stressful (lots of stuff going on outside of school), and I actually curled up under my desk and cried yesterday morning. Then I realized that I was curled up under my desk crying, shook myself, took a firm grip on the shreds of my sanity, and got back to studying. ;)

Right before my anatomy exam yesterday I had to pop into the SLP office to sign my application form for graduate assistantship (teaching or research assistant positions). The admin assistant handed me my form, and said "Dr. R has expressed interest in you potentially TAing for her... would that be alright?" Would that be alright? WOULD THAT BE ALRIGHT? That would be AMAZING. I love Dr. R: she's an incredible teacher, a brilliant researcher, and a committee member for my thesis. I would TA, RA or slave for her - gladly! Now. Before my hopes (and potentially yours, depending on how much you care about me) get all up in the air - nothing is certain. I have no idea how the process works (for all I know this is like being short-listed for an interview, and I still have to actually get the position), and the only information I have right now is that the department will email us when the list of assistantships is put together. But I'll keep you posted.

I wrote my A&P exam right after that, and it didn't go very well. Dysphagia (disorders of swallowing) was alright, but embryology (the development of the foetus) was BRUTAL. Can I just say: If the term wasn't used IN CLASS, IN THE NOTES, or IN THE TEXT it shouldn't be on the final? (Ok - maybe it was in the text, I didn't read all of that....) Anyhoo, it was tough, I think I passed, but I don't really want to know just how badly I did.

Today I'm teaching at 10, having a thesis meeting at 12 (I'm semi prepared - yay!), and then writing my FINAL FINAL at 2. Then it's home to putter around briefly, and then off to get Allan - we're going down Candy Cane Lane tonight. And that's all you get to hear about that. ;)

And then it's CHRISTMAS BREAK! wOOt!! There shall be much lazing, and cleaning, and reading, and organizing, and sleeping, and napping... oh, it's going to be glorious.

Eek! I haven't packed my lunch yet. Off I go!

Ela

There's a dead bird on the awning

2006-12-12T16:39:00.000-07:00

And for once it's not a quote from my audi prof. As I came up the stairs this morning (I had been out teaching), I looked out the front window from the landing - and saw a dead bird curled up on the awning. He looked so serene, so peaceful - and for a moment, I envied the bird his deadness. Ok, Ok, I jest. It's just that it's been a very stressful few days, and curling up somewhere quiet for a looooong time seems appealing right now!

Speech Science went... well, it went. I'm pretty sure I passed, but I can't say much beyond that. Thank goodness Child Language and Audi went better. And I've got more time to prep for Phonology and Anatomy, so I think they'll be fine, too. So I just need to study for those, get my ducks in a row for my thesis meeting, plan Friday's lesson for my ESL student... and it'll be the weekend, and school will be over! Yaaaaaaay Christmas!

However, I'm already thinking about January - my first batch of texts arrived from Chapters today. Aphasiology!! Motor Speech Disorders!! Research stuff... less exciting, so no exclamation points. I'm so pumped to finally be getting into material based around the adult population. I'm not terribly interested in working with kids (not that there's anything wrong with kids, it's just that I'm drawn to the fascinating world of adults), and so this semester has felt like a bit of a slog at times. Bring on the grown-ups!

Ok. Hear that whimper? That's the dysphagia (swallowing disorders) material calling my name. And it's actually pretty interesting (it's adult-focused!), so I'm going to go and read it.

Loves you.

Ela.

In my Defense, I am an Idiot

2006-12-11T13:23:00.000-07:00

Oh, another Audiology Professor quote. And no, I haven't quit blogging... not yet, anyway. A big thanks to those of you who said you're still reading; it totally perked me up. And I need the perking.

It's the end of the semester, and I'm exhausted. I went to bed at midnight and got up at 5.15 to try and prepare for today's exams. Audiology went alright, but I'm feeling a sick sense of dread about speech science, which I write in 36 minutes. I tried doing some last minute studying, but it just wasn't working for me. To make matters worse, I've got a sore throat, and sense a bout of flu or maybe tonsilitis coming on. I'm so tired that I could curl up in this cubicle and sleep... but I've got tennis tonight, an English lesson tomorrow, 2 more finals to study for, and a couple of batches of cookies to bake. Oh, and two textbooks to read for my thesis meeting Friday, along with a timeline to develop and research questions to write. I just want to go to bed and stay there. Forever.

But enough whining! My life is filled with fabulous people doing fabulous things. Last night was Knox's JoyFest, which Megs and I sang in. It went pretty well, and we looked fab. Witness the evidence here:

My sister and her family, my grandparents and my mum were all there, which was lovely. Also there was Allen, the new boy I'm seeing. And that's all you get to hear about that. ;)

Friday and my last exam can't get here fast enough. Hello 12 hour sleeps, plus afternoon naps. *sigh* It's going to be decadent. And then off to California!!!! (Abuse of punctuation, I know.)

Sorry this was such a crap update, but I'm just too tired to think right now. Better posts shall come... just give me some sleep and a miracle cure for whatever illness is awaiting me 'round the corner.

Love,
Ela

Odd Matches

2006-11-25T23:47:00.000-07:00

Our audiology professor likes to say that nothing is impossible, it's just a matter of how improbable it is. He has illustrated this point in several ways, generally leading us to the conclusion that the coincidences we assign all sorts of meaning to are really just these odd matches - and are expected to happen occasionally, just due to statistical probability. All this is well and good. It's hard to argue with the numbers, especially since all speechies seem to have an inordinate fear of integers. However, my relationship God leads me to other conclusions sometimes.

I think anyone who has a personal friendship with Christ experiences times where he seems undeniably absent. I've heard story after story (including my own) of feelings of praying to the ceiling, of feeling utterly abandoned, of being hopelessly lonely... all things that are very hard to cope with at the time. But there are other times. There are times when you look back, and see clearly where God was, and what he was doing. And there are times when you are surrounded by him, and feel him in everything that's happening. This past week has been a time of connectedness, of this kind of communion for me, and I can't help but want to share it.

It all started a week or so ago, when Megs and I were discussing Christmas plans. We both are moderately disillusioned with the season, and as women who weren't originally super keen on living back in Edmonton, are ready to get away for a bit. We started joking about disappearing on a cruise, or a package deal to Cancun or some such dealy... and then I started looking into it. Prices are just way too high for us, and I was about ready to give up, when mum suggested I contact some family we have in California, to see if we could stay there. I started praying about it, talking with God about how much we wanted to get away, and would he please make it possible. I said that I would go ahead and start trying to make plans, and would he please either let things come together or fall apart, whatever was best.

My aunt got back to me quite quickly, informing me that we are welcome to stay there. The next concern was finances. Being a student loan kid, how am I going to afford this? All of a sudden, I had meetings with 3 potential students. I'm not certain yet that any of those will pan out, but I'm just continuing to pray about it. The fact that I've got meetings at all seems to me to be a blessing - I've had an ad up for ages, and heard nothing, but things really started coming together this past week.

Megs and I were still a bit concerned about finances, as we'd need to rent a car to drive from the airport to the house. Not being 25 yet, the prices would be higher, and I still wasn't confident I could swing the costs. Then mum found out her friend down in Cali isn't well again, and would really like for mum to come be with her. Mum called me, and asked if Megan and I would be interested in driving down there with her. This means that we would no longer require a rental car, and would only need to pay for one motel room on the way down, and a return flight (which is very cheap). Suddenly the pieces fell together. As such ... well, we're leaving Dec 27, and I think returning on Jan 5. It's just so incredible how all of this came to work out - and while not impossible, highly improbable. ;) I think it's a God-thing.

The other place I have been seeing God in my life recently is in the amazing people I have in my life. I've often struggled with having good, deep friendships - and it's a lacuna that has been filled to overflowing this year. One thing I've often felt I've lacked are christians, real ones, who share other things in common with me. This year I've grown deeper relationships with Megan, Al and my cousin Chris - all people who have vibrant, dynamic, personal relationships with Christ that affect how they live their lives, and who they are fundamentally - and yet are in touch with reality. They are the kind of christians that I belive bring a smile to Jesus' face - they're out there, building relationships with people, loving people, treating each person as the image of God that they are. I look up to all three of them - they love people in a way that I'm not very good at yet. They are the least judgemental, most contented, and most rooted people that I know - and I'm absolutely cherishing the time that I get to spend with them. I can't possibly express how grateful I am that they are a part of my life... and I'm enjoying every minute I have with them.

I've been struggling lately with this image of myself as a squiggly peg, for whom there is no hole. I feel like most people are fairly compact bundles of traits... their characteristics all sort of line up with each other, making them into more traditionally shaped pegs. I, on the other hand, have these random features that are all over the map. I feel like a constellation shaped peg - with dots scattered from hither to yon; like I'm so beyond complex at the moment that I have no hope of ever understanding myself, yet alone ever having anyone else understand me. And yet these three people (along with my mum and siblings) do seem to understand me. And for some reason that I don't fully understand, they love me back. And they want me to be a part of their lives, just as much as I want them in mine. I don't know if I've ever felt this way about anyone before - and it's such a wonderful feeling. Right now I'm just trying to hold it close, and to absorb it. :)

I just want to say again how happy I am. God is teaching me so much about what it means to be content where I am, and how to grow up and be responsible for my own life, and how to lean on him, and how to surround myself with people of value who cherish me. I love my life. I love every bit of it, and I am so blessed to be in this amazing place.

A whole bunch of other really wonderful stuff has been happening in my life this week, but it isn't stuff that I'm comfortable putting out in my blog for the world to see. As I get more into my life here in Edmonton, more of it becomes less... generally share-able, more discretion is required, and I'm starting to question how much longer I'll bother with a blog at all. I imagine I'll keep it for at least a bit longer.... but be warned - it won't be forever. :)

A quick shout out - charlea from captured me commented on my tequila post. She's a speechie in Australia, which is all too exciting. Charlea - I've been hoping for the past little while to spend a year or two in Australia upon completing my degree - so welcome! I'm very pleased to meet you. :)

And now it's terribly late, and I'm terribly tired, and I'm certain this is a terribly syrupy post. However, I believe that a 'thankful heart is a happy heart' and I just wanted to be thankful tonight.

G'night ducks.

Elizabeth

Just for mum

2006-11-23T20:38:00.000-07:00

A link you can just click on to see me:

Click Me

The Essence of a Sound

2006-11-22T18:04:00.000-07:00

Ahoj!

Today was a very special day. One of my thesis peeps had her lab gifted with $135 000 from the Edmonton Oilers' Community Foundation, the single largest donation that the Faculty of Rehab Med has ever received. Dr. B has 14 of us grad students (she's a VERY busy lady!!), and we all showed up to support her. :) The money is going to be used for research on the effects of intensive voice therapy for children with cerebral palsy, and little boy with CP was there. So was ALL of Edmonton's media - so check the news tonight, or the papers tomorrow. I doubt I'm in any of the pictures, but that's my lab!! I also met Ethan Moreau (and got his autograph *grin*), and Kevin Lowe touched me on the shoulder and said "excuse me." Oh the excitement. ;)

The best bit was afterwards, when Dr B. pulled all of her students back into the lab (after everyone had left) and thanked us for supporting her. She pointed to the little boy with CP who was out in the hallway, and said "when you hate your exams, when you hate me, when you hate that you have to write another draft - remember this. Remember him. Remember that your research will change his life. No matter what population you work with, remember this." And then she got a little teary-eyed, and so did most of us students as well, and then we hugged. It was amazing.

And remember my blurb? http://www.rehabmed.ualberta.ca/carolboliek/gradstudents.htm I'm on there!! It's very exciting. I have a blurb.

Other exciting things? I have a new English student who wants 4hrs of lessons a week. This is great! I think it's just about the right amount of time for me, and I'm looking forward to it. I'm also duly nervous, since - hello! - it's 4 hrs a week. I need to do some serious lesson planning sometime soon, and as finals will soon be upon me, it'd better be sooner rather than later. I'm still excited, despite the fear, since this is a real answer to prayer.

Oh, and the blog title? Dr. P used to work with a professor who loved to talk about the "essence of a sound." You know, a /k/ has "k-ness," an /l/ has "l-ness," and a /p/ has... well, sound it out. ;) (If you don't get it, email me.)

Love,
ela

Feeling Fruzzled is so not Monton

2006-11-20T17:48:00.000-07:00

Ok. I've been putting off writing this post for a while now, mostly because life has been SO busy that I haven't had a lot of time to write. The time that I have had has been spent staring at the screen, attempting to figure out where on EARTH to start.

I last posted on Tuesday, so I guess that I should go from there. Here's hoping I actually remember what happened after that!! Tuesday was the last day of our long weekend, so heading back into school on Wednesday felt like a particularly nasty kick in the teeth. It was like 4 Mondays rolled into one. Luckily, one of our classes was cancelled, so we got to go into Steeps instead, and sit around drinking tea and attempting to study. :) After that we had a super wicked guest lecturer in our Phonology class, and we learned the zen way to do non-linear phonological therapy. Very cool, though I imagine Greek-like to the non-speechies among you. :)

Thursday we only had Audiology, so we headed in for that class. It was another guest lecturer, and it was also fabulous. This one was all about FM systems, both personal and sound field. The research supporting their use in the classroom is unbelievable. Without the sound being distributed via one of these systems, kids in the back corner of the classroom receive only 55% of the speech information the teacher is presenting. Now, if this is a kid who does all the readings, pays close attention, and participates in discussions, it's likely not a big deal. They're going to possess enough context to function successfully. However, let's all think back to our school days, especially the days where we go to pick our own desks. Who was sitting in the back corner? The smart kids? Or the kids who don't pay attention at all? They're incredibly disadvantaged by location alone, and a sound field system could potentially make a huge difference. FM systems also encourage teacher awareness of speech patterns. One study indicates that teachers slow their rate of speech by 10-15% simply because they're wearing a mic. By slowing down, the kids are able to absorb more of the info. Also, because they don't need to yell, teachers can be more expressive, thereby creating more student interest in what's being said. Seriously - what's not to love? I'd really like to get into some schools and do some in-services on this topic, because a few small changes can bring about some major results for kids.

Friday I wrote my A&P exam on laryngeal and cranial anatomy. I was terrified, because I hadn't really studied a lot in advance, and mostly just crammed the night before. However, I must have crammed in the most premium way possible, because I found the exam to be well within my abilities, and only had to lay my head down on the desk and mutter "oh no" once. After that I had my practical exam with Dr. V. For this exam, she pretended to be a 4 y/o and I administered a standardized test to her. When's the last time that you had to tell your very professional instructor that if she can't put her listening ears on and pay attention, then she can't hold Benny the Bunny?? Yes, that's right - I took in a prop, a small blue rabbit. I had it in my pocket, not really even intending to use it, since I figured I'd only need it if she were naughty. Well - she made the administration portions of the test very easy, so made up the challenge with behavioural issues. Benny the Bunny totally saved the day. I love Benny the Bunny - he's my Speechie Mascot now. :)

After my exams I went home to sleep for as long as I could, which wasn't very long owing to having had too much tea earlier on. Darn!! People started showing up at around eight, and we had a little pre-party at my place before going out to the Stonehouse for some dancing and hanging out. Some friends that I haven't seen in years were there, so it was very cool. I was the first to leave, heading out at around 1, and none of the guys offerred to walk me home. I noticed, but wasn't overly upset, since I don't live too far from the bar. About a block and a half into my walk, footsteps came running up behind me, and I got a little tense. It was one of our guys, apologizing because he'd forgottten that I don't drive, and had therefore not come with me right off the bat. "I'd never let you walk home alone this late!" he said. After hearing about the stabbing on Whyte the same night... well, I think I'm done being Ok with walking home alone. From now on, I want someone with me!

Saturday I went out with Robin and his friend, and we had a really great time just hanging out. I bought a new earring for my cartilage piercing, and it's sooo pretty. It looks like the one on the top left, but the silver balls have fuschia stones set into them. I love it!! That night, my cousin Chris and I went out for a beer at the Druid, and just hung out which was very cool. You know, when we were little he drove me crazy with his demands to always have the Fisher Price farm (it was SO much better than the city!!), but he's ended up being a pretty awesome guy. ;)

Sunday morning was church, which was very hard to stay awake in given my lack of sleep every other night. Then I went to Meg's for lunch, since we both had a lot to tell each other about our weekends. She ran me home, and I was doing a bit of homework when a friend called and invited me over for dinner. I've never seen the series Firefly (a Joss Whedon TV show that's got a HUGE following in smart people populations!), so he wanted me to see some of it. We watched the first three episodes, and I didn't get home til after 11. Seeing shoes at the front door, I assumed I was the last one home, and locked and u-barred the door behind me before heading to bed. At around 2, the phone rang. I was so tempted to ignore it, but knew I'd just stay awake worrying it was an emergency, so I answered.

"Hello?" I croaked groggily.

"I can't get in the door!" the voice replied.

"Who is this?" I asked, since I've had people I don't know ask me to let them in the building before, and I'm so not Ok with that.

"It's your roommate!"

"Oh..." I sleepily answered, pressing the "open door" button and crawling back into bed. Suddenly it hit me... if she wasn't in the apartment, she sure couldn't open the u-bar - I'd locked her out! I staggered back out of bed, flipped the u-bar back, and headed straight back for the snuggly comfort of my quilts. So much for assuming she was home.... Assume - it makes an ASS of U and ME.

Today I came into school for our first lecture on swallowing, and it was very cool. The instructor started by explaining why this is important, the impact it has on quality of life, etc. A very awesome way to start a topic out. Big picture first, then fill it in. We had a long break after that, so we headed into Steeps again (man, I love Steeps), where I got my head around some potential ideas for my potential ESL students, and started reading Megs' copy of East of Eden. I hope she finishes it soon... I want to read it. I'm only about 15 pages in, and there have already been many quotable quotes. My favorite so far is "Liza had a finely tuned sense of sin." ;)

And that's it! You're up to date. I'm heading off now to work on an Audi project, eat some dinner, and go for my tennis lesson. Love it. :)

Cheers,

Ela.

PS - I want to get this slogan put on a t-shirt, or maybe a sign for my door, or maybe both, plus a bumper sticker. I feel this way more and more often...

Please don't supply any more information. I'm already too well informed.

I have a great picture of it, but it's protected, so I can't show it to you, sorry! If you're desperate to see it, let me know, and I'll email it to you. :)

PPS - New words for my dictionary:

Fruzzled (Adj.): a combination of frustrated and puzzled
That material is so confusing! I was totally fruzzled trying to get through it.

Monton (Adj): dervied from the fandangus Steeps' dessert, Monton refers to something beyond fabulous, something nigh unto fandangus.
Check that hottie out! He's so monton.

Tuesday Morning Motivation

2006-11-14T11:56:00.000-07:00

I crawled into bed at around 11 last night, all set to sleep in this morning. I woke up a bit when I heard my roomie get up and start getting ready, but fell back asleep. When I woke up later, wide awake this time, I was convinced that it must be late (which for me would be about 9!). I smiled, thinking of how fabulous sleeping in is, rolled over, and checked my clock. 7.30. Yeah. I know, it's sad. I stayed in bed for a bit, but eventually decided I'd rather get up. I puttered into the kitchen, turned up the heat (I realize that I really am turning into my dad - every night before bed, I turn the heat down, every morning, I turn it back up), wandered into the bathroom for a shower, mosied into my room to get dressed, check email, etc.... I studied for what felt like forever, but was really about 15 minutes, and decided I was bored.

It was 9. Nine o'clock in the morning, and I was already bored. I have a to-do list as long as my arm for today, but as a friend and I say, I'm not feeling it. Apparently, my motivation rode off on my favourite steed Tangent. *sigh* I decided that I really wanted pancakes and bacon for lunch, but had none of the ingredients, so I actually got dressed (shocking! as I usually live in my PJs), and went to Safeway. I had to buy milk and flour, and there was a wicked deal on those big jars of Miracle Whip, and a good deal on boxes of mandarin oranges.... Well let's just say that staggering home through the poorly (if at all) shoveled walks with 40lbs of groceries probably provided some good entertainment for the balcony smokers along my route. ;)

I got home, put everything away, and decided to study. Another 15 minutes, and I was done with that. ;) So I made an early lunch, and enjoyed it thoroughly. Nothing says "screw school!" quite like bacon. And now, now I shall attempt my to-do list. I want to finish reading my anatomy notes. Then I want to do the 505 Zemlin reading. Then I need to do a few more slides for our audiology project. And I need to get over to the U for some more practice with the tests. I'm writing this all down here, in the hopes that it'll guilt me into actually getting some work done. Odds aren't good. :)

Laters,
E.

Love!

2006-11-13T21:49:00.000-07:00

Tennis lesson numero uno was awesome!! :D Michael's lessons this summer totally paid off, and I wasn't the worst one there (unlike hockey!). We have a really great coach for our lessons, so I really enjoyed learning from him. And he didn't make us feel stupid when we sucked. ;) I'm really looking forward to next week's lesson. And according to their coaching system, we'll be able to play a full-on game by the end of lesson 3. Whee!

So now I'm at home, and I've put in a bit of time on our audiology project, and I finished a speech science reading. Next is some anatomy, followed by snuggling into my cozy bed for some sleep. Man, I love long weekends - but this one has just flown by. I think I need to take two! :D

So once again, life is lovely, I'm so happy, and I can't get over how blessed I am.

Love,
me.

That's Just Speechie!

So long, and thanks for all the fish.

Wherein Ela remembers how much she likes a schedule.

Her name is Artemis.

Archers, fletchers, and bowyers, oh my!

It's only been 24 days!

A quote to tell you where I'm at...

Couple stuff

Just the blahs

I don't think my red coat is going to match this board...

Lovely, lovely

"Boys," she said with disgust.

Wishing...

Baby it's cold outside...

Polymer Clay

Happy New Year!

Progress

Wherein Ela is something of an idiot

How to Make an Ela Feel Fabulous

So it's a little more 'bumpy' than 'gentle'

And so begins the gentle descent.

A sort of spare moment

Balance

Unbalanced: A Question of Priorities

I should probably be doing something more productive...

Sleepy!

Back, Back in the Grad School Groove

Alas poor August - I knew it well

Sneaky Stress

Ela's Soapbox Presents: The Language of Touch

Exciting

Job Love

*insert something witty here*

So much with the busy...

Ugh, Communication

Hold Me

Selective Eaters...

Super Secret Sacks!

More Singing!

Stu, Stanley and Stella

You know Elizabeth's tired when...

Muddled

Shakespearean Hokey Pokey

Because I have nothing to write...

Grin

Holy cow, where'd the week go?

Woah-oh, we're halfway there...

Going Crazy

Other people say it better...

Swiper, no swiping!

Balance

Ugh, change

Back to School

No Excuses

I LOVE these books...

Exam Stress

Thesis = Paper

Some days I think I should have just gotten a job...

Cool Cat

Do you think she'd look at you if you were poor?

Commitment-Phobes

A new way to know all about me...

Blech

*toot*

ISFJ

That was odd...

How do you make a kleenex dance?

Put your right foot forward, put your left foot forward, put your right foot forward again...

Isak Dinesen is a wise woman

$54 a month, unlimited entertainment

"AL and Ela Ministiries: don't kid yourself, life will still suck when you become a Christian"

Song of Myself - Whitman

Owch!

"I'm not lazy. I'm aggressively passive."

Feels like Home

Hey - time!

Not Dead

Friday Night

Lies, Damn Lies...

High on the hill lived a lonely goatherd...

insert something witty here

toot